if I never have a baby?'
Pam said the only things she could. 'I had you, didn't I?' Then, 'You'll have your baby.' Then, 'Maybe this just isn't the right time.'
'But I wanted to do it with them.'
'That is not a reason to have a child at this age. For now, you can give them support.'
'Will you?'
'Yes.' Pam hadn't thought it through, but it wasn't rocket science. Tanner could do what he wanted, but so could she. 'I'll lobby for Susan. I'll get everyone who loves her to the meeting. You could do the same with the kids. Have them talk to their parents.'
'Like my word matters? Everyone knows we're on the outs.'
'Tell them Susan's the best principal they've ever had. Tell them they need to keep it that way.' Pam paused, heart aching. Knowing of Abby's involvement, she felt more responsible. 'You could also tell Lily you're rooting for her baby.'
'She wouldn't listen,' Abby murmured, pulling up her knees. She still looked miserable, but at least she wasn't crying. 'They hate me now.'
Pam thought of Susan, Sunny, and Kate. 'They probably hate me, too.'
'I loved being with them.'
'Me, too.' The need to belong-the basis of pact behavior-was wrong in this case, but Pam understood its power.
'Why don't we fit in?' Abby asked.
'Maybe because we haven't been… relevant,' said Pam. 'We have to make ourselves relevant.' She had an idea. 'Like with knitting. I'll pull strings to get an awesome catalogue promotion, and if your uncle Cliff balks, I'll threaten to shut down PC Wool.'
Abby looked up. 'You wouldn't shut it down.'
'Not, but I'd threaten to if he doesn't give me the space I want, and we both know how profitable PC Wool is. So,' Pam said, 'we have to make sure we have enough finished samples. Kate will tell me what's already done, but you and I can knit more. Susan suggested I make a shawl. I can do that. You can knit gloves. Gloves are very in.'
'I can't knit gloves. I've never knitted gloves.'
'You've done socks.'
'No one sees mistakes in socks. They see every last one in gloves.'
'Then you'll have to make sure there are none.' Pam had another idea. 'Cashmere,' she breathed reverently. 'The woman we visited was good, and she has stock. What if Kate could dye up a batch really fast? Would you do a pair of gloves then?'
Abby looked tempted. 'Cashmere? I could try.'
'Trying isn't good enough. We both have to
Chapter 26
Pam had always considered Tanner a leader, but now wondered if his leadership skills were limited to Perry & Cass. She knew he liked Susan, but he was avoiding helping her. Disillusioned, Pam refused to discuss it further, which meant that they weren't talking, which meant she had more energy to talk with friends.
Defiant? Oh, yes. For the first time in her married life, she was bucking the tide. That made success very important to her.
She set herself to the task first thing Thursday morning, and it was an awakening. Everyone she called thought Susan was a good principal, but the editorial in the Gazette had many on the defensive. I talk with my kids. I watch them. I know what they're doing. The implication was that Susan did not, and that to side with her was to side with a bad mother.
So Pam fine-tuned her approach, and, in doing so, discovered her own strength. Lady of leisure that some accused her of being, she often had coffee or lunch with other parents and therefore knew them better than, say, Kate or Sunny might. This allowed her to make her calls more pointed.
Okay, Lisa, remember the rough patch you went through with Trevor? You thought he was on drugs. He kept denying it, but you weren't sure you believed him. He got through it, but in hindsight, what do you think? Was he experimenting? You asked all the right questions. And so did Susan. Is she any different a mom from any of us?
Hey, Debbie, you have a daughter. She didn't want to look like a nerd, so she refused to study. Who talked her through it? Don't you owe Susan something for that?
Zaganackians were complacent. It was up to her to rile them up.
Kate didn't have a business degree, but she did have common sense. Since PC Wool was her livelihood, she kept a list of her customers. She had never used it for anything personal before, and did feel a moment's qualm. She was, after all, one of the town's bad moms.
But was she any worse than others whose kids hadn't always followed the rules? Was her daughter any less good a person because the rule she broke had created a life? Who would be affected by it, beyond Mary Kate and her family? No Mello was asking for handouts. They would take care of their own.
Resentful of those who would judge, Kate worked up a head of steam, then e-mailed every Zaganackian who had ever placed an order for PC Wool. She worded it like a party invitation. Knitters love knitters. Come support our own Susan Tate by rallying around her at the high school auditorium on Wednesday evening. It starts at 7. See you then.
There was nothing subtle about the message. She guessed that if her bosses at Perry & Cass knew she was using the list, they would not be happy. But she wasn't happy with Tanner Perry.
Besides, would he ever know? She seriously doubted it. His nose was stuck up too high for him to see what the town wanted. Even Pam was defying him now. That alone was reason for Kate to join in.
Left to her own devices, Sunny might have stayed under the radar. Her own daughter was pregnant, and while she and Jessica were on the same page now, the girl's condition wasn't something Sunny wanted to flaunt.
Then she got Kate's e-mail and, soon after, a customer mentioned talking with Pam. If Kate could speak up, so could she. And Pam? Pam embodied Respectability with a capital R.
Increasingly the idea of standing up for Susan held merit. Wasn't it one step removed from standing up for herself? She had stood up to her mother with amazing success. No one had ever said respectability required invisibility.
So she began talking with customers who either knew Susan or had kids in the schools. You're a mother, just like Susan. Have your children never disobeyed you? Does that make you less good a mother? And then, even more shamelessly, You'll want to be supportive. This is a rough time for Susan. You know about the baby, don't you?
The more she talked, the bolder she grew-because people were actually listening. Rather than being a liability, her own daughter's pregnancy seemed to give her legitimacy. I know what I'm talking about was the message.
It was definitely Empowering.
Susan wasn't as plucky. She was worried about Lily, worried about the baby, worried about her job. As grateful, even touched, as she was when she learned what Pam, Kate, and Sunny were doing, she was still frustrated. She had always been her own best champion. Now she was in an awkward position.
She decided that an e-mail to the parents was the way to go. But begging them to sing her praises wasn't her usual style.
'Maybe it should be,' Rick said that evening. 'If you don't toot your own horn, who will?'
