“They are now.”
The door goes knock, it’s another nurse, the same uniform but the different face. She says we should put our masks back on because we have a visitor. I never had a visitor before, I don’t know how.
A person comes in and runs at Ma, I jump up with fists but Ma’s laughing and crying at the same time, it must be happysad.
“Oh, Mom.” That’s Ma saying. “Oh, Mom.”
“My little—”
“I’m back.”
“Yes, you are,” says the she person. “When they called I was sure it was another hoax—”
“Did you miss me?” Ma starts to laugh, a weird way.
The woman is crying too, there’s all black drips under her eyes, I wonder why her tears come out black. Her mouth is all blood color like women on TV. She has yellowy hair short but not all short and big gold knobs stuck in her ears below the hole. She’s still got Ma all tied up in her arms, she’s three times as round as her. I never saw Ma hug a someone else.
“Let me see you without this silly thing for a second.”
Ma pulls her mask down, smiling and smiling.
The woman’s staring at me now. “I can’t believe it, I can’t believe any of this.”
“Jack,” says Ma, “this is your grandma.”
So I really have one.
“What a treasure.” The woman opens her arms like she’s going to wave them but she doesn’t. She walks over at me. I get behind the chair.
“He’s very affectionate,” says Ma, “he’s just not used to anyone but me.”
“Of course, of course.” The Grandma comes a bit closer. “Oh, Jack, you’ve been the bravest little guy in the world, you’ve brought my baby back.” What baby?
“Lift up your mask for a second,” Ma tells me.
I do then snap it back.
“He’s got your jaw,” the Grandma says.
“You think so?”
“Of course you were always wild about kids, you’d babysit for free. .”
They talk and talk. I look under my Band-Aid to see if my finger’s going to fall off still. The red dots are scaly now.
Air coming in. There’s a face in the door, a face with beard all over it on the cheeks and the chin and under the nose but none on the head.
“I told the nurse we didn’t want to be disturbed,” says Ma.
“Actually, this is Leo,” says Grandma.
“Hey,” he says, he wiggles his fingers.
“Who’s Leo?” asks Ma, not smiling.
“He was meant to stay in the corridor.”
“No problemo,” says Leo, then he’s not there anymore.
“Where’s Dad?” asks Ma.
“In Canberra right now, but he’s on his way,” says Grandma. “There’s been a lot of changes, sweetheart.”
“Canberra?”
“Oh, honey, it’s probably too much for you to take in. .”
It turns out the hairy Leo person isn’t my real Grandpa, the real one went back to live in Australia after he thought Ma was dead and had a funeral for her, Grandma was mad at him because she never stopped hoping. She always told herself their precious girl must have had her reasons for disappearing and one fine day she’d get in touch again.
Ma is staring at her. “One fine day?”
“Well, isn’t it?” Grandma waves at the window.
“What kind of
“Oh, we racked our brains. A social worker told us kids your age sometimes just take off out of the blue. Drugs, possibly, I scoured your room —” “I had a three-point-seven grade average.”
“Yes you did, you were our pride and joy.”
“I was snatched off the street.”
“Well I know that
“I couldn’t sleep without pills. The not knowing was eating me up, it really wasn’t fair to your brother. Did you know — well, how could you? — Paul’s got a little girl, she’s almost three and potty-trained already. His partner’s lovely, a radiologist.”
They talk a lot more, my ears get tired listening. Then Noreen comes in with pills for us and a glass of juice that’s not orange, it’s apple and the best I ever drunk.
Grandma’s going to her house now. I wonder if she sleeps in the hammock. “Will I–Leo could pop in for a quick hello,” she says when she’s at the door.
Ma says nothing. Then, “Maybe next time.”
“Whatever you like. The doctors say to take it slow.”
“Take what slow?”
“Everything.” Grandma turns to me. “So. Jack. Do you know the word
“Actually I know all the words,” I tell her.
That makes her laugh and laugh.
She kisses her own hand and blows it at me. “Catch?”
I think she wants me to play like I’m catching the kiss, so I do it and she’s glad, she has more tears.
“Why did she laugh about me knowing all the words when I wasn’t making a joke?” I ask Ma after.
“Oh, it doesn’t matter, it’s always good to make people laugh.”
At 06:12 Noreen brings another whole different tray that’s dinner, we can have dinner at five something or six something or even seven something, Ma says. There’s green crunchy stuff called arugula that tastes too sharp, I like the potatoes with crispy edges and meats with stripes all on them. The bread has bits that scratch my throat, I try to pick them out but then there’s holes, Ma says to just leave it. There’s strawberries she says taste like Heaven, how does she know what Heaven tastes like? We can’t eat it all. Ma says most people stuff themselves too much anyway, we should just eat what we like and leave the rest.
My favorite bit of Outside is the window. It’s different every time. A bird goes right by
• • •
Ma and me keep knocking into each other in the night. The third time I wake up I’m wanting Jeep and Remote but they’re not here.
No one’s in Room now, just things, everything lying extra still with dust falling, because Ma and me are at the Clinic and Old Nick is in the jail. He has to stay forever locked in.
I remember I’m in the pajamas with the astronauts. I touch my leg through the cloth, it doesn’t feel like mine. All our stuff that was ours is locked in Room except my T-shirt that Ma threw in the trash here and it’s gone now, I looked at bedtime, a cleaner must have took it away. I thought that meant a person cleaner than everybody else, but Ma says it’s one who does the cleaning. I think they’re invisible like elves. I wish the cleaner would bring back my old T-shirt but Ma would only get cranky again.
