“Move as you want,” he instructed her.
For a moment Isla could only sit there, the feel of him inside her blocking out everything else. Isla rotated her hips and moved them front to back. The friction of their bodies had the flames of desire licking at her body once more.
She could feel her body building back up to what had occurred before her first climax. She wanted that again, wanted to feel it with Hayden inside her.
Isla held onto Hayden as her body began to spiral out of control. His arms locked around her, his breathing harsh and ragged as he thrust inside her.
He moaned and began to lift her up and down his rod. Isla could do nothing but experience the bliss of having him fill her time and again. His tempo increased and he went deeper, so deep he touched her womb.
Isla heard him whisper her name a heartbeat before his fingers dug into her back and he thrust inside her hard and fast. She could feel his cock pumping his seed inside her, and to her surprise, she peaked a second time.
Hayden held her against his chest, softly stroking her hair until she had come down. He was still inside her, holding her as tenderly as a lover would.
She dropped her head onto his shoulder and sighed. He lifted her off him and laid her on the bed before he rose and walked to the pitcher of water.
Isla watched as he poured water over a cloth and wrung it out. He sat beside her and spread her legs. It never occurred to her that she would need to be cleaned.
There were no words between them as he washed her blood and his seed first from her body, then his own. She expected him to leave then, to force some pretty words and go. Instead, he simply stared at her.
“You gave yourself to me,” he said. “Why?”
Isla glanced away. How did she tell him he had called to her on a level she didn’t understand? That she hadn’t wanted to give in, but her body hadn’t been her own?
“Is it wrong to wish to feel some happiness? Do I not deserve it?” she asked instead.
He reached out a finger and played with the ends of her hair. “I never said that. I’m simply wondering, why me?”
“You mean why you because you despise
“Aye.”
Isla blew out a breath. “You saw me. Despite who and what I am, you saw me for me. I’ve had men lust after me. I’ve had men try to force themselves on me. But I’ve never had a man look at me with such desire or kiss me with such fire and hunger.”
Silence descended upon them until finally Isla asked what she needed to know. “Why me? Why did you come to me if you hate what I am?”
“That is a question, isn’t it?” he asked. “I’m not sure I can answer it.”
She sat up and almost reached for him, but at the last moment decided against it. “You were tender with me, concerned even when you learned I was still a virgin. I thank you for that.”
Hayden lifted a strand of her hair to his face and inhaled. “I think we’ve both made a muck of things.”
“Whatever happens, I won’t regret this night.”
He dropped her hair and stood. Without another word he began to dress. Isla watched him, fascinated with every aspect that was Hayden.
When he finished he glanced at her and climbed onto the window. She waited to see his Warrior form, to know what color he would turn, but he melded into the shadows and then was gone.
NINETEEN
Hayden knew he was a fool. Even as he hurried away from Isla, he longed to return. It had stunned him to his very core to learn she had never been taken by a man. He’d been angry at her for not telling him, and angry at himself for being so rough with her.
But, by the saints, she was a passionate woman. She brought out a side of him he hadn’t known he’d had.
Knowing he had been the first to lay claim to her spectacular body excited him, made him long for another taste of her.
Hayden climbed into his chamber from his window. He wished Logan was there, though he knew he wouldn’t confide in his friend. What had happened between him and Isla was private.
Hayden wanted to deny it, but that was part of the reason. As much as he wanted to think Isla was different, she wasn’t. She was a
He kicked off his boots and ran his hands down his face, weary to his core. He then lay back on the bed and threw an arm over his eyes.
No matter how hard he tried, sleep eluded him. He kept seeing Isla’s beautiful face and amazing body in his mind’s eye. He could still hear her moans, her soft cries of pleasure. She had screamed his name, just as he had wanted.
He should have stayed with her. If he had, he’d have taken her again. He had given her pleasure, that he knew. Her first sexual experience should have been with someone who cared about her, someone who would stand by her side.
He wasn’t that man. Yet, as much as he regretted being with her, he wondered if he’d have the willpower to turn away from her the next time.
And he knew he wouldn’t.
“Damn me,” Hayden mumbled.
This couldn’t be happening to him. When he’d found his parents, he’d vowed to them he’d find their killer and meet out his vengeance. As the strongest warrior of his clan he’d always been there to protect his family. He had never failed them until that night.
And with his family’s death, Deirdre had come for him. So much had changed that night. Everything he had been had died along with his family.
*
Isla was up early and baking in the kitchens. She had managed a few hours sleep without the nightmares, her dreams instead filled with Hayden and his kisses. A very welcome reprieve, but one that made her realize everything she had missed out on while being in Cairn Toul.
She was sore, and every time she moved, it reminded her of a night she would never forget. Even now as she kneaded the dough for the bread she found herself thinking of Hayden.
Though nothing had changed, she saw the world with new eyes now. She had known what happened between a man and a woman, but to experience it herself, and with someone like Hayden, it gave her a new perspective.
Now she really understood the looks passed between lovers like Cara and Lucan, Marcail and Quinn, and Larena and Fallon. She recognized the secret smiles shared between them, and the small touches.
It should have been enough. Months ago it would have been enough. But now that Isla had seen what her life could have been, what it could be, she wanted more. She wanted what Cara, Marcail, and Larena had.
Isla’s chances of ever finding that kind of happiness were slim, even if she did allow herself to get close to anyone. Yet the longing was still there. She feared it would now always be there.
“Up early again, I see,” Cara said as she walked into the kitchens and began to get the morning meal ready.
Isla shrugged. “I used to spend most of my days in the kitchens baking. It seems natural still.”
“Well, I know the men will enjoy it.” Cara smiled and stuck her hands in the dough. “With Galen being gone for a while maybe now some of the others can get more food.”
