'We may need to ask a few more follow-up questions,' Detective Lacey said, making an effort to sound pleasant and as though any further questions would be inconsequential—no problem, no sweat, don't worry, be happy.
'So, you'll be here?' Young asked, pointing at the floor to indicate she meant right here at this hotel, don't leave town.
'Yes, I suppose we will,' I said.
'Of course, you'll want to go to the funeral,' Young said, as if something she should have known was just now popping into her head.
'No,' I said.
She cocked her head as if she couldn't have heard me correctly. 'Say what?'
'I don't go to funerals,' I said.
'Not ever?'
'Not ever.'
'What about your mother's? We heard she died last year.'
They'd been making phone calls. 'I didn't go.' I didn't want to feel her presence again, not ever, not even from the grave. 'Goodbye,' I said, standing and smiling at them. They were definitely disconcerted, now, and exchanged one of their glances again, without the certainty.
'So you'll stay in town until we contact you again,' Detective Young said, tucking her hair behind her ear in a gesture oddly reminiscent of that of her partner.
'I think we've established that,' I said, keeping my voice sweet and even.
'Of course we will,' Tolliver said, without a trace of irony.
six
AFTER the departure of the police, the silence that fell was the noisiest silence we'd ever shared. I didn't even want to look at my brother, much less discuss what had just happened. We didn't move. Finally, I threw my hands up in the air, made a sound that came out 'Arrrr,' and stomped into my bedroom, slamming the door behind me. It immediately opened, and Tolliver strode in.
'All right, what did you want me to say?' he said. 'Did you want me to lie?'
I'd thrown myself down on my bed, and Tolliver chose to loom over me, his hands on his hips.
'I didn't want you to say anything,' I said, in as neutral a voice as I could manage. But then I bounced to my feet to glare at him. 'I didn't want you to say anything today. What I would have wanted, if I could have had it, was for you to have shown a little discretion, a little common sense, months ago! What were you thinking? Was your upper brain involved in this process at all?'
'You just… can't you cut me some slack?'
'No! No! A waitress here or there, well, ick, but okay! You meet someone in a bar, well, okay! We all have needs. But to have a relationship with a client, someone involved in a case… come on, Tolliver. You should keep your pants zipped! Or can you?'
Since Tolliver was so in the wrong, he got even angrier. 'She was just a woman. She isn't even a member of the family, at least not the direct family!'
'Just a woman. Okay, I'm seeing it now. Just a hole for you to sink into, is that what you're saying? So much for being selective. So much for thinking every time you have sex, 'Is this the woman I choose to have a baby with?' Because that's what it means, Tolliver!'
'Was that what you were thinking when you screwed that cop in Same? How you wanted to have his baby?'
There was another silence, this one charged with other tensions.
'Hey,' he said, 'I'm sorry I said that.' The anger drained away.
'I don't know if I'm sorry or not,' I said. 'You know you did a wrong thing. Can't you just say it? Do you have to justify it?'
'Do you have to ask me to?'
'Yes, I think I do. Because this wasn't only personal, this was business, too. You've never done that before.' Okay, at least I didn't think he had.
'Felicia wasn't paying us. She's not really a member of the family.'
'But still.'
'Yeah, yeah,' he said, crumbling at last. 'You're right. She was too close to the action. I shouldn't have.' He smiled, that rare, radiant smile that almost made me smile in return. Almost. 'But she made a real pass at me, and I guess I was too weak to turn it down. She was offering, she was pretty, and I couldn't think of a real reason why not.'
I tried to think of something to say, but I couldn't. Actually, why not? Exactly for this reason, that's why not— because this time, Tolliver's sex life had backfired on us. I thought we were in even more trouble than we'd been before, and that hadn't been inconsiderable.
Tolliver hugged me. 'I'm sorry,' he said, and his voice was quiet and sincere. I hugged him back, inhaling the familiar smell of him, laying my cheek against his hard chest. We stood like that for a long minute, with the dust motes floating in the sun coming through the hotel window. Then his arms loosened, and I stepped back.
'This is what the detectives should have asked you: who called you about the cemetery?' I asked.
