“Quick, move!” Liesel ordered Eric. “If he sees us here, he’ll kill us all over again.”
I didn’t hear anything more, and then the faint sound of whispering came from the hall beyond my room. Clearly, they’d fled for the moment.
I pulled the covers off myself, fumbling with them a little and grateful I’d stayed dressed in Lily’s best jeans and T-shirt, which wasn’t saying much, and started for the window. The moment Will saw me, his face relaxed and he smiled, an event so rare that it stopped me in my tracks and made my pulse accelerate.
No, he wasn’t angry at all, it seemed. Of course, that might end up being the least of our problems. How did we go about this? We were friends still? More? And were we friends as Alona and Will? Or as Lily and Will? Would he ever be able to see me for who I was, when I looked like someone else?
Just thinking about it made my head, and heart, hurt.
20
Will
Lily — well, Alona, really, I guess — came to the window slowly, limping as she walked and her hands out at her sides as if to catch herself if she started to fall.
She struggled to raise the window one-handed, hanging on to the sill with her other hand for balance. I wanted to help, but the screen was down so I couldn’t reach it. Plus, I could read a very familiar stubbornness on her face, though it was not an expression I was accustomed to seeing on this particular face.
She finally managed to shove the window up and prop her hand under it to keep it from falling.
“Hi,” I said, feeling awkward and shy suddenly, like this wasn’t the girl I’d been making out with in the bushes just a few days ago. I mean, it was, but it also wasn’t.
“Hi,” she said back, in an equally uncomfortable tone. Her gaze darted everywhere but my face.
I hesitated. “I guess I just wanted to be sure that you’re okay after everything that happened with the Order and—”
“Liesel and Eric are here,” she said brightly in warning. “They’re asking for my help.”
“What?” I asked, confused.
Liesel burst in from the hallway with Eric at her heels. “You weren’t supposed to tell him!” she protested. “We just came to see who was taking up all of your time instead of us,” Liesel said to me with a pout. “And then it turns out she’s a ghost-talker like you.”
I stared at Lily/Alona.
“I can hear them, but I can’t see them,” she said to me in an undertone.
But that shouldn’t have been possible. Lily had never been able to see or hear ghosts before, nor had Alona when she was alive, I was fairly certain. Then again, Lily had almost died while Alona was merged with her. Who knew what the combination of a near-death experience and a ghost living inside of you would do?
“So, now that there’s two of you, you can really step it up.” Liesel smoothed her hands down the front of her dress. “I’m thinking that if we talk with Claire tomorrow—”
I sighed. “Eric, man, you’ve got to speak up.”
He glared at me. “Shut up, Will.”
Alona/Lily looked intrigued.
“What does Eric have to do with any of this?” Liesel asked, sounding confused.
“In a word? Everything,” I said.
Eric’s face was turning red, and he shoved his hair back from his eyes. “You said I could pick my moment,” he said to me.
“Dude, you’ve had more than thirty years,” I said. “That’s a lot of moments.”
“Oh,” Alona/Lily said suddenly. “He’s in love with Liesel.”
Clearly, this merging had not affected Alona’s mad observation skills. I’d had to have Eric tell me, but she’d pieced it together on her own.
“What?” Liesel shrieked, staring at Eric as if she’d never seen him before.
Eric looked around like he was desperate for escape, but I nodded at him, encouraging.
He coughed, cleared his throat, and then stuffed his hands in the pockets of his powder-blue tux pants. “So, yeah.” He swallowed hard. “I’m in love with you, Liesel. I have been since the day we died.” He paused, shifting his weight nervously. “Actually, before that even,” he added, stammering a little.
“I know that you feel guilty, like we betrayed Claire,” he said. “But the truth is, I never felt that way about her. Not ever.” He reached out and took her hand, turning her to face him. “I swear, I didn’t even know she liked me until after…well, after.” He blushed.
“So, what I’m trying to say is,” he continued, “you might have other reasons for staying here in the in- between, but I stayed, and am
“Oh.” I couldn’t see Liesel’s expression with her back to me, but it sounded like she was crying. “I love you, too,” she said, sniffling. “I just felt so bad because I thought you and Claire—”
“No, never. It’s always been you.”
Then they were kissing each other, with very enthusiastic amounts of tongue, I couldn’t help noticing.
I grimaced and looked away.
“What are they doing?” Alona/Lily whispered.
“Slobbering on each other, mostly.”
She crinkled up her nose in disgust and rolled her eyes at me, which made me laugh. She was still Alona, though maybe a slightly different version. Alona 2.0 or something.
I felt the light before I saw it, the warmth that was somehow…more than anything. It came from above, moving like liquid sunshine, bringing with it that feeling of some unknowable knot on your insides finally relaxing.
It enveloped Liesel and Eric as they were kissing. They didn’t even seem to notice.
Alona/Lily turned slightly to stare in their general direction with undisguised longing and envy. “It’s here, isn’t it? The light?” she asked quietly.
“Yeah,” I said, startled. “You can see it?”
She shook her head. “I can feel it, sort of. Just a change in the room. A warmth.” A tear rolled down her cheek, but I wasn’t sure if she noticed.
The light grew stronger then, the two of them becoming the blindingly bright center until it was so intense, I had to look away.
Then the light began to fade, taking Liesel and Eric with it.
I blinked rapidly, a bright after image of the two of them temporarily burned into my vision.
“You okay?” I asked.
She nodded and wiped her face with her hand.
“We’ll find a way to fix this,” I said, striving to sound confident. “A way for you to go on to the light if you want, and for Lily to stay and still be okay.”
She didn’t look so sure about that, and to be honest, neither was I.
“In the meantime, though, I have something for you.” I bent down and picked up the shoe box I’d brought over.
With a small amount of struggle, she managed to raise the screen.
I handed the box in to her, my fingers brushing hers in the process, and an odd, almost electric, jolt shot through me. It made me want to wrap her hand in mine and hold on. But I resisted.
She looked at the shoe box and then me. “Those are men’s shoes,” she pointed out. “And if this picture is accurate, they’re ugly, too. I mean, tassles, really?”
Ah, some things never change.
“Not that I don’t appreciate the thought,” she added quickly, though it was clear any thought that involved bringing her ugly men’s shoes was really the exact opposite of appreciated.
I sighed. “Just open it, will you?”
“You’re going to have to take these back to the store,” she said, as she removed the lid. “I’d be too
