'We can shorten it,' grinned Rudolph. 'I have pharmacists who can see that his drugs are more than normal strength.'
'That would be excellent, sir. When he is too enfeebled to discharge his duties, there may be an attempt to rake up the affair of the double to discredit you. I could then testify that I was your man all along and that May coerced me.'
They put their heads together, the two saviors of civilization as they knew it, and conspired ingeniously long into the endless night.
THE REVERSIBLE REVOLUTIONS
J. C. BATTLE, late of the Foreign Legion, Red Army, United States Marines, Invincibles De Bolivia and Coldstream Guards, alias Alexandre de Foma, Christopher Jukes, Burton Macauly and Joseph Hagstrom—
ne Etzel Bernstein—put up his hands.
'No tricks,' warned the feminine voice. The ample muzzle of the gun in his back shifted slightly, seemingly from one hand to another. Battle felt his pockets being gone through. 'Look out for the left hip,' he volunteered. 'That gat's on a hair-trigger.'
'Thanks,' said the feminine voice. He felt the little pencilgun being gingerly removed. 'Two Colts,' said the voice admiringly, 'a police .38, three Mills grenades, pencilgun, brass knuckles, truncheons of lead, leather and rubber, one stiletto, tear-gas gun, shells for same, prussic-acid hypo kit, thuggee's braided cord, sleeve Derringer and a box of stink bombs. Well, you walking armory! Is that all?'
'Quite,' said Battle. 'Am I being taken for a ride?' He looked up and down the dark street and saw nothing in the way of accomplices.
'Nope. I may decide to drop you here. But before you find out, suppose you tell me how you got on my trail?' The gun jabbed viciously into his back. 'Talk!' urged the feminine voice nastily.
'How I got on your trail?' exploded Battle. 'Dear lady, I can't see your face, but I assure you that I don't recognize your voice, that I'm not on anybody's trail, that I'm just a soldier of fortune resting up during a slack spell in the trade. And anyway, I don't knock off ladies. We—we have a kind of code.'
'Yeah?' asked the voice skeptically. 'Let's see your left wrist.' Mutely Battle twitched up the cuff and displayed it. Aside from a couple of scars it was fairly ordinary. 'What now?' he asked.
'I'll let you know,' said the voice. Battle's hand was twisted behind his back, and he felt a cold, stinging liquid running over the disputed wrist.
'What the—?' he began impatiently.
'Oh!' ejaculated the voice, aghast. 'I'm sorry! I thought—' The gun relaxed and Battle turned. He could dimly see the girl in the light of the merc lamp far down the deserted street. She appeared to be blushing.
'Here I've gone and taken you apart,' she complained, 'and you're not even from Breen at all! Let me help you.' She began picking up Battle's assorted weapons from the sidewalk where she had deposited them. He stowed them away as she handed them over.
'There,' she said. 'That must be the last of them.'
'The hypo kit,' he reminded her. She was holding it, unconsciously, in her left hand. He hefted the shoulder holster under his coat and grunted. 'That's better,' he said.
'You must think I'm an awful silly,' said the girl shyly.
Battle smiled generously as he caught sight of her face. 'Not at all,' he protested. 'I've made the same mistake myself. Only I've not always caught myself in time to realize it.' This with a tragic frown and sigh.
'Really?' she breathed. 'You must be awfully important —all these guns and things.'
'Tools of the trade,' he said noncommittally. 'My card.' He handed her a simple pasteboard bearing the crest of the United States Marines and the legend:
LIEUTENANT J. C. BATTLE SOLDIER OF FORTUNE REVOLUTIONS A SPECIALTY
She stared, almost breathless. 'How wonderful!' she said.
'In every major insurrection for the past thirty years,' he assured her complacently.
'That must make you—let's see—' she mused.
'Thirty years, did I say?' he quickly interposed. 'I meant twenty. In case you were wondering, I'm just thirty- two years old.' He tweaked his clipped, military moustache.
'Then you were in your first at—'
'Twelve. Twelve and a half, really. Shall we go somewhere for a cup of coffee, Miss—er—ah—?'
'McSweeney,' she said, and added demurely, 'but my friends all call me Spike.'
'China? Dear me, yes! I was with the Eighth Route Army during the celebrated long trek from Annam to Szechuan Province. And I shouldn't call it boasting to admit that without me—'
Miss Spike McSweeney appeared to be hanging on his every word.
'Have you ever,' she asked, 'done any technical work?'
'Engineering? Line of communication? Spike, we fighters leave that to thegreaseballs,' as they are called in most armies. I admit that I fly a combat fighter as well as the next—assuming that he's pretty good—but as far as the engine goes, I let that take care if itself. Why do you ask?'
'Lieutenant,' she said earnestly, 'I think I ought to tell you what all this mess is about.'
'Dear lady,' he said gallantly, 'the soldier does not question his orders.'
'Anyway,' said Miss McSweeney, 'I need your help. It's a plot—a big one. A kind of revolution. You probably know more about them than I do, but this one seems to be the dirtiest trick that was ever contemplated.'
'How big is it?' asked Battle, lighting a cigarette.
'Would you mind not smoking?' asked the girl hastily, shrinking away from the flame. 'Thanks. How big is it? World-scale. A world revolution.
Not from the Right, not from the Left, but, as near as I can make out, from Above.'
'How's that?' asked Battle, startled.
'The leader is what you'd call a scientist-puritan, I guess. His name's Breen—Dr. Malachi Breen, formerly of every important university and lab in the world. And now he's got his own revolution all planned out.
It's for a world without smoking, drinking, swearing, arguing, dancing, movies, music, rich foods, steam heat— all those things.'
'Crackpot!' commented the lieutenant.
She stared at him grimly. 'You wouldn't think so if you knew him,' said Spike. 'I'll tell you what I know. I went to work for him as a stenographer. He has a dummy concern with offices in Rockefeller Plaza and a factory in New Jersey. He's supposed to be manufacturing Pot-O-Klutch, a device to hold pots on the stove in case of an earthquake. With that as a front, he goes on with his planning. He's building machines of some kind in his plant— and with his science and his ambition, once he springs his plans, the world will be at his feet!'
'The field of action,' said Battle thoughtfully, 'would be New Jersey principally. Now, you want me to break this insurrection?
'Of course!' agonized the girl. 'As soon as I found out what it really was, I hurried to escape. But I knew I was being followed by his creatures!'
'Exactly,' said Battle. 'Now, what's in this for me?'
'I don't understand. You mean—?'
'Money,' said Battle. 'The quartermaster's getting shorthanded. Say twenty thousand?'
The girl only stared. 'I haven't any money,' she finally gasped. 'I thought—'
'You thought I was a dilettante?' asked Battle. 'Dear lady, my terms are fifty percent cash, remainder conditional on the success of the campaign. I'm sorry I can't help you—'
'Look out!' screamed the girl. Battle spun around and ducked under the table as a bomb crashed through the window of the coffee shop and exploded in his face.
'Open your eyes, damn you!' growled a voice.
'Stephen—the profanity—' objected another voice mildly.
