of those near-death experiences people reported, when they hovered on the ceiling and gazed down at their own lifeless bodies. She had no idea of the time, no conception of what she might say or do next. It was as if all this were happening to somebody else.
Alan nodded. Again, the hesitant half-smile. ‘I’m back.’
‘Why?’
He took a deep breath. ‘Please let me get it all out in one go. Wait until I’ve finished before you say anything. I haven’t been able to stop loving you, Janey. I tried, but it didn’t work. I’ve no idea how you feel about me, now. I don’t know, maybe you’ve put the past behind you, met someone else and forgotten you even knew me ... but I had to find out. I need to know if you do still care for me. And if you can ever forgive me. I have to know whether there’s a chance for us to carry on as we were before. As husband and wife.’
He looked so unsure of himself, so scared of what she might say. Only sheer desperation had given him the strength to admit his own weakness and declare his feelings for her with such heart-wrenching honesty. And he had always been the stronger partner in the past, thought janey, so seemingly secure and laid-back with his devil-may- care attitudes and freewheeling lifestyle.
But he hadn’t been secure at all, she realized; he had needed her, more than she had ever imagined. He hadn’t abandoned her for another woman, either. Nor had he ever stopped loving her. And now he needed understanding, love and forgiveness in return.
It’s like a dream come true, Janey realized hazily. Tears were beginning to roll down her cheeks and she thought how stupid, to cry now. This is the happiest night of my life.
‘Of course we can carry on,’ she said, rising unsteadily to her feet. The tears fell faster as Alan came towards her, his expression one of joy mingled with relief.
‘You don’t know how much this means to me,’ he murmured, his mouth grazing her wet cheek. ‘I wouldn’t have been able to bear it if you’d said no. The scariest part was not knowing whether you’d met someone else.’
Janey, breathing in the wonderful familiarity of him, closed her eyes. ‘There’s no one else,’
she whispered, stroking his hair and revelling in the sensation of his warm hands against her back. ‘There’s never been anybody else. Only you.’
Chapter 39
‘Oh good!’ said Maxine, when Cindy finally picked up the phone. ‘You’re there.’
‘It’s four o’clock in the morning,’ Cindy replied in arch tones. ‘Of course I’m here. The question is, where are you? More to the point, who is that man lying stark naked in the bed next to you?’
Maxine grinned. ‘That’s two questions.’
‘And that’s no answer,’ said Cindy briskly. ‘Besides, I haven’t finished yet. You were seen tiptoeing away from the party at midnight, sweetie, and that was four long hours ago. The thing is, what on earth could you possibly have been doing since then that’s kept you so busy you couldn’t call your oldest and dearest friend to let her know about it?’
‘Gosh.’ Maxine sounded deeply impressed. ‘You mean you were worried about me?’
‘Worried? Of course I wasn’t worried. I was jealous!’ Abandoning all self-control, Cindy screeched down the phone. ‘So stop buggering about and tell me who he is before I explode!’
‘OK, OK,’ sighed Maxine. ‘His name’s Jim Berenger and he’s an actor. We’re here at his flat in Belsize Park and I just rang to let you know that I’ll be back tomorrow morning. Well, this morning,’ she amended, glancing up at the clock. ‘If you’re good, I’ll give you all the girly gossip then.’
Cindy was still screaming, ‘Oh my God, is he spectacular in bed?’ when Bruno leaned across and seized the phone.
‘Hi,’ he said, lying hack against the pillows and daring Maxine to stop him. ‘Actually, my name is Bruno Parry-Brent; I’m a restaurateur and we’re in my hotel room at the Royal Lancaster. And yes, since you ask, I am most definitely spectacular in b—’
‘Stop it!’ hissed Maxine. Struggling to her knees, she wrenched the receiver back from him and slammed it down, cutting Cindy off in mid-shriek. ‘How could you do that?’
‘Relax darling.’ Effortlessly, Bruno fended her off. ‘We have nothing to hide. We’re going legit.’
‘I don’t want to go legit,’ Maxine howled. ‘This is a one-off, an aberration, a never-to-be-repeated—’
‘It’s been a two-off already,’ Bruno reminded her, his green eyes glittering with amusement as he surveyed her in all her naked glory. ‘Play your cards right and we can make it three.’
‘Bastard.’ She threw a pillow at his head.
‘And it isn’t an aberration, either. I thought it was rather nice.’
‘This is stupid, cried Maxine, wrapping a sheet around herself and debating whether to risk tipping the contents of the ice bucket over him. Somehow, she didn’t quite dare. The prospect of retaliation was too awful. ‘Cindy’s the biggest gossip in the world, she’s got a mouth like a megaphone ... and you think it’s funny!’
‘Not at all. I’m quite serious.’
‘So am I bloody serious.’ Maxine looked fierce. ‘I have a sister who will probably never speak to me again if she ever hears about this. Even more to the point,’ she added heavily, ‘you have Nina.’
Bruno said nothing for a while. No longer smiling, he studied Maxine’s face for several seconds, his own expression oddly intense. Then, reaching out, he traced the line of her cheek with a warm forefinger.
‘I told you I was serious,’ he said eventually. ‘This is it, Max. We were always meant to be together. I love you.’ He paused, then added, ‘I’m going to leave Nina.’
‘Go on,’ persisted Bruno, pinning Maxine down on the bed and expertly avoiding her flailing limbs. ‘Say it. You won’t get any breakfast until you do.’
The tray was outside the door, tantalizingly out of reach. Maxine, who was starving, made another hopeless bid for freedom before falling back, exhausted, against the pillows. She ached too much to put up a decent fight and it was all Bruno’s fault. He was the most insatiable man she had ever known.
‘Say what?’
‘Tell me that you love me.’ He enunciated the words slowly and clearly, as if addressing a dim child. Maxine’s
