British fund manager: should I shoot myself now or wait till after lunch?
Jack
To: Jack Abelhammer
From: Kate Reddy
Rest assured respected fund manager has you constantly in mind. Awaiting interest-rate pronouncement from Al Mighty Greenspan.
Professional opinion: long-term recovery inevitable. Don’t shoot.
Unprofessional opinion: hide under desk till shelling stops, go out and see if any stock left standing. Eat turkey club sandwich. Then shoot.
Katharine xxxxx
To: Kate Reddy
From: Jack Abelhammer
Did you know Alan Greenspan’s wife said he was so oblique that when he asked her to marry him she didn’t even notice? That guy’s harder to read than Thomas Pynchon.
Hey, shouldn’t you be in bed? Middle of the night there, right?
To: Jack Abelhammer
From: Kate Reddy
I like the night. More time in it than the day. Why waste it in bed?
K xxxx
To: Kate Reddy
From: Jack Abelhammer
Bed not invariably a waste of time. Do you know that speech where the guy tells his lover he wishes that seven years were rolled into one night? Must be Shakespeare, right?
To: Jack Abelhammer
From: Kate Reddy
Seven years in one night sounds just about enough hours to pay off my sleep debt. Not Shakespeare. Marlowe, I think. That’s the unfair thing about Shakespeare, though — everything beautiful belongs to him whether he wrote it or not. He’s the Bill Gates of emotional software.
How come you read Marlowe anyway? Did the Wall St J predict a resurgence in Renaissance playwrights?
To: Kate Reddy
From: Jack Abelhammer
Unfair, milady, unfair. Don’t judge a man by his portfolio. Was once a poor struggling English major but had to find a way of financing my first-editions habit. Some men buy boats, I buy a first edition of
To: Jack Abelhammer
From: Kate Reddy
Was once a poor struggling English minor. Poverty, when it’s not being boring, is really quite scary. I didn’t want to be scared all my life. In Britain, there are plenty of people who will tell you money doesn’t matter; these are the people we call the middle classes.
Owning first editions such a boy’s own thing. Respectfully suggest, sir, you should spend your money on something really important, like SHOES.
K xxxxxxxxxxx
To: Kate Reddy
From: Jack Abelhammer
Do you realize you have now sent me exactly 147 kisses and I have not sent you a single one?
To: Jack Abelhammer
From: Kate Reddy
It had crossed my mind.
To: Kate ReddyFrom: Jack Abelhammer
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