It was like robbing a bank and then staying to chat to one of the cashiers.
I nodded at Shinola. “This good mood is just temporary, believe me. You don’t want to go home with us, it’s a traumatic experience.”
“We’ll take our chances.” Shanee suddenly dropped down and stroked Shinola’s cheek. “You’re not going to make a scene on the bus, are you, sweetie?”
“I’ll just be a second,” said Gerri. “I know exactly what I want.”
Amie started looking at the boxers, but Shanee kept talking to Shinola. She undid one of the snaps on her jacket. She picked up the toy Shinola had with her and shook it in front of her face. She said, “I think she wants a cuddle.” She undid the seatbelt and lifted Shinola into the air.
It happened so fast that I couldn’t stop her. One minute Shanee was squatting by the buggy, and the next she was standing on her feet with Shinola in her arms.
The Tazmanian Devil socks fell to the floor.
“What’s that?” said Shanee.
“What’s that?” said the cashiers.
It was lucky I was born to be an actress as well as a mother.
“Oh, my God!” I slapped my hand across my mouth in stunned surprise. “I forgot all about them! Shinola was crying so much – I must’ve dropped them in her blanket when I was trying to quiet her.”
The salesgirls laughed.
“It’s all right,” said the oldest. “You definitely had your hands full.”
Shanee was still talking to Shinola.
“Is this what you’re giving your dad for Christmas? He’s going to love these!”
“Do you want to bring them over to the till?” said the salesgirl.
I wasn’t sure what to do. Tell her right off that I’d changed my mind? Or act like I was going to buy them and then pretend that I’d lost my money?
“You still want them, don’t you?” she pushed.
I could feel everybody looking at me.
“Oh, yes,” I said. “Of course I want them.”
Amie sidled up next to me. “What’s going on?” She gave me a wink. “What’ve you been doing, Lana? Thieving again?”
It was a joke. I knew it was a joke. And everyone else knew it was a joke, too. Only nobody actually laughed.
Shanee thrust the socks at me. Her fingers closed around my hand and squeezed hard.
“Here you go.” She bent down and put Shinola back in her chair. “Let’s get this show on the road.”
I could feel something that wasn’t socks against my palm. I glanced down. There was a twenty-pound note pressed against them.
“It’s lucky you found them,” I said to Shanee.
Shanee nodded. “Yeah,” she said. “I reckon it is.”
Usually the thought of spending an entire day with all my family appealed to me about as much as spending an entire day in a maths class. But I was on my own so much that I was almost looking forward to Christmas. At least it’d be warm – Charlene’s heating wasn’t on a meter, and even if it was she would always have enough money to recharge the key. And there’d be lots of food. And presents. And it was something to wear our new dresses for.
Shinola’s velvet dress was green and mine was red. They both had lacy white collars and cuffs. I even dug out the jewellery kit Hilary gave me one Christmas. I could never be bothered to give it a go, but it was actually pretty good. It had tools, wire, thread, some chains and an assortment of beads. The chains were cheap, but they looked all right from a distance. I shortened one of the gold ones to fit Shinola and I hung a tiny teddy and a star from it. I put the charm Les gave me for Christmas (a teapot this time) on my gold bracelet. So me and Shinola had one image. If we didn’t look like mother and daughter, we did look like elves.
As soon as I walked through the door, Charlene scooped Shinola out of my arms.
“The guest of honour has arrived!” she shouted.
My nan came out of the kitchen like a thief leaving a robbery.
“Give her to me!” she ordered and snatched her away from Charlene before Charlene could argue.
I didn’t have to think about Shinola for the rest of the day. Everyone wanted to hold her and play with her. The kids wanted to feed her. Nan even wanted to change her. You’d think I’d brought the baby Jesus instead of Shinola Spiggs.
There was food all over the place. Crisps and chocolates. Nuts and pretzels. Biscuits and chunks of cheese and olives. My stomach wasn’t growling, it was echoing. I chose a seat where I could reach the nuts and the cheese.
“Here you go,” said Justin.
I looked up to find he was handing me a glass of champagne. I didn’t mean to look at Hilary, but it was sort of an automatic response.
“Well, you’ll want to join in the toast, won’t you?” said my mother.
“OK, now that everybody’s here, it’s music time!” cried Dara, and she raced to the stereo before anyone could beat her to it. “Then we can open our presents.”
“Oh, please,” we all begged. “Not Phil Spector.”
“It isn’t Christmas without the Ronnettes,” said Dara.
“That calls for another round,” said Mick.
Everybody laughed and held out their glasses. Including me.
Everybody made a big deal of the presents from me and Shinola, even though they weren’t much. It was lucky I’d got an extra aftershave for Charley, just in case, since they hadn’t split up this year. The Spiggs always told everybody how I gave her a tin opener for her birthday when I was seven, but even she acted like we’d given her a dream trip to Hawaii this year.
“Why, this is lovely, Lana.” She actually sounded
Shinola got a ton of clothes. Most of it was at least six months too big. So she’d have something to grow into. It was kind of scary that the Spiggs, my nan and my sisters all thought the same like that. She also got a ton of toys. All the stuff from Hilary and Charley and Charlene and Dara was educational. My nan gave her a teddy that was nearly as big as I was.
“Where’s it supposed to sleep?” I asked. “In
“It isn’t easy to be called Mum,” said my nan.
And, except for the quilt Nan made me, all the stuff for me was pretty much for Shinola, too. Charlene and Justin gave me a mobile phone with twenty quid prepaid on it, so I could walk around the flat and talk on the phone at the same time.
“In case there’s some emergency,” said Justin. “You should have a phone nearby at all times.”
“We didn’t even have a phone when I was a girl,” said Nan. “And my mother had seven of us.”
Dara and Mick gave me a subscription to some mother and child magazine and a gift certificate for Mothercare in case there was stuff I needed for Shinola.
“But this is for a hundred pounds!” I knew Mick made a lot of money doing something in the City – and Dara made a lot of money doing something all over the world – but a hundred pounds! They’d never’ve given me that much to spend on myself.
“Babies grow fast,” said Dara. “They always need something.”
Charlene’s kids, Drew and Courtney, gave me a set of
“Wow,” I said. “Just what I always wanted.”
“Try this then, why don’t you?” said my mother. She handed me a long white envelope with a red bow stuck on it.
I took it without much enthusiasm. You can’t fit much in an envelope.
“What is it?”
“That’s the idea of opening it,” said my mother.
