The Eyes Of Kid Midas

'Hey, Bertram,' said Hal, 'don't look now, but I think there's a fish in your pants.'

Bertram then screamed his guts out, because, as everyone knew, Bertram was deathly afraid of live fish, due to some early-childhood trauma. He leapt around like a madman, until finally a small bull-head trout came flopping out the leg of his jeans.

Kevin and Josh were in stitches, but when they finally recovered enough to look at Bertram's face, they realized he had quickly overcome his terror. His fists were clenched, his jaw was clenched, and there was an evil look in his eyes—'the chain-saw look,' as people called it. Bertram left his rock and began to run around the lake toward them, picking up speed like a locomotive. Hal ran around the lake the other way.

The sight of the rapidly approaching chain saw quickly sobered Kevin and Josh. They turned and raced barefoot into the woods.

'Nice going, Kevin,' Josh hissed.

Kevin made it to safety, but Josh, whose feet were more swollen than Kevin's, was snatched by Hal and put into an Extremely Full Nelson.

Kevin hid behind an outcropping of boulders, waiting for an opportunity to spring Josh, and watched as a soaking-wet Bertram came into the clearing.

'You laughed at me?' Bertram screeched into Josh's face like a psychotic drill sergeant.

'No,' said Josh, 'we were laughing with you.'

'You thought that was funny? The thing with the f-f-fish?'

Try as he might, Josh couldn't hold back his smile.

Bertram took Josh's arm and tugged it hard enough to send him sprawling in the dust.

'But what about Midas?' asked Hal.

'One at a time,' said Bertram, flashing his teeth in a wide, crooked smile. 'And I don't care what the teachers do to me, I don't care what my father does to me, and I don't even care if Midas calls out his big sister on me.' Bertram pulled Josh to his feet and began to swing a heavy fist at Josh's nose.

Kevin had to think fast. There had to be a way to get out of this mess. Josh ducked, missing the first punch, but Bertram swung again.

Kevin didn't have time for a brainstorm, so a moderate brain drizzle would have to do. With all of his might he leaned against one of the boulders in front of him, until it crashed to the ground with a thud.

'Avalanche!' said Kevin.

'Huh?'

Bertram and Hal were distracted for only an instant, but that's all it took for Josh to slip away.

Kevin and Josh ran off together, thinking they had made an easy escape.

Then they saw a storm of boulders smashing down the slope toward them.

Suddenly Bertram didn't care about who had been laughing at him. He and Hal took off as the rumble around them grew louder and the boulders pounded closer.

Josh turned to run as fast as his legs could carry him, but Kevin just stood there, like a rabbit frozen on the highway, watching doom approach at sixty miles per hour.

Kevin's particular doom was a boulder twice his size, pounding down the mountain. He watched as it bounced toward him. It flattened a tree stump, then hit a sharp rock and split in two. The boulder parted around Kevin, brushing both his shoulders at the same time.

When Kevin turned, he saw Josh, who looked like a bowling pin with legs as he danced to avoid the stones rolling toward him. When the last of the boulders had passed, Josh breathed a sigh of relief and began screaming at Kevin.

'What's your problem?' yelled Josh. 'Why did you just stand there?'

Kevin felt nothing—not fear, not anger. He felt numb—one hundred percent numb.

He spoke very slowly. 'There was no avalanche, Josh.'

Josh caught his breath and tried to stop shaking. 'What do you call this? A hailstorm?'

'Well, yeah, there was an avalanche,' said Kevin, 'but I mean there wasn't an avalanche when I said there was.'

'Yeah?' said Josh. 'Well, maybe the rocks just fell out of your pinhead!'

The glasses had fallen during the avalanche, and when Kevin picked them up they were hot, as if they had been in the sun too long.

'It's lucky they weren't smashed,' said Kevin.

'It's lucky we weren't smashed,' said Josh, looking around him. 'Let's get out of here. This spot must get avalanches all the time.'

But Kevin knew that wasn't the case.

5 UNMERCIFUL CHOCOLATE DESTRUCTION

The moment the avalanche ended, a storm began brewing in Kevin's mind.

While everyone jabbered on about the avalanche, and while the teachers thanked their Maker that no one was hurt by it, Kevin sat alone on one of the fallen boulders and stared with steely concentration at the mountain. It seemed robbed of its color today, remaining chalky white at sunset. The, glasses, however, burned a silvery orange.

The thoughts swimming in Kevin's mind could have been products of his overactive imagination or the result of a lack of sleep and digestible food, but Kevin had a growing sense that something more was at work here. After the events of this afternoon, he was finding it harder and harder to believe that his glasses had been left behind on the mountain by some ultracool hiker who wanted to stake a claim.

'What would you say, Josh, if I told you that these glasses were magic?' Kevin whispered as he and Josh waited in the long dinner line.

'I would say you've been reading too many comic books.'

The line crept slowly toward Mr. Kirkpatrick, who was dishing up some slop everyone was calling Hamburger Helpless.

'What if I told you I could prove it?' asked Kevin.

'Then I would say the avalanche knocked some of your screws loose.'

Kevin knew that Josh was the kind of kid who wouldn't believe anything until he saw it. So Kevin grabbed his arm and pulled him out of line.

'Hey, what's the idea?' yelled Josh. 'I haven't eaten all day. I'm starved!'

'Follow me. It'll only take a second.' Kevin led Josh off into the woods until the sounds from the campsite were far away, and he was sure no one could hear them.

'Okay,' said Kevin. 'Here's the proof: One, I told Bertram to jump in the lake, and he did.'

'Big deal.'

'Two, I told him to do it again, and he did it again!'

'Big deal.'

'Three, the avalanche. I said there was an avalanche, and then, pow, there was one.'

Josh leaned against a tree, and a look of  began to creep onto his face. 'What you're saying is looney-toons, you know that?'

Kevin took off the glasses and looked at them. Now they had faded to the rich purple of the western sky.

'They tingle, Josh.'

'What?'

'The glasses. They tingle. First, when I told Bertram to jump, and then when I said, 'Avalanche.' They tingled . . . and it sort of felt . . . good.'

Josh reached out his hand. 'Let me see.'