things in this room? I won't deny that it was in my mind that you might be able to take my mind off this awful business with the Toddington twins. You see-' I held up my hand and said gently: 'There's no need for any explanations, Cassie, I am fully aware of the situation. I hope you are not offended but Charles took the liberty of showing me your letter before we left Oxford.' 'Oh no, I'm pleased he informed you of the difficulties facing my dear friend Fanny Braithwaite and myself,' sighed Cassie. 'Perhaps you and Charlie will be able to put your heads together and come up with a solution to our problem.'
I sat down on the bed and declared: 'My God, Cassie, nothing would give us greater pleasure. But we've no experience in financial matters, so I'm not sure what more we can do except give you our moral support. 'But your cousin Charlie is a clever chap,' I went on and proceeded to tell her of the way he cooled tempers of the hot-headed Boer War factions back at 'Varsity. 'So we'll put our heads together and see if we can come up with an idea or two to help you and Fanny resist the pressure to marry these two chaps just for their money.' 'Try your hardest, Henry, we're pinning our hopes on you,' she called out as I blew her a kiss and went through the inter-connecting door straight into my bedroom. I lingered in my warm bath, racking my brains to try and come up with a clever plan to help these two damsels in distress. My father is fond of telling me that the best ideas are the result of one per cent inspiration and ninety nine per cent perspiration, but nothing came to mind by the time I went downstairs for dinner, and I have to confess that I was engrossed in trying to pen down my own concerns with Cassie.
Cassie and her mother were already in the drawing-room when I got down to dinner and Elena greeted me with a warm smile and a glass of champagne. This time I was certain that the tips of her fingers deliberately smoothed themselves around my wrist as she pressed the glass into my hand. However, before either of us could exchange more than a cordial 'good evening', I heard the rustle of skirts behind me and turned round to see Fanny Braithwaite standing at the door.
'Henry, you've yet to meet my dearest friend Fanny Braithwaite,' cried Cassie and she introduced me to an exquisitely pretty girl with golden-blonde hair, large blue eyes and a fine, full figure. 'How do you do, Mr. Dashwood?' she said softly in a sweet feminine voice and as we shook hands. The words of the poet John Gay came instantly came to my mind: 'How happy could I be with either, Were t'other dear charmer away?'
I must readily agree that these unworthy thoughts were of sheer greed, for I was already well set up for the weekend with the lovely Cassandra (and perhaps her Mama as well). So although my prick thickened when my eyes roved over Fanny's luscious bosoms which were spilling over the top of her low cut green gown, I was in a sense relieved when Charles now made his appearance and kissed Fanny lightly on the cheek. 'What a pleasure to see you again, Fanny,' he exclaimed and from the genuine look of delight on her face, it was obvious that these two were already, shall we say, very well acquainted! And I had thought Charles to be an innocent these matters!' Charles and I entertained the ladies with some amusing anecdotes about our first week at Brasenose College and then Polgrave came in to announce that dinner was served and Elena led us into the dining room. Although the Morley family might be experiencing some financial problems, this has not prevented Elena from instructing her excellent cook, to prepare a feast for us. We dined on caviare, asparagus soup, fillets of sole in white wine, roast lamb served with several vegetables and roast potatoes followed by several varieties of fresh fruits, all washed down with vintage wines. Charles and I stood up when the three ladies retired and Polgrave brought in a decanter of port from which Charles filled our glasses. 'Enjoying yourself, Henry?' he asked with a beaming smile upon his slightly flushed face, for Charles had been imbibing at a greater rate than myself. 'Aren't the girls absolute smashers?' 'Without a doubt, old boy,' I replied and rather daringly went on: 'And I hope you will not take offence if I say that your Aunt Elena is also a damned attractive woman.' 'I couldn't agree more,' Charles grunted as he sipped his port. 'Do you remember that I told you she was rumoured to have been fucked by His Majesty the King when he visited Morley Hall eighteen months ago? Well, I gave Polgrave half a crown whilst you were upstairs with Cassie and he swore to me that he heard a noise coming from Edward's bedroom in the early hours and he peeped through the keyhole and saw Aunt Elena lying naked on the bed sucking the royal shaft.' 'Oh my word,' I murmured, feeling upset that I had unwittingly steered the conversation upon delicate ground. 'I'm sorry, I didn't mean to rake up any embarrassing family scandals.'
Charles let out a throaty chuckle and said: 'My dear chap, think nothing of it, Cassie knows of the matter and it's all water under the bridge as far as Uncle Roger is concerned. Between ourselves, he wasn't put out because- now how shall I put it-although he and Elena are the very best of friends, some time ago Uncle Roger admitted to me that unfortunately he has been unable to satisfy Aunt Elena in the bedroom – or anywhere else, come to think of it! No, it's not that he's impotent,' he went on when he saw my eyebrows shoot up. “The problem hasn't been so much about his not being able to manage a stand. It's just that Uncle Roger is rather the other way inclined and has his own set of lovers. Meanwhile, Aunt Elena would like to be shafted morning, noon and night.' So I had not imagined the signals which the good-looking lady had been giving me! 'What are you smiling about?' asked Charles curiously. Then he snapped his fingers and snorted: 'Oh-ho, has my naughty aunt been giving you the eye? Well, it would be surprising if she didn't make a pass at you, Henry, because I doubt if Aunt Elena has sheathed a beefy young prick in her snatch since Nathan, the gardener's boy, left Morley Hall last July.' 'Has there been no-one else available to satisfy her needs?' I enquired. Charles shook his head and answered: 'Not really.
You see, she considers that it would be rather infra dig to let herself be shagged by one of the house servants and in any case, Polgrave is also of the homosexualist persuasion. So feel quite free to fuck my aunt tonight, you'd be doing both Elena and Uncle Roger a favour if you'd give her a good poke. Cassie knows about the way her mother deals with her unsatisfied needs, in case you're bothered.'
I grinned weakly at him and muttered that I would do my utmost to oblige the lady. I did not inform Charles that his pretty cousin expected me to return to her room later to continue our sensuous joust. Still, I would have to cross this bridge when I came to it. I downed my glass of fine, full-bodied port with a flourish. 'No, no, another will send me to sleep,' I said hastily as Charles offered me the decanter. 'Shall we join the ladies?' He refilled his own glass and swiftly swallowed down another large port. Then he rose slightly unsteadily from the table and said: 'By all means, let's see what the three of them are up to in the drawing-room. But keep your hands off the fair Fanny, old bean, she and I have an understanding, if you follow my drift.' 'I understand perfectly,' I replied and added with total sincerity: 'I assure you that I'll be busy enough without making a play for your girl.' We walked through to the drawing-room where the ladies were engaged in a game of Table Curling, a new table game Aunt Elena purchased from sclfridgcs on her last trip to London, which is played on a specially marked board with miniature hardwood 'stones'. At the ladies' request, Charles and I joined in but after about half an hour, Cassandra gently nudged me under the table and then said: 'Would you all forgive me, but I have a headache coming on and I need to go upstairs and lie down. I find that only resting in a darkened room brings relief – but I don't want to break up the party so please promise you'll continue your game. Henry, do you play bridge? Yes? Then let me say that Fanny is the most talented player in this company. She is always sought after as a partner at house parties.' 'And not only for card games, I'll be bound,' I said gallantly. 'In the meantime, may I escort you to your room, Cassandra?' 'Thank you, Henry,' she replied, placing her arm in mine and we moved towards the door. 'If this headache passes in the next hour or so, I'll be down again in about an hour. But if not, may I wish everyone a very good night and I'll see you all again in the morning.' Elena, Fanny and Charles chorused their best wishes for Cassie's speedy recovery and as we climbed the stairs she told me that Fanny was staying the night at Morley Hall. 'She's in the bedroom across the hall from Charlie's so don't be alarmed if you hear the creak of floorboards during the wee small hours!' she remarked as we reached her door. 'I'll remember that,' I said, kissing her lightly on the forehead. 'And I wish your headache better.'
Cassie looked at me and giggled: 'Silly boy! I don't have a headache. But this gives me an opportunity to break up the party for Fanny and Charlie. With that pair, I don't know who is the more keen to get their hands on each other! Out of politeness, they'll play at most two rubbers of bridge and then Fanny will yawn, say she is feeling tired as will you and Charlie. This will bring the evening to a close nice and early, so Fanny and I can enjoy the luxury of a nice unhurried night of love-making. 'We worked out this strategy when Mama went out of the drawing- room for five minutes whilst you and Charlie were polishing off your port.' 'You clever girl,' I said admiringly. 'I'll be back as soon as possible.' 'Good, I'll be waiting for you,' she said, pursing her lips to blow me a kiss as she pushed down her doorhandle. 'Don't forget, you can use the connecting door so it won't be necessary to go out again onto the landing.'
'I'll be as quick as I can,' I promised as I waved goodbye and took the opportunity of relieving my bladder in the guests' W.C. before I hurried back down the stairs to rejoin the others. By the time I returned, Polgrave had set up the bridge table over which he had placed a linen tablecloth as the baize needed repairing.
Someone had thoughtlessly let his cigar burn a large hole in the fine green baize. We cut the cards and I
