?Now what?s all this about? And why did Vanessa tell me not to put through any calls from you??
I breathe a sigh of relief?at least it was Vanessa and not David refusing to talk to me. But it confirms my suspicions: it?s definitely the same Vanessa.
?David?s in trouble, big trouble,? I say wearily. ?It?s partly my fault, but mainly Vanessa?s.? This may not be the absolute truth, but there?s no point in making Jane cross with me now, is there? And it is more Vanessa?s fault than mine. I mean, she actually meant to be bad, whereas I was duped into it.
?Go on.? Jane looks at me expectantly.
?I?ve got some stuff here?a disk and some papers?that will make everything okay, but he needs to get it soon. Like now, in the next hour. And Vanessa can?t know about it. If she does, she?ll ruin everything. She?s totally betrayed him.?
I add this last piece of information with a flourish, knowing that it will get Jane fired up. If she didn?t like Vanessa before, now she positively hates her.
?Georgie, are you telling me that one of the partners in the firm is acting unprofessionally? These are very serious allegations.?
?I know. But she is. She?s running off to Spain this evening. She?s a complete cow.?
For a minute I?m scared that Jane is going to tell me to stop wasting her time. That she doesn?t believe me. But then she looks up at me and opens her handbag.
?Is that the information there?? Jane looks at the envelope I?m clutching.
?Yes. Look, you?ve got to get this to David safely.?
?Of course. Now, Georgie, I recommend you go home now and have a bath. You look dreadful.?
?Do you think David will be okay??
?If what you say is true and the information here is what you say it is, then I?m sure he?ll be fine.?
I nod silently. I need some words of reassurance. I can take David hating me, but I can?t take the possibility of his career being ruined. It would just be too unfair.
Jane picks up the envelope and puts it in her handbag. ?Look, my dear, he?ll come round. They always do, just you see.?
She thinks this is still about me and David, I realize. She thinks I?m worried he won?t love me anymore. Of course I am worried about that?I could well have messed things up completely on the romantic front. But something tells me that we couldn?t have carried on as we were anyway. There were too many secrets. Candy, Mike, David?they all knew more about what was going on than I did. Well, I don?t want to be protected anymore. I don?t want to be the naive, trusting Georgie. If David had been open with me from the start with the whole Mike business, I?d never have believed Mike?s lies. If Candy had been honest about her feelings for Mike, I?d have left them to it and saved myself a whole load of heartache. I do love David, but I?m not sure that?s enough right now.
?Just you remember what I said about a holiday,? Jane is saying. ?Looks like you could do with one, too.?
She nods at me and leaves. I look at the time?it?s still early, and I?ve got an idea. I do some mental calculations, and walk quickly toward the Tube.
?You really want it all off??
?Yes, really.?
My hairdresser, Adrian, looks at me uncertainly. ?How about a bob?? he suggests, but I shake my head.
?I want a crop,? I tell him matter-of-factly. ?I want to look utterly and completely different.?
At this, Adrian?s face breaks into a smile. ?One of those transformation cuts, you mean? Well, in that case, I?d say we need to do a bit of color, too, don?t you think??
I nod gratefully and let him lead me to the basin to have my hair washed. David may have liked my hair long, but I?m not doing this for David. I?m doing this for me. I want a new start.
As Adrian talks to me about the flat he?s just bought with his boyfriend and the cost of furniture, I watch my appearance change. First, he divides my hair into sections, paints them with dye, and wraps each one up in tin foil. Next, when the foils have been taken out, he cuts away at my hair with scissors, inches of hair cascading onto the floor. There?s no going back now, I think to myself, and a big grin appears on my face.
An hour and a half after I first sat down, I am staring at myself appraisingly. I have short hair, with a teeny tiny fringe that virtually disappears when I put it to one side, and beautiful golden highlights that seem to make my skin glow.
I suddenly understand what Audrey Hepburn was doing inRoman Holiday . The film wasn?t about romance or about driving around in Vespas. It was about someone growing up. She needed to cut her hair to say good-bye to the girl who took orders and did what she was told. She didn?t turn her back on her responsibilities, but she changed the way she accepted them. After her weekend in Rome she was an adult who did things on her terms.
The girl looking back at me in the mirror isn?t the same Georgie who thought having Mike fancy her again would solve everything. Who expected Mike or David to provide her with everything, from a social life to financial status. No, the Georgie I?m looking at now is the same one I saw in Gucci. Except this time the transformation wasn?t quite so expensive.
I wince slightly when I think about my credit card bill, but then think what the hell?a few less cab rides and a ban on cappuccinos, and I?ll pay it off. The point is that in spite of everything, I feel good about myself. I finally feel like I?m in charge.
Adrian brings a mirror over so I can see the back.
?You know, I thought it?d be a mistake you going short,? he says. ?But you look gorgeous. Like a little urchin. Now you go and show him what he?s missing, whoever he is.?
I want to tell him that there?s no ?he? to miss anything anymore, but there doesn?t seem any point really. I like my hair. And that?s enough.
