To America. To go on together. To try a bit longer. I didn't really know which I wanted: to clear out, cut loose, divorce, start again, remarry, have children, or to make what one might of the old dead love, to pour commitment into the shaky foundations, to rebuild them solid.
It was Sarah, I thought, who would have to decide.
'Do you want us to stay together?' I asked.
'You've thought of divorce?'
'Haven't you?'
'Yes.' I heard her sigh. 'Often, lately.'
'It's pretty final, being divorced,' I said.
'What then?'
'Wait a bit,' I said slowly. 'See how we go. See what we both really want. Keep on talking.'
'All right,' she said. 'That'll do.'
INTERVAL
Letter from Vince Akkerton to Jonathan Derry.
Angel Kitchens,
Newmarket.
July 12th
Dear Mr Derry,
You remember you were asking about Chris Norwood, that day back in May? I don't know if you're still interested in those computer tapes you were talking about, but they've turned up here at the Kitchens. We were clearing out the room we change from outdoor clothes in, prior to it being repainted, you see, and there was this bag there that everyone said didn't belong to them. So I looked in it, and there were a lot of old papers of writing and three cassettes. I thought I'd give them a run on my cassette player, because they didn't have any labels on saying what was on them, but all that came out was a screeching noise. Well, a mate of mine who heard it said don't throw them away, because I was going to, that's computer noise, he said. So I took the tapes in to Janet to see what she could make of them, but she said the firm has got rid of their old computer, it wasn't big enough for all it was having to do, and they've now got a company computer or something with disc drives, she says, and it doesn't use cassettes.
So, anyway, I remembered about you all of a sudden, and I found I'd still got your address, so I thought I'd ask you if you thought this was what you were talking about. I threw the pages of writing into the rubbish, and that's that, they're gone, but if you want these tapes, you send me a tenner for my trouble and you can have them.
Yours truly, Vince Akkerton
Letter from the executors of Mrs Maureen O'Rorke to Jonathan Derry.
September 1st
Dear Sir,
We are returning the note you wrote to Mrs O'Rorke, together with your enclosure of three cassettes.
Unfortunately Mrs O'Rorke had died peacefully in her sleep at home three days before your gift was posted. In our opinion, therefore, the contents of the package should be regarded as belonging to yourself, and we herewith return them. We are,
Yours faithfully, Jones, Pearce and Block, Solicitors
Letter from the University of Eastern California selection board to Jonathan Derry.
London
October 20th
Dear Mr Derry,
Subsequent to your interview in London last week, we have pleasure in offering you a three-year teaching post in the Department of Physics. Your salary for the first year will be Scale B (attached) to be reviewed thereafter. One full semester's notice to be given in writing on either side.
We understand that you will be free to take up the post on January 1st next, and we await your confirmation that you accept this offer.
Further details and instructions will be sent to you upon receipt of your acceptance.
Welcome to the University!
Lance K. Barowska, D.Sc.
Director of Selections,
Science Faculty,
University of Eastern California
Letter from Harry Gilbert to Marty Goldman Ltd, Turf Accountants.
October 15th
Dear Marty,
In view of what has happened, I'm asking you to release me from the transfer that we had agreed. I haven't the heart, old friend, to build any more kingdoms. With Angelo jailed for life, there's no point in me buying all your betting shops. You knew, of course, that they were for him – for him to manage, anyway.
I know you had some other offers, so I hope you won't be coming after me for compensation.
Your old friend, Harry
Excerpt from a private letter from the Governor of Albany Prison, Parkhurst, Isle of Wight to his friend the Governor of Wakefield Prison, Yorkshire.
Well, Frank, we're letting Angelo Gilbert out on parole this week, and I wish between you and me that I felt better about it. I'd like to have advised against it, but he's served fourteen years and there's been a lot of pressure from the Reformers group on the Home Sec. to release him. It's not that Gilbert's actively violent or even hostile, but he's been trying hard to get this parole so for the last two years there's been no breath of trouble.
But as you know with some of them they're never stable however meek they look, and I've a feeling Gilbert's like that. You remember, when you had him about five years ago, you felt just the same. It isn't on the cards, I suppose, to keep him locked up for life, but I just hope to God he doesn't go straight out and shoot the first person who crosses him.
See you soon Frank, Donald
Part Two – WILLIAM
CHAPTER 12
I put my hand on Cassie's breast, and she said 'No, William. No.'
'Why not?' I said.
'Because it's never good for me, twice, so soon. You know that.'
'Come on,' I said.
'No.'
'You're lazy,' I said.
'And you're greedy.' She picked my hand off and gave it back to me.
I replaced it. 'At least, let me hold you,' I said.
'No.' She threw my hand off again. 'With you, one thing leads to another. I'm going to get some orange juice and run the bath, and if you're not careful, you'll be late.'
I rolled onto my back and watched her walk about the bedroom, a tall thin girl with too few curves and very long feet. Seen like that in all her angular nakedness, she still had the self-possessed quality which had first attracted me: a natural apartness, a lack of cling. Her self-doubts, if any, were well hidden, even from me. She went downstairs and came back carrying two glasses of orange.
