Butchers Hill

'Who?'

'The women who walk, the lost souls of Baltimore, the ones who talk to themselves and wander through the city. I see them on buses, down in the harbor, even up at the Rotunda shopping center. Some of them panhandle, some don't. Not that long ago, I used to worry I was going to become one of them.'

'Bullshit,' Jackie said softly.

'What?'

'I said bullshit. You were never really in danger of falling through the cracks like that. You have parents, family. There was always someone to catch you if you really fell.'

Tess wanted to argue, but Jackie was right, she had caught her in her lie as surely as she had caught the woman with the stroller. Oh, she might have felt as if she were scraping bottom at times, but there had always been family to help her out. When she had lost her job, Aunt Kitty and Uncle Donald had rallied, finding work for her. And if she hadn't been so proud, her father would have squeezed her on the city payroll somehow.

'You're right, I was being glib. I always had support. I guess you really didn't.'

'I had one person. Now I don't have anyone. I'm all I have.'

Tess wanted to contradict her, say something soothing, but what was there to say in all honesty? Her mother was dead, her daughter was someone else's daughter. Jackie Weir was about as alone as anyone could be in this world.

Chapter 17

Tess yearned to go straight to Tyner's office the next morning, but it was her turn to take Gramma Weinstein to the hairdresser, one of Gramma's many codependent rituals. Unlike some older folks, who clung to the steering wheel long past the point of prudence, Gramma had announced on her sixtieth birthday that she would not drive any more. She had taken it for granted that her husband and, after his death, her children and grandchildren, would gladly pick up the chauffeuring duties.

But the rotation, as maintained by Gramma, was far from foolproof. Today, as Tess pulled into the parking lot behind Gramma's apartment building, she saw her mother getting out of her blue Saturn.

'Free at last,' she said to herself. Now she could check in with Tyner, find out where things stood with Beale. But something in her mother's face kept her from throwing her car into reverse and peeling out of the parking lot. The tense lines on either side of her mouth, the anxious look in her eyes. She reminded Tess of herself, on her way to visit Judith.

'Hey, Mom. Looks like Gramma double-scheduled again. I thought it was my turn.'

'Great. I had to take a personal day to get the morning off. Unlike you, I can't make my own hours. The federal government isn't quite so flexible.'

'Nor is the state government, yet here comes Uncle Donald. Triple-teaming-that's a new one even for Gramma. Is she getting senile, or does she just not care what else we do with our lives?'

'Don't be disrespectful of your grandmother,' Judith said automatically. 'She won't be with us much longer.'

'You wish,' Tess said, and her mother looked stricken. By the joke, or the reality behind it? Impossible to tell.

Uncle Donald strolled up, whistling a show tune, 'Younger Than Springtime.' He was Gramma's favorite, if only because he had never married and his loyalties were clear. Even his fall from political grace, in the scandal that had sent his senator boss to prison, hadn't shaken Gramma's affection for him.

'Good morning, Sis, Tesser. How do you want to resolve this? We can toss a coin, or cut a deck of cards that I happen to have in my car. High card wins. Loser takes her to the Beauty Palace.'

'I'll do it,' Judith said. 'I took the day off, I might as well.'

A reprieve, Tess thought. Yet when she looked at her mother's dutiful, unhappy face, she couldn't just walk away.

'Let's all go. Make it a family outing. My mom and my favorite uncle. And Gramma,' she added, when Judith gave her another look. 'We could go to S'n'H afterwards, like we used to do with Poppa.'

'Why not?' Uncle Donald replied.

'Why not?' Judith echoed weakly, but she looked as if she might have several reasons.

The Pikesville Beauty Palace sat in an old shopping center on Reisterstown Road, near the synagogues that had been built as Baltimore's Jewish families began moving to the north and west. Although the neighborhood was less and less safe as time went on, the Beauty Palace had scores of loyal customers like Gramma, who wouldn't dream of going anywhere else for their weekly sets and periodic root touchups.

'Mrs. Weinstein!' the receptionist said with the chirpy insincerity common to those who dealt with Gramma. 'We're all ready to take you back to the shampoo girl.'

'You didn't give me one of those Russians, did you? I hate it when they talk that gibberish around me.'

'We have you with Lisa today.'

'I've never had her. Isn't she the one who snaps her gum?'

'She won't,' the receptionist said, her smile becoming more and more of an effort. 'I'll speak to her about it.'

'Why can't I have Wanda?'

'She's with another customer.'

'Then put me with Francie. I always liked her.'

'She left to work at a salon in Mount Washington.'

'Probably running for her life,' Tess said under her breath.

'Don't mutter,' Gramma said. 'If you have something to say, say it.'

'Be nice, everyone,' Judith pleaded. A whistling Uncle Donald wandered away, as if he didn't know this trio of querulous women, and developed a sudden fascination with the hair accessories in the display case by the front door.

'Let's just forget the whole thing,' Gramma said suddenly. 'I don't like the idea of someone new touching my head.'

'But you've had Lisa,' the receptionist said, a little desperately.

'Put me down for next Wednesday. And make a note: no Russians, no strangers, no gum-snappers. I want Wanda, you understand. Wanda for shampoo, Michael for my set. Donald, bring the car around. We'll just have an earlier lunch than we planned at S'n'H.'

Uncle Donald jumped, as if he were a twelve-year-old boy again. Judith smiled feebly at the glaring receptionist, while Tess stared at the ceiling. One big happy, she thought.

Even with Gramma along, it was nice to be back at S'n'H, as the old-timers all referred to the Suburban House restaurant. S'n'H was a sanctuary, a windowless, timeless place with desserts to die for and placemats with supposed-to-be-funny Yiddish translations. Oivay, for example, was translated as April fifteen, a bris was 'getting tipped off,' and a goy was defined as one who buys retail.

Her breakfast long forgotten, Tess ordered chicken noodle soup with kreplach. ('Kosher-style ravioli,' according to the menu.) Gramma decided on a potato pancake, while Uncle Donald chose cheese blintzes and a side order of herring. Judith wanted nothing more than an iced tea.

'That's right, Judith,' Gramma said approvingly. 'You'll keep your figure.'

That was the cue for Uncle Donald, who acted as the peacemaker in those rare moments he realized there was peace to be made. 'Has your lawyer finalized the division of that property yet, Mama? If you have any trouble with any of the government agencies involved, you just let me know.'

'Not to worry, it's almost done. I'm having a crab feast next Wednesday night and we'll have a little celebration then, sign all the papers together.' Even kosher Jews ate crabs in Baltimore, as if there were some unwritten exemption in the dietary laws. 'That's why it's important for me to go back to the beauty parlor before then. Can you take me next week, Donald? I know how hard it is for you to get away from work.' Not for Judith,