'She is beautiful,' I said to Caroline, 'do you know who she is?'
Jenny's voice sounded behind us. 'What are you doing?' she asked in a sharp tone. A tone that scratched.
'I was asking,' I answered.
Caroline moved. Her palm was moist in mine. 'I know her. She is Katherine Hayton-an actress. We have seen her at the Adelphi,' she said. Her eyes were saucers as she received Jenny's stare.
'You were not told to hold hands,' Jenny said. She jerked her head at me and said, 'Come. Beatrice, come.'
Forlorn, I relinquished Caroline's hand. Our own house was yet an ocean away. In the bedrooms women with bronzed skins and supple hips were lying. They would wear my clothes and steal my jewellery.
Jenny led me down the hall. To my astonishment we entered the linen room. It smelled of starch and nothing. 'You must learnyou must both learn, Beatrice. Do you not know?' Jenny asked me.
I blinked. I did not know who I was. Father had lied perhaps. He had not gone to Madras. He was with the women in the rooms. They would French-drink. Their lips would taste of curry. 'there would be musk between their thighs. I said yes to Jenny. My voice said yes. My hands were at my sides. 'Kneel before me, Beatrice.'
I did. My head was bowed, my hands clasped together. I prayed for goodness. Edward's mother used to undress with her door half open. We could see her as we went past. Her bottom was big. I told Edward that she should close the door. He smiled. His eyes were small and neat. Like his pine when it was not stiff.
'Kiss my thighs,' Jenny said. She raised her skirt, gathering up the folds. I was blind. A milkiness, a perfume. Her drawers were split both back and front. It was the fashion then. Women could attend to their natural functions without removing them. In my mother's early days women had never worn drawers.
The curls of her slit, her loveslot, honeypot, were framed by the white linen. My palms sought the backs of her thighs. Her knees bent slightly. I could feel her smile. My tongue licked out, sweeping around the taut tight tops of her black/stockings. Her skin-white like my white. She tasted of musk and perfume and the scents of flowers. My lips splurged against her thighs.
'Ah, you lick! Like a little doggy you lick,' Jenny laughed. After a moment or two she pushed me away with her knees. 'It is too soon,' she said. 1 wanted to cry but she would not let me. I was brought to my feet even as the door opened and Jenny rearranged her dress. My aunt led Caroline in and frowned a little at Jenny, as I thought. The window of the linen room was set high up at the other end from us. The light was morning soft. Caroline wore, as I did, a woollen dress of fine skein.
'You will see to them, Jenny,' my aunt said. From our distance I heard my uncle and Katherine enter the house. There was a tinkling of glasses, laughter. The door closed, leaving the three of us alone.
'Remove your dresses,' Jenny said. My hands went to the buttons of mine, but Caroline hesitated. Jenny smacked her and she squealed. 'Quickly!' Jenny snapped. We stood naked except for our stockings and boots.
Jenny drew us together, face to face, thighs to thighs. From a drawer she took cords and bound us tightly together -ankles, thighs, waists. We could not move. Our cheeks pressed close. Placing her hands beneath Caroline's bottom she urged us slowly into a corner. I stood with my back to the meeting of the walls. Caroline's breach flowed over my breath.
'Your bodies merge well together,' Jenny said, 'are your breasts touching fully? Move your breasts. Your nipples must touch.'
Yes, I said, yes Jenny. Our nipples were like bell-pushes together. Mine grew and tingled. Caroline's grew. Her toes curled over mine.
'Please, don't,' Caroline whispered. 1 knew that she wasn't speaking to me but in her mind speaking. I moved my lips against her ear. Jenny had gone.
'You like it,' I said. I wanted to make her happy. I coaxed her. She had had the cane. Was it nice? 'Do you like it?' I asked. I made my voice sound as if we were going on a holiday. If she liked it we would be happy.
'I don't know,' Caroline said. Her voice was smudged. Our bellies were silky together. I could feel her slit warm, pulsing. It was nice standing still. I moved my mouth very slowly from her ear to her cheek. I felt her quiver. Had she sucked his cock? I would not ask yet. I would ask later. The tip of my tongue traced the fullness of her lower lip, the Cupid curve. Caroline moved her face away. Her cheeks homed. Our nipples were thorns, entangled. 'Do not!' she choked.
'Jenny will come,' I said. Caroline moved her mouth back to mine. The bulbous fullness of her breasts against mine excited me. Our mouths were soft in their seeking. I sought her tongue with my tongue. It retreated, curling in its cave curling. Sipping at her lips I brought it to emerge. The thrill made us quiver. Our nipples moved, implored. My belly pressed in tighter to hers. The door swung open of a sudden. It was Jenny. She scolded us and said we had been kissing. Working her hand between us she felt our lovemouths, secretive between our thighs. They were moist. Her hand retracted. Her fingers sought our bottoms.
'You must practise-you love one another. Caroline -put your tongue in her mouth.'
We swayed. Caroline's tongue was small, urgent, pointed in its bickering. Hidden by our lips our tongues licked. It was a secret. I wanted.
'Open your mouths-let me see your tongues,' Jenny commanded. We obeyed.
'Half an hour,' Jenny said. She moved to the door and we were alone again. Birds sprinkled their songs among the leaves outside. I was happy. The richness of our bodies flesh to flesh was sweet. Caroline's eyelashes fluttered and tickled against mine. I could feel her belly rippling.
Our tongues like warm snakes worked together. Our thighs trembled. The ridged tops of our stockings rubbed.
Perhaps the door would remain closed forever.
Our minds whispered together like people in caves.
SEVEN
We would go to meadows, my aunt said. She saw my look of incomprehension. We had been released exactly upon the half hour. Dressed again we sat in the garden and drank champagne and lemonade. It was a reward, Jenny said, because we had not cried or protested when she untied us and made us dress again.
'Meadows-it is a country house your uncle has bought,' Aunt Maude explained.
'We may go indoors first?' I asked. I was referring to our own house. My aunt nodded as if surprised at the question.
'Do not tarry-we leave at noon,' she told us.
Jenny accompanied us into our house. She was pleased and curious, I believe, to see it again. When I began to assemble clothes she stopped me. 'Not that many, Beatrice. Simple dresses only. Be sure to include your riding attire.'
I took but one trunk, as did Caroline. A sense of curious excitement seized me. The years rolled back. We were children again preparing for a holiday. We would paddle in the sea or descend from bathing huts whose steps led down into the water and were drawn there by ponies. Ladies were not permitted to expose themselves on the beach, though men could bathe naked so long as they were a far distance from the females.
Unseen by Jenny 1 took a bottle of liqueur and secreted it. I whispered to Caroline to do the same. She shook her head. Munching a biscuit we waited upon Jenny to conclude her discreet inspection of the house. When she came down she was wearing an ornate hat that Mother had left behind.
'May I have this?' Jenny asked. 1 do not know why she asked. Perhaps it was to test me. I said no. Not put out, she handed it to the maid and asked her to return it upstairs. 'We shall have fun,' she said and led us out.
In the roadway stood a large six-sealer carriage of a kind not too often seen outside of London or the larger market towns. We ensconced ourselves. The manservant who had accompanied Katherine placed our trunks on top, protected by a guard rail. Our aunt joined us, then my uncle and Katherine. She had changed into a riding outfit with a three-cornered hat-a small one that perched attractively on her hair. She smiled at us with the distant smile of a stranger. The coach, led by four horses, started with a long cracking of a whip. The manservant whose name was Frederick sat up beside the coachman. It was a long and sultry run. I think he enjoyed it little. Katherine toyed with her crop frequently and once or twice teased it playfully about my uncle's thighs. He gained a considerable
