you’re going to right. If you can’t do it, if you can’t stop those who are hurting your people, then you might as well stop the rest of this charade. Go out there and tell those people you can’t do anything for them, that you can’t feed them or protect them because they aren’t your kind and aren’t worth bloodying your hands for!”
He was shouting now, breathing heavily. I stared at him, eyes wide, filled with a little of that fear I always got when his temper rose. Moments like these reminded me of just how powerful Dorian was physically and magically. His lazy, lean appearance was deceptive; I’d seen him fight. Between that and the power he wielded, I hoped there would never come a day when we were truly antagonists. Outside, I heard thunder again.
It took me several seconds to muster an answer, and when I spoke, my voice was very small.
“I can’t,” I said. “I can’t tell them that.”
“I know you can’t,” he whispered.
And then, still gripping me, he leaned down and kissed me. More astonishingly, I kissed him back. It seemed like all the emotions that had consumed me recently-all the rage and confusion-were poured into that kiss. My teeth bit against his lips, and when he shoved me against the wall, I welcomed the brief pain. Our hands were all over each other as we kissed, mine running the length of his body while his more aggressively hiked up the dress I’d earlier regretted wearing. In a matter of seconds, it was pushed over my hips, leaving my legs bare. With one hand still holding the skirt up, his other pushed between my thighs, slipping underneath the thong I’d put on this morning in the hopes of getting intimate with Kiyo.
Those clever fingers slid into me, stoking a wetness I hadn’t thought could come on so fast. My small exclamation was muffled in his crushing kiss as he alternately thrust his fingers into me and pulled out to tease and dance with my clit. It was the latter he eventually settled on, circling and stroking as heat built between my legs and made all my muscles tense up. Then, the burning flood of sensation exploded, and I came with another cry that his kiss smothered, a cry that faded into a moan as my body trembled and spasmed from the shock waves of heat and electricity still shooting through me from his touch.
My orgasm created no pause in the action, though. The hand that had just brought me such pleasure moved from between my legs to his pants as he began to unfasten them. His mouth finally left mine, moving on to my neck, his kisses hot and fierce. He shoved his pants down, and I felt him against me, hard and ready as he pressed his hips to mine. My hands were tangled in his hair as I tilted my head back to receive his kisses, but his hands, busy as always, were prying off my underwear. The reality of what was happening sank in.
“Wait…” I murmured, lost as his mouth bit against my skin. “No, we can’t…I can’t…”
“You can,” he breathed in my ear. “Let me…let me do it. Let me bury myself in you. Let me spread your legs and take you like I did before. We are gods in this world, Eugenie, with no other lovers who are our equals. No others who are worthy of this joining.” The thong was on the ground now, and I could feel his erection pressed against my skin, so, so close to sliding in and doing all the things he promised. He rested his hands under my thighs and hoisted me up against the wall so that my legs wrapped around his hips.
“Dorian…” I gasped. “I’m with Kiyo….”
“So? You’re a queen. Do you think you can’t have as many lovers as you like?”
“It’s…it’s wrong. We can’t…”
“We can,” he said, voice low and full of promise. “And when we do, this land will be reborn….”
Afterward, I would never be entirely sure if I would have let him do it. I like to think I would have stopped him. I was in love with Kiyo, after all, and loyal to him. Surely I would have said no and shoved Dorian aside. I wasn’t in love with him…or was I? In those moments before we’d kissed, I’d felt like he truly got me and understood the things in my head. I think I’d probably loved him since around the time we’d met; I certainly never lost the attraction. Still, that didn’t make cheating on Kiyo right.
Whatever decision I would have made was taken from me when there was a knock at the door.
I jerked away from Dorian and hastily shoved my skirt down. He more casually turned away to pull his pants back up, seeming in no particular hurry. The door opened, and the lead councilwoman stuck her head in. Even with Dorian’s back to her and me dressed, it had to have been obvious what was going on-particularly with my underwear on the floor. If she found it shocking, though, she didn’t show it, and I recalled how free the gentry were in public.
“Your majesties,” she said politely, “there’s a storm coming in, and the workers were wondering what the Oak King wanted to do.”
Dorian, decent once more, turned around and gave her a laconic, charming smile. “A storm? Really? How truly unexpected. Well, tell them to bring as much of the ore as they can into storage before the rain and cover the rest up. I’ll come check on it in a moment since I have a feeling the Thorn Queen is about to depart with some haste.”
The woman gave a quick curtsey and shut the door once more. “You’re right,” I said, jerking my thong back on. “I’m leaving.”
“Yes,” he agreed, still smiling. “Because that’s your normal course of action when something happens that you don’t know how to process.”
“That’s the thing,” I growled. “Nothing happened here, okay? None of this did.”
His eyebrows rose. “Really? Because I could have sworn that something happened when my hand was between your-”
“No!” I would have approached him with clenched fists to drive home my threat but was afraid of what would happen if I was close to him again. “This didn’t happen. This was anger and confusion and me in a weak place, okay? I appreciate what you’ve done here with the copper-really. And for the advice on the girls. But that’s it.”
I turned, not wanting to look into those green eyes or see that smirk anymore. I didn’t want to admit that loving two men was just like the rest of my life, ripped into two worlds. I needed to get out of here and get back home-though I wasn’t sure which home I meant. Dorian didn’t try to stop me, but his voice rang out after me as I hurried out and rain began to fall outside.
“Don’t forget what I said, Eugenie. Crown or not, you are a queen, so don’t be afraid to do what you have to do. Love and ruthlessness. Those are the keys.”
Chapter Nineteen
I returned to my castle in shock-and in a downpour. My control of water let me shift the rain away from me, but after a while, I didn’t feel like wasting the mental effort on it. It felt kind of good after such a hot day, and besides, I had a few other things on my mind. Like if it was going to rain every time I got aroused. That was not cool. I guessed I could handle it so long as it rained other times as well. I didn’t want the connection to be so obvious. Hey, it’s raining! The queen must have gotten laid. Ooh…is that hail? Must have been into some kinky shit today….
I was also debating whether or not having a guy stick his hand up your skirt and get you off was technically cheating or not.
Okay, I supposed there wasn’t much “technically” about it. I was getting caught up in gender stereotypes. If I’d gotten him off-say, like, by going down on him-there would have been no question of infidelity. So, this was no different. Fuck. How had it happened? One minute we’d been arguing…the next? Grope central. There’d been emotion and magic, and it had all happened so fast. I shivered, thinking of all the warnings about using strong magic. Was that to blame? Or just my own weakness? And at the same time, I couldn’t also help but think that strong magic could solve a few of my problems.
Excepting, of course, the problem of whether or not I should tell Kiyo what had happened between Dorian and me…
“Your majesty!”
Nia went crazy when she saw my drenched state. She had a hundred remedies for me, but all I wanted was a simple towel and the jeans and shirt I’d arrived in earlier. Waiting for the servants to draw hot baths around here took too much time and effort; I could get back to Tucson and into my own shower or sauna much more easily. And after still being unnerved by Dorian, I was particularly anxious to return to what I saw as safety. Though lately, I was starting to think no place was safe anymore.
