fail. There has been murder in all my choices since I became this man's guide, such murder-” She choked on the bile of what she had seen, and had to swallow violently before she could continue. “Because my path took us too close to Mount Thunder. You passed around that place. You must have seen the evil working there.”
Distantly, the Giant said, “I saw.”
'We went into the knowledge of that wrong, rather than make our way across the Centre Plains. And now it is too late for anyone. He-The Grey Slayer has returned. I chose that path because I desired healing for myself. What will happen to the Lords if I ask them to help me now?'
And give up your revenge? Covenant wondered. He could not comprehend. He turned completely toward her and studied her face, trying to see her health, her spirit.
She looked as if she were in the grip of a ravaging illness. Her mien had thinned and sharpened; her spacious eyes were shadowed, veiled in darkness; her lips were drained of blood. And vertically down the centre of her forehead lay a deep line like a rift in her skull-the tool work of unblinkable despair. Etched there was the vastness of the personal hurt which she contained by sheer force of will, and the damage she did herself by containing it.
At last Covenant saw clearly the moral struggle that wasted her, the triple conflict between her abhorrence of him, her fear for the Land, and her dismay at her own weakness-a struggle whose expense exhausted her resources, reduced her to penury. The sight shamed his heart, made him drop his gaze. Without thinking, he reached toward her and said-in a voice full of self-contradicting pleas, “Don't give up.”
“Give up?” she gasped in virulence, backing away from him. “If I gave up, I would stab you where you stand!” Suddenly, she thrust a hand into her robe and snatched out a stone knife like the one Covenant had lost. Brandishing it, she spat, “Since the Celebration since you permitted Wraiths to die-this blade has cried out for your blood: Other crimes I could set aside. I speak for my own. But that-! To countenance such desecration-!”
She hurled the knife savagely to the ground, so that it stuck hilt-deep in the turf by Covenant's feet. “Behold!” she cried, and in that instant her voice became abruptly gelid, calm. 'I wound the Earth instead of you. It is fitting. I have done little else since you entered the Land.
“Now hear my last word, Unbeliever. I let you go because these decisions surpass me. Delivering children in the Stonedown does not fit me for such choices. But I will not intrude my desires on the one hope of the Land barren as that hope is. Remember that I have withheld my hand-I have kept my Oath.”
“Have you?” he asked, moved by a complex impulse of sympathy and nameless ire.
She pointed a trembling finger at her knife. “I have not harmed you. I have brought you here.”
“You've hurt yourself.”
“That is my Oath,” she breathed stiffly. “Now, farewell. When you have returned in safety to your own world, remember what evil is.”
He wanted to protest, argue, but her emotion mastered him, and he held himself silent before the force of her resolve. Under the duress of her eyes, he bent, and drew her knife out of the grass. It came up easily. He half expected to see blood ooze from the slash it had made in the turf, but the thick grass closed over the cut, hiding it as completely as an absolution. Unconsciously, he tested the blade with his thumb, felt its acuteness.
When he looked up again, he saw that Atiaran was climbing up the hill and away, moving with the unequal stride of a cripple.
This isn't right! he shouted at her back. Have mercy! — pity! But his tongue felt too thick with the pain of her renunciation; he could not speak. At least forgive yourself. The tightness of his face gave him a nasty impression that he was grinning. Atiaran! he groaned. Why are we so unable?
Into his aching, the Giant's voice came gently. “Shall we go?”
Dumbly, Covenant nodded. He tore his eyes from Atiaran's toiling back, and shoved her knife under his belt.
Saltheart Foamfollower motioned for him to climb into the boat. When Covenant had vaulted over the gunwale and taken a seat on a thwart in the prow the only seat in the thirty-foot craft small enough for him-the Giant stepped aboard, pushing off from the bank at the same time. Then he went to the broad, shallow stern. Standing there, he grasped the tiller. A surge of power flowed through the keel. He swung his craft away from the riverbank into midstream, and shortly it was moving westward among the Hills.
As soon as he had taken his seat, Covenant had turned with failure in his throat to watch Atiaran's progress up the hillside. But the surge of power which moved the boat gave it a brisk pace as fast as running, and in moments distance had reduced her to a brown mite in the lush, oblivious green of Andelain. With a harsh effort, he forced his eyes to let her go, compelled himself to look instead for the source of the boat's power.
But he could locate no power source. The boat ran smoothly up against the current as if it were being towed by fish. It had no propulsion that he could discern. Yet his nerves were sensitive to the energy flowing through the keel. Dimly, he asked, “What makes this thing move? I don't see any engine.”
Foamfollower stood in the stern, facing upstream, with the high tiller under his left arm and his right held up to the river breezes; and he was chanting something, some plainsong,in a language Covenant could not understand-a song with a wave-breaking, salty timbre like the taste of the sea. For a moment after Covenant's question, he kept up his rolling chant. But soon its language changed, and Covenant heard him sing:
Stone and Sea are deep in life,
two unalterable symbols of the world:
permanence at rest, and permanence in motion;
participants in the Power that remains.
Then Foamfollower stopped, and looked down at Covenant with humour sparkling under his unbreachable brows. “A stranger to the Land,” he said. “Did that woman teach you nothing?”
Covenant stiffened in his seat. The Giant's tone seemed to demean Atiaran, denigrate the cost she had borne; his bland, impregnable forehead and humorous glance appeared impervious to sympathy. But her pain was vivid to Covenant. She had been dispossessed of so much normal human love and warmth. In a voice rigid with anger, he retorted, “She is Atiaran Trell-mate, of Mithil Stonedown, and she did better than teach me. She brought me safely past Ravers, murdered Waynhim, a bloody moon, ur-viles, Could you have done it?”
Foamfollower did not reply, but a grin spread gaily over his face, raising the end of his beard like a mock salute.
“By hell!” Covenant flared. “Do you think I'm lying? I wouldn't condescend to lie to you.”
At that, the Giant's humour burst into high, head back, bubbling laughter.
Covenant watched, stifling with rage, while Foamfollower laughed. Briefly, he bore the affront. Then he jumped from his seat and raised his staff to strike the Giant.
Foamfollower stopped him with a placating gesture. “Softly, Unbeliever,” he said. “Will you feel taller if I sit down?”
“Hell and blood!” Covenant howled. Swinging his arms savagely, he struck the floorboards with the ur-vile blackened end of his staff.
The boat pitched as if his blow had sent the river into convulsions. Staggering, he clutched a thwart to save himself from being thrown overboard. In a moment, the spasm passed, leaving the sun-glittered stream as calm as before. But he remained gripping the thwart for several long heartbeats, while his nerves jangled and his ring throbbed heavily.
Covenant, he snarled to steady himself, you would be ridiculous if you weren't so-ridiculous. He drew himself erect, and stood with his feet braced until he had a stranglehold on his emotions. Then he bent his gaze toward Foamfollower, probed the Giant's aura. But he could perceive no ill; Foamfollower seemed as hale as native granite. Ridiculous! Covenant repeated. “She deserves respect.”
“Ah, forgive me,” said the Giant. With a twist, he lowered the tiller so that he could hold it under his arm in a sitting position. 'I meant no disrespect. Your loyalty relieves me. And I know how to value what she has achieved.” He seated himself in the stern and leaned back against the tiller so that his eyes were only a foot above Covenant's. “Yes, and how to grieve for her as well. There are none in the Land, not men or Giants or Ranyhyn, who would bear you to-to Lord's Keep faster than I will.'
Then his smile returned. “But you, Thomas Covenant, Unbeliever and stranger in the Land-you burn yourself too freely. I laughed when I saw you because you seemed like a rooster threatening one of the Ranyhyn. You waste yourself, Thomas Covenant.”
Covenant took a double grip on his anger, and said quietly, “Is that a fact? You judge too quickly, Giant.”
Another fountain of laughter bubbled out of Foamfollower's chest. “Bravely said! Here is a new thing in the
