That summer my wife was feeling poorly; she spent long hours in that river breeze, in the shifting sun and shade. To provide distraction from our insect-ridden life, I rowed her upriver one fine Sunday for some cultured conversation with Baron Msyoo de Chevelier-“Shoveleer,” as the local people knew him. Long ago, I’d shot the Frenchman’s felt hat off his head as a warning to keep out of my plume bird territory and I warned Mandy that, seeing my boat, he would rush into his cabin for his weapon. When he did just that, Mandy had to smile, but fortunately that kind smile reassured him: he set down his fowling piece and resigned himself to Watson’s imposition.
Jean Chevelier sniffed crossly as he picked his way about. Those hooded eyes of his were a raccoon’s eyes, bright black and burning. He had long since lost the last of his good manners, having shrunken in old age and solitude to a peevish little gnome who would bark their orders to a firing squad lined up to shoot him. Ignoring my courtly introduction, he neither greeted Mrs. Watson nor welcomed her to Possum Key. Instead, he thrust under her nose the ugly queer black blisters on his withered forearm, cackling in triumph when her challenged husband could not tell her what had caused them. “Man-chi-neel!” he cried. In a perverse impulse of scientific inquiry so typical of this old man, he had purposely taken shelter from the rain beneath a manchineel or poison tree, a small smooth- barked reddish tree found in the Glades country. To tease him, I claimed I’d seen manchi-neel on Gopher Key-was that where he got those blisters? Rattled, he cried
Mandy was plainly entertained by his prickly scientific stance and could scarcely wait to report back to Lucius that the big “ironhead” or wood ibis was not a true ibis, in Chevelier’s view, but a New World stork and that the “shit-quick” was the reed heron or bittern.
Deftly Mandy changed the subject to that huge greenish gator which frequented the riverbank across from Chatham Bend. Firing snippy questions to display her husband’s ignorance, the Frenchman sneered that in the unlikely event that my description could be trusted, my giant “alligator” was no alligator but a saltwater
I might have known that the first naturalist to describe this brute had been a Frenchman. But the crocko-deel, Chevelier complained, had been falsely claimed by a mere French colonial, the rascally Jean-Jacques Audubon, who had dared to belittle Chevelier’s old mentor Rafinesque-Constantine Samuel Rafinesque-Schmaltz-after robbing him of his discovery. Chevelier’s hatred of “fokink Aud-u-bone” was only exceeded by his oft-expressed disdain for God Almighty. (In the face of sacrilege, Mandy batted her eyes prettily, her smile an entreaty as well as a signal that her honor would remain unsullied if her husband did not rise up in wrath to strike this villain down.)
However, to spare Mandy, I distracted him: “Is it true there are white shell canals at Gopher Key?” The old man hitched forward, a gleam of duplicity lighting his eye. Avoiding all mention of Gopher Key, he proposed that the white shell found in such canals could only have derived from a huge clam bed somewhere along this coast-an obvious conclusion that had not occurred to me. If he were a younger man, he assured Mandy-he had yet to address me directly, far less look me in the eye-he would locate and stake out that area for a canning industry. I pictured the coast charts in my head: that clam bed’s location could only be the vast shallow bank off the empty coast north of Chatham River, easily accessible from Pavilion Key.
Seeing me distracted, cracking my knuckles, Mandy guided the conversation to the topic of French poetry, agreeing with Msyoo that Edgar Allan Poe was less esteemed in his own country than in France, where he’d been discovered and translated by the poet Beau Delair,
Msyoo presently declared that France had conquered Florida back in the 1590s, as proven by such local names as Cape Sable and Cape Romaine: had it not been for the Louisiana Purchase, France’s rightful territories would include most if not all of North America. He scurried inside to dig out mildewed books by a pair of clever Frenchies who knew a great deal more about America than we Americans could ever hope to learn.
De Tocqueville, who had visited this country in the 1830s, had been appalled on the one hand by the callous indifference with which most Americans regarded slavery and astonished on the other by the slaves’ strange apathy and acceptance of their lot, which not only inured them to wretched servitude but caused them to imitate their oppressors rather than hate them. In my own experience, this was also true of chain gangs, cane crews, and other hard-used men, not merely blacks, but Chevelier dismissed my idiotic quibble by flicking his fingers toward my face in the way he might brush cake crumbs off his lap. “Compared to
Here Mandy neatly intervened, observing that most European writers-the French writer Chateaubriand, for one-seemed to cherish a romantic view of
“As was recognized by the U.S. Army and most historians,” I chimed in, quoting a general who had told the Congress that the First Seminole War was essentially a “Negro war.” Even De Tocqueville had remarked, said Mandy-I was so proud of her!-that escaped slaves who in the early days had turned up among Indian tribes throughout the South had to be men of exceptional courage and fortitude to survive a hostile wilderness and its wild peoples. Therefore they were much admired by the Indians and often married into the head families, producing a mixed-blood progeny of fine physical specimens of high intelligence-
To gall him, I added what Napoleon Broward had remarked, that it was the destiny of E. J. Watson to develop this southwest coast. The old man scoffed rudely,
Chevelier was wildly emboldened by her smile. When Mandy suggested that the Ten Thousand Islands, with their myriad channels, evoked the Labyrinth in Greek mythology, he speedily retorted that if the Islands were the Labyrinth, Madame’s own
Msyoo le Baron Jean de Chevelier had the gall to be galled by Mandy’s fondness for her husband and did not trouble to hide it: he stared at us half-mad, mouth twisting cruelly. (Elderly indigestion, she suggested later.) Plainly this bachelor gentleman had been smitten by an educated lady and was trying to court her with his hard-earned rare knowledge, and when my wife hinted at his real emotion, overtaking him too late in life in this painful way, it seemed absurd to be angered by his insults. Standing up, I reminded him that his bullet-punctured hat still hung on a kitchen peg, to be returned on his first visit to the Bend. Which would be most welcome, Mandy added.
Leaving Mrs. Watson to accept his fond adoos, I bid him good-bye-we did not care to shake hands-and went back to the boat. Mandy thanked him for his kind hospitality, though this old misery hadn’t offered us so much as a cup of rainwater.