Beautiful Disaster

America chatted about her day and plans with Shepley for the weekend. We scoured the internet for funny videos, laughing so hard we were wiping away tears. Kara huffed a few times at our disruption, but we ignored her.

I was grateful for America’s visit. The hours passed so quickly that I didn’t spend a moment wondering if Travis had called until she decided to call it a night.

America yawned and looked at her watch. “I’m going to bed, Ab…aw, shit!” she said, snapping her fingers. “I left my make-up bag at Shep’s.”

“That’s not a tragedy, Mare,” I said, still giggling from the latest video we’d watched.

“It wouldn’t be if I didn’t have my birth control in there. C’mon. I have to go get it.”

“Can’t you just get Shepley to bring them?”

“Travis has his car. He’s at the Red with Trent.”

I felt sick. “Again? Why is he hanging out with Trent so much, anyway?”

America shrugged. “Does it matter? C’mon!”

“I don’t want to run into Travis. It’ll be weird.”

“Do you ever listen to me? He’s not there, he’s at the Red. Come on!” she whined, tugging on my arm.

I stood up with mild resistance as she pulled me from the room.

“Finally,” Kara said.

We pulled up to Travis’ apartment, and I noted that the Harley was parked under the stairs, and that Shepley’s Charger was missing. I breathed a sigh of relief, and followed America up the icy steps.

“Careful,” she warned.

If I’d known how unsettling it would be to step foot in the apartment again, I wouldn’t have let America talk me into going there. Toto scampered around the corner at full speed, crashing into my legs when his tiny paws failed to get traction on the entryway tile. I picked him up, letting him greet me with his baby kisses. At least he hadn’t forgotten me.

I carried him around the apartment, waiting while America searched for her bag.

“I know I left it here!” she said from the bathroom, stomping down the hall to Shepley’s room.

“Did you look in the cabinet under the sink?” Shepley asked.

I looked at my watch. “Hurry, Mare. We need to get going.”

America sighed in frustration from the bedroom.

I looked down at my watch again, and then jumped when the front door burst open behind me. Travis stumbled in, his arms wrapped around Megan, who was giggling against his mouth. A box in her hand caught my eye, and I felt sick when I realized what it was: condoms. Her other hand was on the back of his neck, and I couldn’t tell whose arms were tangled around who.

Travis did a double take when he saw me standing alone in the middle of the living room, and when he froze, Megan looked up with a residual smile still on her face.

“Pigeon,” Travis said, stunned.

“Found it!” America said, jogging out of Shepley’s room.

“What are you doing here?” he asked. The stench of whiskey blew in with the flurry of snowflakes, and my uncontrollable anger overcame any need to feign indifference.

“It’s good to see you’re feeling like your old self, Trav,” I said. The heat that radiated from my face burned my eyes and blurred my vision.

“We were just leaving,” America snarled, grabbing my hand as we slid passed Travis.

We flew down the steps toward her car, and I was thankful that it was just a few steps further, feeling the tears well up in my eyes. I almost fell backward when my coat snagged on something mid-step. America’s hand slipped from mine and she flipped around the same time I did.

Travis’ fist gripping my coat, and my ears caught fire, stinging in the cold night air. His lips and collar were a ridiculous shade of deep red.

“Where are you going?” he said, a half-drunk, half-confused look in his eyes.

“Home,” I snapped, straightening my coat when he released me.

“What are you doing here?”

I could hear the packed snow crunch under America’s feet as she walked up behind me, and Shepley flew down the stairs to stand behind Travis, his wary eyes fixed on his girlfriend.

“I’m sorry. If I’d know you were going to be here, I wouldn’t have come.”

He shoved his hands in his coat pockets. “You can come here anytime you want, Pidge. I never wanted you to stay away.”

I couldn’t manage the acidity in my voice. “I don’t want to interrupt.” I looked to the top of the stairs where Megan stood with a smug expression. “Enjoy your evening,” I said, turning away.

He grabbed my arm. “Wait. You’re mad?”

I yanked my coat from his grip. “You know…I don’t even know why I’m surprised.”

His eyebrows pulled in. “I can’t win with you. I can’t win with you! You say you’re done…I’m fucking miserable over here! I had to break my phone into a million pieces to keep from calling you every minute of the damn day — I’ve had to play it off like everything is just fine at school so you can be happy…and you’re fucking mad at me? You broke my fuckin’ heart!” His last words echoed into the night.

“Travis, you’re drunk. Let Abby go home,” Shepley said.

Travis grabbed my shoulders and pulled me to him. “Do you want me, or not? You can’t keep doing this to me, Pidge!”

“I didn’t come here to see you.” I said, glaring up at him.

“I don’t want her,” he said, staring at my lips. “I’m just so fucking unhappy, Pigeon.” His eyes glossed over and he leaned in, tilting his head to kiss me.

I grabbed him by the chin, holding him back. “You’ve got her lipstick on your mouth, Travis,” I said, disgusted.

He took a step back and lifted his shirt, wiping his mouth. He stared at the red streaks on the white fabric and shook his head. “I just wanted to forget. Just for one fuckin’ night.”

I wiped an escaped tear. “Then don’t let me stop you.”

I tried to retreat to the Honda, but Travis grabbed my arm again. In the next moment, America was wildly hitting his arm with her fists. He looked at her, blinking for a moment in stunned disbelief. She balled up her fists and pounded them against his chest until he released me.

“Leave her alone, you bastard!”

Shepley grabbed her and she pushed him away, turning to slap Travis’ face. The sound of her hand against his cheek was quick and loud, and I flinched with the noise. Everyone froze for a moment, shocked at America’s sudden rage.

Travis frowned, but he didn’t defend himself. Shepley grabbed her again, holding her wrists and pulled her to her car while she thrashed about.

She fought him, her blonde hair whipping around with her attempts to get away. I was amazed at her determination to get at Travis. Pure hate glowed in her usually sweet, carefree eyes.

“How could you? She deserved better from you, Travis!”

“America, STOP!” Shepley yelled, louder than I’d ever heard him.

Her arms fell to her side as she glared at Shepley with incredulity. “You’re defending him?”

Although he seemed nervous, he stood his ground. “Abby broke up with him. He’s just trying to move on.”

Her eyes narrowed and she pulled her arm from his grip. “Well then why don’t you go find a random WHORE—,” she looked at Megan, “—from the Red and bring her home to fuck, and then let me know if it helps you get over me.”

“Mare,” Shepley grabbed for her but she evaded him, slamming the door as she sat behind the wheel. I sat beside her, trying not to look at Travis.

“Baby, don’t leave,” Shepley begged, leaning down into the window.