I controlled my eyes from bulging from their sockets, but I couldn’t stop my mouth from turning up into a half surprised, half appreciative grin. My eyes focused on his lips again.
“So…why did you bring me here?”
He shrugged. “You said all I had to do was tell you the truth. That was all I needed to hear.”
“When did I say that?” I felt my eyebrows pull in as my mind rewound the night’s conversation.
He hesitated. “To Beth…last night.”
“In my room? How did you hear that?”
Jared sighed and sat taller in his seat, bracing for round two. “Just hear me out before you leave,” he said in a low tone. “It’s my duty to protect you. I can’t do that without knowing where you are at all times. I couldn’t walk around freely in your dorm, so we had to have eyes and ears in place.”
“What do you mean eyes and ears?”
“Your father was meticulous.” He was stalling.
“Spit it out, Jared.”
“When you were accepted into Brown, Jack had cameras installed in Andrews and different places on campus. We tracked the GPS in your car of course, but that had been in place the day Jack bought it. We tracked the GPS in your cell phone as well, and your parents’ house has always been wired.” Jared spoke casually, but he was braced for another outburst.
“There’s a camera… in my room?” I spoke slowly, the anger and shock nearly choking my words.
“No! No, no, no…,” Jared chuckled nervously. “There’s a camera in the hall. We only placed a mic in your room.”
I considered that for a moment, trying to recall if I’d ever done anything embarrassing. Nothing came to mind — I hoped that nothing would.
Jared squirmed. “Just to be clear, I don’t enjoy invading your privacy in that way, but it is necessary.” I pouted as a smile spread across his face. “Well, that’s not true. I enjoyed it last night.”
I tensed, closing my eyes. “What did you hear?”
Jared’s warm hand touched mine. “I heard Beth say that you loved me. And I didn’t hear you deny it.”
My eyes popped open. “You heard wrong, then. I did deny it.”
“I heard you try to convince her otherwise. Are you telling me that I’m mistaken?”
I pulled my hand from his in defiance. I didn’t like being ambushed.
He smiled at my stubbornness. “The second you walked away from me, my choice was clear.” His expression didn’t last long when I didn’t return his smile. “You’re angry.”
“I have no secrets,” I sulked. “Does my mother know about this?”
Jared nodded. I threw up my hands in frustration, letting them smack loudly into my lap. He kneeled in front of me on the floor, forcing me to look at him.
“It was necessary, Nina,” he said, lightly touching my bare knees.
“So that’s how you always miraculously appear?” I was aware that he knew my whereabouts, but I had no idea I was being spied on twenty-four-seven.
“That’s part of it,” he said with the evasive tone I was bitterly becoming accustomed to.
“And the other part is?”
“I’m getting to that.”
“There’s more?” I howled.
“First, since you now know the worst part of it—,' I rolled my eyes, “—I owe you an apology,” Jared said.
“I’d say so!”
“I’m sorry about Mr. Dawson. Claire was on watch both of those nights, and she made the decision to let it get farther than I would have for intel purposes. She wanted to know what Mr. Dawson knew.”
“Claire watches me, too?” I shrieked.
“Yes. I’m sorry you were scared. I relieved Claire the second I heard the news, which is when I came to take you home.”
Initially I was furious, but the anger disappeared when I remembered feeling desperate for Jared to intervene. How could I be angry with him for wanting the same thing that I did?
“I thought you would come,” I whispered.
“You what?” he said, surprised.
“When Mr. Dawson threatened me, I expected you to show up at any moment. It made the whole thing… tolerable.”
“Tolerable?”
And then he was angry. He didn’t speak for several minutes. His jaw flitted under his skin, and he occasionally shook his head. I waited for as long as I could, but I finally prompted him.
“What’s wrong?” I asked, searching his stormy eyes.
“The first time that you expected me to protect you…I wasn’t there.” He spoke the last three words as if they were poison in his mouth.
“You can’t be there every second, Jared. You’re only human.” I returned my hands to his. He brought my hand to his lips.
“I’m sorry,” he whispered, his face twisting in torment.
“It’s okay,” I said, surprised. I didn’t expect his reaction.
His earlier description of the suffering he had experienced while witnessing my pain materialized. His time with me must have seemed like purgatory. I felt an overpowering urge to comfort him, and I was just inches away.
“It won’t happen again,” he promised. His eyes were fixed on mine.
“I’m holding you to that.” A match had been lit inside me; I was burning from the sudden need to touch him, to alleviate the self-loathing in his eyes.
I leaned forward and rested my fingers against each side of his neck. My thumbs grazed his jaw line, the fear of rejection a faint memory. Pulling him closer, I pressed my lips against his. He cautiously returned my kiss, but when he began to pull away I refused to let go.
After a brief, surprised pause, Jared gave into my insistence, wrapping his arms around me and pressing me against him. A quiet hum of satisfaction escaped my lips, and his mouth grew more urgent against mine. He sat up on his knees to tighten his grip, and his hand clutched the back of my neck. My breath became ragged as his lips parted and his outstandingly warm tongue found its way to mine. My knees parted and I pulled him against me, eliminating the tiny space between us.
He groaned in frustration and then his grip tightened, holding me a few inches away by my shoulders.
“What?” I puffed.
He took a few deep breaths before answering, staring at my lips. “We still have a lot to discuss,” he breathed, letting go of my shoulders to press my knees together.
“I’m done talking,” I whispered, leaning in again.
Jared gently restrained me, amused at my fortitude. “I can’t,” he said, taking a deep breath. “I brought you here to tell you the whole truth, not just half of it.”
I sighed in resignation, sinking back into the couch cushion.
He smiled at my pouting. “Not that I’m not incredibly tempted.” He sat up on his knees again, and brushed his lips against mine, pulling away as quickly as he began.
“Okay. Let’s talk,” I said, more eager than ever to have everything out in the open. “You haven’t been honest with me.”
He raised an eyebrow. “Excuse me?”
“You can’t tell me that you haven’t had time for girls, now. Not when you kiss like that.”
Jared’s expression was ecstatic, and then he made a poor attempt to disguise it. “I beg to differ. I’m not an idiot…it’s not a difficult concept.”
“I have kissed boys, some of those boys more than once, that never kissed like that.”
Jared closed in and kissed my neck — from collar bone to the line of my jaw — stopping to whisper in my ear. “That’s because you kissed boys, sweetheart.”
My heart pounded so loudly that I was sure he could hear it. I let out a long sigh. “Okay, you’ve got to tell me
