“They went underground as I did myself.”
“Under whose control?”
“Initially the White Guards but later we became the servants of…an unholy alliance of snakes and running dogs.” At this, Sagan again smirked, and Sashenka sensed within him a mixture of shame and mockery. Behind his shifting, restless blue irises he seemed to be weeping, begging her to forgive him. Had they drugged him?
“Under whose command, Sagan?”
“Ultimately under the command of Japanese and British intelligence but taking orders from the United Opposition of Trotsky and Bukharin.”
“So all these years you were still in contact with the accused?”
“I was the contact between her and the enemies of the Soviet working people.”
“You met regularly?”
“Yes, we did.”
“This is laughable,” Sashenka shouted. “I’ve never heard of this man. The policeman Sagan was killed on Nevsky Prospect in 1917. This man is an actor!”
“What other agents did she recruit?”
“Her husband, Vanya Palitsyn. And more recently the writer Benya Golden—using the same degenerate sexual techniques I taught her as a girl.”
“So Japanese and British intelligence, along with Trotsky and Bukharin, were running traitor Mendel in the Central Committee, traitor Palitsyn in the NKVD, and traitor Golden the writer for years on end?”
“Yes!”
“You bastard!” Sashenka threw herself across the table but when her fingers came into contact with her accuser, it was like grabbing handfuls of sand. There was nothing to hold. The old man was so weak that he fell off his chair, grazing his head on the side of the table and lying on the floor in a heap.
Kobylov lifted her up from behind like a rag doll and dropped her hard onto her chair.
“Careful, girl, we’ve got to look after him, haven’t we, boys?” said Mogilchuk as he helped Sagan off the floor. He was still floppy and could barely sit up, legs and hands a blur of spasms.
Sashenka experienced the despair of the damned. This scarecrow was tolling the bells on her entire life. She thought of her children. The unthinkable had happened. Nothing was as she had imagined.
She was not irrelevant to this case, she realized. She was its pivot—the center of the spider’s web—and she would never get out, never see Snowy and Carlo again. “Give me time to settle the children,” Satinov had demanded. She prayed he had succeeded.
Was it now time to put Vanya’s plan into action? “Only confess when you realize you have no choice,” he’d instructed. Had he held out this long?
“Good work, boys!” Kobylov clapped his hands together and left, kicking the door shut behind him with a gleaming boot.
Mogilchuk held up a file entitled
“Here’s your confession. You’ve signed every page and at the end, have you not?”
Sagan nodded, jiggling his knees and scratching.
The Chekist tossed it over to Sashenka. “There, Accused Zeitlin-Palitsyn! Read it! You couldn’t remember all this? How could you have forgotten?”
44
“Comrade Stepanian, any sign of a telegram?”
Carolina staggered into the stationmaster’s office. It was the next morning, a fan whirred overhead, and the hot office was crowded that day. An old peasant in blouse and clogs, two little eyes peering over a long white beard, sat in front of the desk; a young man in a Party tunic with a Kalinin beard waited with passport and tickets; an NKVD officer read a sports magazine with his feet up on the radiator.
Comrade Stepanian put his hand on the pile of telegrams and patted it.
“No, no, there’s no telegram…”
Carolina was overcome with despair. Satinov had failed them; it had all been for nothing. “I’m leaving today,” she said, on the edge of tears. “I can’t wait any longer.”
She dragged herself and the children to the door and was struggling to open it when suddenly Stepanian shook himself and clicked his tongue like a woodpecker.
“Wait! There’s no telegram—but there’s someone waiting for you by the samovar in the canteen. A woman. She’s been here for some time.”
“Thank you, Comrade Stepanian. Thank you! I could embrace you…” and she rushed out.
“Is it Mama?” asked Carlo as they hurried to the cafe.
“Mama’s gone away,” said Snowy seriously. “Carolina’s told you already. We’re on an adventure.”
“Come on,” said Carolina. “Run quickly. Oh, please God she hasn’t left already.”
Inside the canteen, a little apart from the line for tea and hot water beside the steaming samovar and farther from the trays of greasy dumplings, pirozhki and
“Hello, I’ve come to meet you.” She smiled at them all and offered a hand to Carolina, who seemed beyond such courtesies. The two women eyed each other for a moment, then hugged like old friends.
“I’m sorry it’s taken so long. The train was delayed and I’m not practiced at all this. Come, let’s sit down at this table,” she said, speaking slowly, looking hard at the children, her darling Sashenka’s children. “I have a room in the Revolution Hotel in Rostov where we can go and wash and get some sleep. We can eat there too. I have papers stamped for the children and I was given some money.”
Carolina tottered and then sat and buried her face in her hands—and Lala knew what this moment must be costing the nanny. Carlo ran to Carolina and kissed her hair. “You’re my best friend in the whole wide world!” he said, stroking her cheek.
Lala placed her hand on Carolina’s shoulder. “We’re living in bad times and you’ve done so well to get here. Please, Carolina, stop crying! I never asked for this job. Like you, I’m risking a lot to do it. I too am out of my depth.”
“But you have a plan? You know what to do?”
“Yes, I have instructions. Carolina, I’ll do anything to carry them through.” She looked once more at the children and they stared at her.
“Who is she?” asked Snowy.
“Be polite, Snowy!” Lala saw Carolina return to her brisk self. “This lady is going to help you.”
“Where’s Mama?” asked Carlo, his face collapsing again.
“You must be Carlo,” said Lala. “I have something for you.” She reached into a canvas bag and pulled out a cookie tin illustrated with a picture of the Kremlin.
Carlo could not take his eyes off the tin. Lala opened it and Carlo gasped at the yellow magic of the cookies with their delicious cream and jam fillings but did not move.
“I heard you liked these,” she said, feeling Carolina smile at her.
“Look, Carlo,” said Snowy, “she knows they’re your favorite.” Snowy took one and gave it to Carlo, who ate it. He took hold of his sister’s hand.
“Hello, Snowy. Is that your friend Cushion?” asked Lala.
“You’ve heard of Cushion?”
“Of course, Cushion is famous. Hello, Miss Cushion! You’re much blonder than your mummy, Snowy, and your eyes are blue but you have her mouth—and you, Carlo, look just like your father.”
“You know Mama?” asked Snowy.
“You know Papa?” said Carlo.
“Oh yes,” said Lala, remembering the day she’d first met Sashenka and had loved her instantly like her own.
