Blossomfest, all with full pockets and empty hearts.
He allowed his summoned tears to dry.
'As I see it,' Chester said, wiping a dribble of moonshine and tobacco juice off his chin as he leaned against the porch rail, 'we got some kind of freak-o’-nature thing going on. Like those two-headed calves a body hears about, or when you cut open a tomato and the seeds inside are already sprouting. Carnival sideshow stuff.'
DeWalt’s head had stopped bleeding but it throbbed dully with pain. He almost asked Chester for a swig of corn liquor, but then Chester's brown-stained backwash slogged into the jar as the old mountaineer pulled it from his lips again. DeWalt drew his pipe from his pocket and inhaled its gummy comfort instead.
“But why?” DeWalt said around the stem.
' Why is a fuck-all, pardner,' Chester said. 'Why Windshake? Why the hell not? What is a more likely question. And how? The facts is that my longtime pal and the best damned shine cook to ever set foot in the Blue Ridge Mountains turned into a rotted stack of mush. And my good coon hound ended up more dandelion weed than dog. My hog was pretty much a hunk of soybean squeezings by the time I got to it. Now, I got my eye on those pea-brained chickens.'
'Shouldn't we notify the authorities, Chester? I mean, this might be widespread by now. There might be others. If this is some kind of infectious disease-”
'Now, what kind of a disease turns a man into a mushbrained mess like that? Ain't heard no old mountain tales such as that. And I'll bet bear for cornmeal that it ain't wrote down in none of your books, neither.'
DeWalt gripped the arms of the rocker. Chester had teased him about his folklore studies for the entire three years they'd known each other. Chester was the voice of experience, the man who had hunted in the Appalachian snow and foraged under the silent trees. Chester carried the mountains in the cracks of his boots and skin, in the linings of his lungs, in his sluggish blue blood. But now the rules of the Living Game had abruptly changed and the rug of natural law had been pulled from underfoot.
And DeWalt was fed up with Chester's digs.
'Look here, you hairy-eared bastard. Just because you're full up to your bloodshot eyeballs with mountain wisdom doesn't make you an expert on whatever's happening now, in a world where trees fall for no reason and animals get turned inside out. So let's just admit we don't know a goddamned thing, and maybe work together to get to the-uh, well, to the goddamned root of the problem.'
Chester drew back as if he had been slapped. His eyes narrowed and he looked at DeWalt as if seeing him for the first time. Then he nodded in admiration and broke into a hacking spasm of laughter.
'I was wondering if you had any sand in your gizzard, DeWalt. I guess maybe you're real settler stock after all. Wouldn't have sold you that land if I thought you was a hopeless Yankee sonuvabitch.'
DeWalt looked across the farm at the surrounding woods. 'Well, you can ridicule me later. Right now, I think it's best we contact the authorities. We don't know what we're up against.'
DeWalt's instinct was to turn to the comfort of civilized thought, research, and investigation. To let others worry about the problem. To sit and scratch his balls while the cavalry rode over the hill.
'You expect anybody else will know what the fuck’s going on?' Chester said. 'Like you said, things have changed. Something ain't right in these woods. Ever since them damned green lights-”
' Hey.” DeWalt punctuated his shout by slapping his palms on the worn rocker. “I'll bet all this has something to do with that green radiance that permeated the water.'
'Oh, that glowing shit, like?' Chester rubbed his rough chin. 'Come to recollect, the trees got funny right after the lights started up. Thought I was having one of those heebie-jeebie fits, the kind you get when they run you through detox and you start seeing things. So I sort of paid it no never-mind, the way a body does when they see something that don't fit the big picture.'
'Except nothing fits the picture anymore. Where did you see it, exactly?' DeWalt stood with bone-bruised effort and walked to the edge of the porch. His eyes followed Chester's quivering index finger.
'Over that rise. Right at the ass end of my lot and right above-Sweet Mary, Jesus, and Joseph the goddamned Carpenter. Right above Don Oscar's acreage. Probably not far from his cookhouse, come to think of it.'
'It might be some kind of chemical spill, or, who knows, maybe a secret nuclear waste dump. It wouldn't be the first time the government's put its citizens in danger without their knowledge.'
'Now you just hold it right there with that Commie- liberal talk. The good old U.S. of A. wouldn't ever do such as that. Not unless they were exterminating suicide-bombing trash. Or them that don't pay their taxes.'
'I'm just trying to consider all the alternatives.'
'Well, I would have heard trucks and such. Old logging roads run all back through there, but the way sound carries before the trees flesh out, you can about hear a squirrel fart. So I ain't buying that idea. Think it’s about time to go have myself a look-see.”
'You saw that deer or whatever it was that I hit. No telling what might be out there. You can't just go off half-cocked.'
Chester's shotgun had been leaning against the rail beside him, but now he picked it up and nestled the butt against his hip, the barrel pointed to the sky. He thumbed back both triggers.
'Ain't no half about it. And there's another thing. Cops messing around out there might come across Don Oscar's still. And I think it would be disrespecting the man’s memory to have him go down on the books as a lawbreaker.'
Chester worked the jar again, his knobby throat pumping the corn liquor to his stomach. He wiped his mouth on his gray long john sleeve and added, 'We got a mountain tradition. Called ‘taking care of our own.’”
Then he swung his bones off the porch. He walked twenty feet before turning. 'You comin'? Or are you a yellow-bellied, chicken-livered California Yankee?'
DeWalt debated action.
Permission to risk life and limb, Mr. Chairman?
Oh Brother, you have nothing to lose but your pathetic, directionless life.
And yours as well, Mr. Chairman.
Remember what I was saying about the unknown? Better to curse a thousand candles than to light the darkness.
Better to sit here and scratch my nuts and call it somebody else's problem, right?
That's the spirit of the Lodge, Oh Brother. The Royal Order of the Bleeding Hearts doesn't want solutions. We want sympathy, compassion, useless lip service. Passive resistance. Working to promote change within the system. A kinder, gentler self-destruction.
Well, with all due respect, I'd like to resign my membership.
Sorry. It's a lifetime commitment.
Go to hell, Mr. Chairman.
I’m already there, Brother. And so are you.
DeWalt braced himself for the agony of rising, stiffening from the car crash. 'Hold on, Chester. I'm coming, if I can get my legs to work.'
He rattled down the stairs, feeling as old as Methuselah. He was huffing by the time he caught up. 'What do we do when we get there?'
Chester smiled, the late afternoon light making shadows in the valleys of his face. 'Daddy always told me to make hay while the sun shines, pardner,' he said, leading the way across the fields. 'Didn't say nothing about what to do in the dark.'
'Look at this fucking rot, man.” Junior stomped the planks of Don Oscar's porch and moldy dust rose in the air around them. The porch was covered with a blue powdery fungus that was about an inch deep. The mold reminded Junior of the blue mold that tainted the tobacco that his grandfather used to grow, back before the old coot had gotten so lazy.
'Where's Don Oscar?' Wade asked, a little uneasy at messing around a bootlegger's house with no one home.
'Probably up the trail doing business. See those cars in the driveway? That Mazda ain't Don Oscar's, it must be some customer.'