The Extremes

'Can you at least sign this ones?' Patricia turned over the first three pages to expose the last one. 'You know what it is. lt confirms 1 resuscitated you promptly and correctly.'

'I don't want to commit myself. I'm really pissed off with what happened.'

She continued to hold the page towards him, and after a moment he took it from her. He read it through, and of course it was exactly what she had said it was.

When he had signed it, she said, 'Thanks. If you've got a complaint, you should see Mr Lacey.

He's the administrator in charge of software policy here.'

' It's a pile of crap, Pat.'

'Which one was it?'

'The Gerry Grove one.'

'I was beginning to wonder if it might be. Quite a few people have complained about that.'

'I've been on the waiting list for more than three months. All the hype there was about it. Of all the scenarios I've tried, it's by far the most expensive

'Please ... it's nothing to do with me. 1 know why you're unhappy, but 1 only make sure the equipment works properly.'

'All right, I'm sorry.'

She left the cubicle briefly, and went to her own desk. She returned with another sheet of paper.

'Look, fill out this form, and you can either leave it in reception, or if Mr Lacey's available you can possibly see him straight away.'

'What 1 want is a refund. I'm not going to pay all that money for'

'You can probably get a refund, but it has to be authorized by Mr Lacey. I've put on the reference number of the scenario. AR you have to do is explain why you weren't satisfied.'

He stared at the sheet of paper, which was headed GunHo Corporation Customer Services: Our contract of your guaranteed satisfaction.

'All right. Thanks, Pat. I'm sorry to have a go at you.'

'I don't mind. But if you want your money back I'm the wrong person.

'OK. Sorry.'

'How are you feeling? Ready to return to the real world?'

'I think so.'

Mr Lacey was not in the building that afternoon, so at the invitation of the young woman on the front desk Dave Hartland sat down in the reception area and filled out the complaint form. He crossed out the first few preprinted responses: equipment failure, staff error or neglect, impolite staff, incorrect selection of scenario software, interruption by power failure, and so on, and concentrated on the part of the form headed OTHER?. This had a large space where the customer could describe the complaint in his/her own words. Dave wanted to do this. After some thought he wrote the following:

1.

This scenario was not set in Bulverton, because there are no mountains anywhere near Bulverton, there are no tall office buildings in Bulverton, traffic does not drive on the right, there is no suspension bridge, and no river either. The only reference to Gerry Grove is that his name is used.

2.

This was an Americanstyle police siege, not a gunman prowling the streets in search of his victims, whom my brother was one of, and 1 wanted to know how he might have died.

This did not tell me.

3.

1 have been waiting several weeks to try the scenario, as advertised in the paper, and it costs a lot of money. 1 want a refund.

He handed the form to the receptionist, who read it quickly.

' 'I'll see Mr Lacey receives this tomorrow morning,' she said. 'They get many complaints about this one, and they've been talking about using a replacement. But there's still demand for it.'

'It's no bloody good. It's just a stupid game. My kids have that sort of thing on their console.'

'That's what people seem to want.'

'It could be anywhere! It's nothing to do with what happened here. Have you tried it?'

'No, 1 haven't.' She slipped the paper into a drawer. 'I don't think there's going to be a problem with a refund. Could you come back tomorrow afternoon, or call us?'

'Yeah. OK.'

He left, feeling disgruntled. Outside, in the cold evening, the wind was blowing sharply up from the sea. Dave Hartland turned up the collar on his coat and began the long walk down the hill towards his house on London Road.

CHAPTER 6