The Rarest Sport that hath been try'd, between a lusty bridegroom and his bride.
Come from the Temple, away to the Bed,
As the Merchant transports home his Treasure;
Be not so coy Lady, since we are wed, 'Tis no Sin to taste of the Pleasure:
Then come let us be blithe, merry and free,
Upon my life all the waiters are gone;
And 'tis so, that they know where you go say not so, For I mean to make bold with my own.
What is it to me, though our Hands joyned be, If our Bodies are still kept asunder:
It shall not be said, there goes a marry'd Maid, Indeed we will have no such wonder:
Therefore let's imbrace, there's none sees thy Face, The Bride-Maids that waited are gone;
None can spy how you lye, ne'er deny but say I, For I mean to make bold with my own.
Then come let us Kiss, and taste of that bliss, Which brave Lords and Ladies injoy'd;
If Maidens should be of the humour of thee, Generations would soon be destroy'd:
Then where were those Joys, the Girls and the Boys, Would'st live in the World all alone;
Don't destroy, but injoy, seem not Coy for a Toy, For indeed I'll make bold with my own.
Sweet Love do not frown, but put off thy gown, 'Tis a Garment unfit for the Night;
Some say that Black hath a relishing smack,
I had rather be dealing in White:
Then be not afraid, for you are not betray'd, Since we two are together alone;
I invite you this Night, to do right, my delight Is forthwith to make use of my own.
Prithee begin, don't delay but unpin,
For my Humour I cannot prevent it;
You are strait lac'd, and your Gorget's so fast, Undo it, or I straight will rend it:
Or to end all the strife,
I'll cut it a Knife, 'Tis too long to stay 'till it's undone;
Let thy Waste be unlac'd, and in hast be imbrac'd, For I do long to make bold with my own.
Feel with your hand how you make me to stand, Even ready to starve in the cold, Oh, why shouldst thou be, so hard-hearted to me, That loves thee more dear than gold;
And as thou hast been, like fair Venus the Queen, Most pleasant in thy parts every one, let me find, that their mind is inclin'd, to be kind, So that I may make bold with my own.
As thou art fair, and more sweet than the air, That dallies on July's brave Roses;
Now let me be
to that Garden a Key,
That the Flowers of Virgins incloses:
And I will not be too rough unto thee,
For my Nature unto boldness is prone;
Do no less than undress, and unlace all apace, For this Night I'll make use with my own.
When I have found thee temperate and sound, Thy sweet breast I will make for my pillow; 'Tis pity that we which newly married be, Should be forced to wear the green willow;
We shall be blest and live sweetly at rest.
Now we are united in one:
With content and consent
I am bent, my intent
Is this Night to make use of my own.
The Lady's Loving Reply Welcome dear love, all the powers above, Are well pleased of our happy meeting;
The Heavens have decreed, and the Earth is agreed That I should imbrace my own sweeting, At bed and at board both in deed and in word My affection to thee shall be shown;
Thou art mine,
I am thine,
Let us joyn, and combine,
I'll not bar thee from what is thy own.
Our Bride-bed's made, thou shalt be my comrade For to lodge in my arms all the night, Where thou shalt enjoy, being free from annoy All the sports wherein love takes delight.
Our mirth shall be crown'd, and our triumph renow'd, Then sweetheart let thy valour be shown, Take thy fill, do thy will, use thy skill, Welcome still, Why should'st thou not make bold with thy own.
The Bridegroom and Bride, with much joy on each side, Then together to bed they did go, But what they did there, I did neither see not hear, Nor do I desire not to know, But by Cupids aid, they being well laid, They made sport by themselves all alone, being plac'd, and unlac'd, He uncas'd, she imbrac'd, Then he stoutly made use of his own.
At the conclusion of the concert, after declining in her hearing several pressing invitations to supper from parties of the first respectability, and giving her a look which I intended to be understood: 'I leave them all for you!' I had the pleasure of placing her arm within my own, and together with her husband accompanied her home, where on arriving he insisted on my partaking of some refreshment previous to my retiring to rest.
I soon perceived that to the list of Mr. E.'s amiable accomplishments, that of jealousy to an extravagant degree might be added-a passion which I secretly determined he should not long indulge in without ample cause, and I breathed a silent vow to exert my faculties to accomplish this project as speedily as possible. How did I burn with indignation as I observed him in the most cowardly manner, and at a moment when he believed my attention to be occupied by some paintings in another part of the room, thrust his elbows into her side with a degree of violence equal to a blow from the fist; and this only in consequence of her having a few moments before spoken in terms of admiration of my performance on that evening.
I soon took my leave for the night with tenfold hatred towards the brutal husband and a proportionate increase of love for the wife, whom I speedily hoped to convince of the wrongs she endured and to assist in a sweet revenge.
Shortly after this an occurrence took place than which nothing could have been more congenial to my feelings, as it bid fair to hasten the consummation of my designs.
I was sitting at my studies one afternoon when to my great surprise Mr.
E. entered my apartment, and after apologizing for his intrusion, begged the favour of my company to tea, adding that he had another favour to ask, which he hoped I would not refuse to hear.
I accepted his offer with some affected reluctance and followed him to his room, where I met with a most cordial reception from his wife, who blushed slightly as I gently pressed her proffered hand. In the course of the evening he again recurred to the favour he had previously alluded to, and at length asked me if I had any particular motive for continuing my present residence. I looked at him with surprise, and for a moment imagined that he suspected my intentions, but quickly recovering myself, I answered in the negative. He then proceeded to inform me that, being tired of lodgings, he had taken a house, but not having occasion for the whole of it had determined, in order to lighten his expenses, to let off a portion; that if I would take a couple of apartments, he being but a young beginner in housekeeping, it would be rendering him a most important service.
Although nothing could have happened more opportune for my design, yet thinking that should I seize his offer too readily he might suspect my real motive, I at first urged several objections, such as the distance from my connexions, etc.; but at length, rather than be deprived of the company of a friend, and having no particular acquaintance in my present neighbourhood, I suffered myself to be persuaded. We spent a pleasant evening together, and in less than a month took possession of our new residence.
It was very pleasantly situated about two miles from town, and the house, although not large, was extremely commodious; and all things were entirely in my favour, the distance precluding the possibility of his returning to his meals, in consequence of which he had to leave home every morning at six, taking with him provisions for the day, and did not return until nine in the evening.
Here was a glorious opportunity! I had the whole of the day to cultivate the acquaintance of his charming wife, and the satisfaction of observing that each succeeding day she appeared to experience greater pleasure from
