sufferings, I tremble at the bare recollection of the dreadful anguish I suffered when he reduced my chastity to a bleeding ruin. I soon found it was useless to struggle or resist, I was a mere child in his arms; as to strength, he moved and placed me just as was convenient to his pleasure. I quickly felt his finger again introducing the head of that terrible engine I had before felt, and which now felt like a pillar of ivory entering me.
Directly he had secured its head within me, he withdrew his hand, placed his arm round my neck, and drew my lips to his. At this moment I was nearly insensible to everything he did, so much were my feelings overcome by fear and shame. But I was not doomed to remain long in this state, for I quickly felt him forcing his way into me, with a fury that caused me to scream with anguish. My petitions, supplications and tears were of no use. I was on the altar, and, butcher-like, he was determined to complete the sacrifice; indeed, my cries seemed only to excite him to the finishing of my ruin, and sucking my lips and breasts with fury, he unrelentingly rooted up all obstacles my virginity offered, tearing and cutting me to pieces, until the complete junction of our bodies announced that the whole of his terrible shaft was buried within me. I could bear the dreadful torment no longer: uttering a piercing cry I sank insensible in the arms of my cruel ravisher.
How long I continued in this happy state of insensibility, I know not, but I was brought back to life feeling the same thrilling agony which caused my fainting. Still grasped in his arms, I felt him moving up and down upon me with a force and energy that made me feel every motion of the instrument which I was impaled upon like the cutting of a knife. Every thrust he made was followed by some ejaculation, such as, ‘Delirious creature, how tight she is! Holy Mahomet, I thank you. Oh!
Ah', who would be without it There sweet infidel,' as he drove himself up to the hilt in me, with many other words in the Turkish language which I did not understand, until the fury of his thrusts became so cruelly savage that I a second time fainted.
Stretched beyond bearing, as I may say I was, by the instrument of my martyrdom before my second fainting, I now in spite of my suffering could not help being considerably surprised at the very great alteration I experienced, although I most sensibly felt it, but still it had lost most of that fierce stiffness with which it first tore me to pieces.
Whilst my mind was thus occupied with reflections on this novel change, my astonishment was augmented by feeling it as it were, by degrees, assuming all its former strength and erection within me, while the Dey was amusing himself with sucking my lips, me nipples of my breasts, and arranging my hair over my shoulders and bosom, in various ways to please his fancy, also moving my face into different positions, as he said, to see which way it appeared the most lovelyuntil the return of the same cruel distention of the parts painfully informed me his instrument had recovered its fierce condition.
The Dey now withdrew it all but the head, which he left between the lips of the sheath, which it had so lately formed for itself, and having with his hand satisfied himself as to its strength for performing the third assault, he withdrew his hand and keeping me firmly to his bosom, at one tremendous thrust drove it up into me, distending the tender, wounded and torn parts, until the mutual mixture of our hair stopped his further progress. He now lay for some time quiet in my arms, to all appearance from his various exclamations swimming in a sea of pleasure, sucking my breast and neck, until they became quite sore; all the time I lay gasping and stretched beyond bearing. Soon again I felt me commencement of his dreadful thrusts-at first, to be sure, they were not quite so fierce; but as his feelings were excited by enjoyment, so did the fury of his movements increase. I could not restrain my cries, and just at the moment his lunges were creating an anguish intolerable, a loud knocking at his door caused the Dey to jump from my arms. So dreadful was the anguish from the sudden way in which the cause of my suffering was withdrawn from me, that I again fainted. When I recovered, I found myself tying in the arms of the Dey, who was anxiously watching over me. He then informed me that the disturbance which had forced him so precipitately to leave my embraces was occasioned by one of his eunuchs coming to inform him of a sudden invasion of part of his territories by some Arabs which rendered it necessary he should immediately proceed to join his troops; but he swore by his Prophet severely to chastise them for disturbing him in a scene of pleasure so truly delicious-so he termed my ruin and shame. After kissing me over and over again, and bestowing various other caresses, he arose and retired through a sliding panel by the bedside, leaving me in the theatre of my undoing overpowered with anguish, more dead than alive. My sufferings, weakness and agitation soon threw me into slumber, in which my ruin and misery were for a time forgotten. Dreadful, indeed, were my sufferings in being deflowered. Never was poor maid so unceremoniously debauched, nor is it possible for anyone to suffer more cruel anguish than I did, in receiving my first lesson from this powerful Turk.
I did not awake from the refreshing sleep I so soundly fell into until late next morning. Upon attempting to rise, I found I was unable, from the dreadful stiffness of the parts that had been so terribly and unmercifully stretched. Unable to rise, I was obliged to remain in the scene of my undoing until the slaves came to awake me. With their assistance I got out of bed. Had you seen the sheets, you would indeed have pitied your poor friend. I found by the care, tenderness and respect with which I was treated that the Bey's orders respecting me must have been very particular.
I learned that he was not expected to return for some time. This news, being unexpected on my part^ acted as reprieve would upon a condemned criminal. It, of course, contributed considerably to soothe my wounded feelings; but at the end of a week, just as the flurry of my spirits had in some measure subsided to a degree of composure, I was again thrown into a state of alarm on being informed of his return, as well as his intention to pass that very night with me. I had just retired to bed when the communication was made to me, and his orders were scarcely delivered ere he was in my chamber. The news of his arrival had thrown me into a kind of stupor, from which I did not recover until his fierce kisses brought me to a sense of collection, when I found my second martyrdom was about to commence. You may be assured, from what I have already described of him, that I had nothing to expect from supplication or entreaties; still I did not fail to use them, supported by torrents of tears. These he paid no regard to, but took me in his arms, drawing me to his bosom and calling me foolish and silly to make such opposition to his pleasures. ‘Reason a little,' said he, drawing my lips to his, ‘consider the indispensable necessity that all loving creatures like yourself are under to lose the sweet flower I so lately gathered from you, which seems to have been so dear to you; consider the great end that nature has created you for, give over these unavailing tears, which only delay your tasting of the sweetest joys.
Then you talk about your virtue-pray, can you tell me in what it consists?' cried he, sucking my lips. I could only answer with tears. ‘Do you think,' said he, ‘if I enjoy you against your will, you are a bit the less virtuous? Or is it possible,' he continued, ‘that you are so simple as to believe that virtue depends upon any part of your beautiful body being a little larger or a little less. Of what consideration can it be to Ali whether this part is opened or unopened by man?' and to make me understand the part he meant, he forced his hand between my thighs, where his fiery touches left me in no doubt as to the part he alluded to.
He then was proceeding to place me in a situation convenient to satisfy his desires, but because I resisted his attempts, he flew upon me like a tiger, forcibly turned me on my back and divided my thighs; indeed, I found resistance of no avail.
The few days he had been absent seemed to have augmented his desires into a kind of frenzy. I cannot give you anything like a description of my sufferings as he now again forced his dreadful engine into me. The pain I felt was as cruel as when he first deflowered me. The chamber resounded with my shrieks. But he heeded them not; on the contrary, he increased the fury of his thrusts. Three times in the course of a quarter of an hour did I faint in his arms from the dreadful anguish.
On recovering I found, during my last insensibility, he had got off me. I cannot tell whether my tears and cries had made any impression on him, or what induced him to get out of bed; but he went to a closet in the room, where I plainly saw him anointing his instrument out of the contents of a small jar. After cleansing his hands, he returned to bed. It was not long ere he again got between my thighs. I lay trembling, expecting the cruel torment; but guess my astonishment when instead of experiencing the thrilling pain which had before always accompanied his penetration I felt him drive it into me up to the very hilt comparatively with no more pain than made me cry out two or three ‘Ohs'; but I still felt an extreme tightness accompanied with heated stretching. When I had received him up to the very quick, he tenderly kissed me, and asked if he hurt as much as before. I could not answer such a question, but I believe my blushes must have satisfied him on the point. Indeed, so great was the difference I now felt that I sustained this assault with very little suffering, until nature, unable longer to bear the tumult of pleasure with which the Dey seemed agitated, assisted him, and I for the first time felt with indescribable emotion something warm flowing from him in rapid streams, which deliciously cooled the parts he had so potently warmed. As I felt the last drop ejected from him, he sank on my bosom, without the least sign of animation, stretching
