followed by one of the chambermaids carrying a bathtub. Placing it in the middle of the room, the girl filled it with warm water. Then she went away, but Dinah remained.
Since I had taken my bath in the morning, I could not understand why the girl had again filled the tub- and with hot water too. I was not in the habit of bathing in hot water. I don’t want a bath, Dinah, I said.
No, Missy, I knows you don’t, you is bootiful clean. But I’se had orders in de letters from de Massa to give you a scented bath. I must obey his orders, whatever dey is, or he will whip me. Now den, honey, you’ll let me give you de bath.
I flushed with a strong feeling of indignation. I also felt deeply humiliated. The victim was to be bathed and perfumed before the sacrifice!
However, Dinah had to obey orders, so I told her that she might bathe me. She evidently was relieved, and at once began to prepare the scented bath.
First she poured some fluid from a phial into the water; next she threw in a quantity of white powder, which had a delicate perfume of roses; then she stirred the water until the powder was completely dissolved. (I found out afterwards that the fluid and the powder were Turkish preparations used by the ladies of a harem to impart a softness and gloss to their skins.) When everything was ready, she undressed me. Then, making me stand up in the bath, she sponged me all over with the warm, perfumed water, at the same time praising the symmetry and plumpness of my figure and the whiteness of my skin. When she had finished bathing me, she dried me with soft, warm towels, then rubbed me with her hands from head to foot and with her fingers gently kneaded my breasts and arms, also my bottom, thighs and legs, until my flesh seemed to become firmer and my skin smoother and more velvety than usual.
She then began to dress me, putting on my nicest things. She first put on me a lace-trimmed chemise with blue ribbons on the shoulders, then my finest drawers with deep lace frilling and bows of pink ribbon at the knees. Next she drew on my legs a pair of white silk stockings, fastening them above my knees with dark blue satin garters with silver buckles.
Then she cased my feet in my neatest shoes, put on my nicest petticoats and laced me tightly in my stays. Finally she put on me my prettiest white frock. Then she brushed my hair and arranged it most elaborately.
She was delighted with my appearance and, after turning me around two or three times, exclaimed: Oh Missy! You is a bootiful young lady for true. De Massa will be pleased when he sees you.
Dinah knew that she had bathed, perfumed and dressed me for the sacrifice, but she did not understand what a dreadful thing it would be to me. She was not a virtuous woman herself, and her ideas, like those of most slave women, were very loose on the subject of feminine virtue. Besides, I think that she considered me a lucky young lady to have attracted the notice of De Massa, who in her eyes was a very exalted personage indeed.
Now that I was dressed, she suggested that I go to the drawing room so as to be in readiness to receive the master on his return. Accordingly I went down to the great room, which had been brilliantly lighted, and seated myself on a sofa. I had become dully resigned to my fate, but my heart was heavy as I waited in the gorgeous apartment for the man who was going to rob me of my virginity. If I had had the slightest liking for him I should not have felt the thing so much. But I did not like him. I hated him.
Presently I heard the sound of wheels on the terrace. Then I heard the hall door being opened and shut. He had arrived! My heart began to flutter, though not with the pleasurable anticipation of a young girl wafting for her lover.
But Randolph did not make his appearance, so I supposed that he had gone straight to his own room to change his traveling garments. Such was the case. In a short time he came into the drawing room, dressed in evening clothes.
I rose from my seat. He came to me, took both my hands in his and kissed me hotly on the lips, making me shrink and tremble. Then, holding me at arms’ length, he looked at me from head to foot in a critical way, as if he were appraising my charms, while I stood with flaming cheeks and downcast eyes.
You are looking very charming, Dolly, he said. The frock you are wearing becomes you, but in future you must always put on a low-necked dress for dinner. He already considered me his property!
I have not got one, I murmured, without looking up.
Well, you soon shall have more than one, he observed, laughing and patting me on the; cheek. Now tell me. Have you been comfortable during my absence? Has Dinah taken good care of you? Have the servants been attentive?
I did not answer the first part of his question, for, though my body had been comfortable after it had recovered from the first severe effects of the punishment, my mind had been extremely uncomfortable the whole time. I replied: Dinah has taken very good care of me, and the servants have been most attentive.
So much the better for them. If they had not, I would have made all their bottoms smart, from Dinah downwards, he observed coolly.
His words jarred me. I thought that he need not have said anything about the women’s bottoms. But what could I say?-
He next asked two or three other questions, which I answered, Then one of the parlormaids announced dinner and we went into the big dining room.
The table had been beautifully decorated with flowers and fruit. The glass, linen and other appointments were of the finest description, and the great sideboard of old, polished mahogany glittered with massive silver plate which had been in Randolph’s family for generations. The dinner was of many courses, with all sorts of dishes which I had never heard of, and it was accompanied by wines whose names also were new to me.
Randolph talked away gaily, eating heartily and drinking a bottle of champagne. I, being nervous and depressed, hardly ate anything. I could only answer in monosyllables, and I blushed whenever I happened to catch his eye. I was thinking constantly of the dreadful thing he was going to do to me that night.
In order (I suppose) to cheer me up, he filled my glass with champagne and insisted that I drink it. But the wine only went to my head and made me giddy without exhilarating me in the least. When he saw the effect which the liquor had on me he did not give me any more.
When dinner was over and he had smoked a cigar, we went back to the drawing room.
Seating himself comfortably in an easy chair, he continued to talk, not taking any notice of my silence or making any remark about my downcast looks. He was in high spirits, induced, I suppose, by the thought that he soon would be in possession of my virgin body. He told me that he had heard that Miss Dean had got safely home to Philadelphia, and he added with a laugh: I don’t think that the prim Quakeress will ever again take to running an ’underground station.’ She got a real smart whipping and she will always carry the marks of it on her bottom. But you won’t be marked in the least, Dolly, as your skin was not cut.
I shuddered, and my bottom seemed to tingle as I thought of the whipping.
At ten o’clock he rose from his seat and said jocularly: Now, Dolly, since this is our wedding night, we’ll go to bed early. Come upstairs.
I blushed furiously and began to cry. After all, I could not resign myself quietly to my unhappy fate. I thought that I had become resigned, but now that the moment had arrived, all my feelings of modesty rose in revolt against the sacrifice of my maidenhead.
I made a last despairing appeal for mercy. Oh! Mr. Randolph! I exclaimed. Will you not spare me?
His countenance grew dark, he frowned and a hard look came into his eyes. Don’t be a fool, Dolly, he answered harshly, You gave me your promise, and I thought that the whole affair was settled. Come along.
Oh, do not hold me to my promise! I wailed. You know that when I made it I was half-mad with pain. Oh! Do let me go away from your house.
Now listen to me, he said in cold, incisive tones. I am not going to stand any nonsense. You are completely in my power, and I don’t intend to spare you, as you call it. If you do not come upstairs and submit quietly, I’ll have you carried up by four of the women, and I will make them hold you down upon the bed, so that I shall be able to do what I like to you at my ease. Now will you come quietly, or must you be carried up and held?
My appeal for mercy had failed, and I was thoroughly frightened by his threats. To be held down by four women while the deed was being done would only add to my shame. The very idea of such a thing made me shiver with horror. Resistance being useless, there was nothing left for me but to submit.
I will go quietly. I sobbed in a low voice, with the tears trickling down my cheeks. (Oh! how wretched I felt as
