mood. He thought much of his past life, declaring to himself the truth of those words in which he had told his sister-in-law that his heart had ever been kinder than his words. But the world, and all those nearest to him in the world, had judged him always by his words rather than by his heart. They had taken the appearance, which he could not command or alter, rather than the facts, of which he had been the master. Had he not been good to all his relations?—and yet was there one among them that cared for him? 'I'm almost sorry that they are going to stay,' he said to himself;—'I know that I shall disappoint them.' Yet when he met Bell at the Manor House he accosted her cheerily, telling her with much appearance of satisfaction that that flitting into Guestwick was not to be accomplished.
'I am so glad,' said she. 'It is long since I wished it.'
'And I do not think your mother wishes it now.'
'I am sure she does not. It was all a misunderstanding from the first. When some of us could not do all that you wished, we thought it better—' Then Bell paused, finding that she would get herself into a mess if she persevered.
'We will not say any more about it,' said the squire. 'The thing is over, and I am very glad that it should be so pleasantly settled. I was talking to Dr Crofts yesterday.'
'Were you, uncle?'
'Yes; and he is to come and stay with me the day before he is married. We have arranged it all. And we'll have the breakfast up at the Great House. Only you must fix the day. I should say some time in May. And, my dear, you'll want to make yourself fine; here's a little money for you. You are to spend that before your marriage, you know.' Then he shambled away, and as soon as he was alone, again became sad and despondent. He was a man for whom we may predicate some gentle sadness and continued despondency to the end of his life's chapter.
We left John Eames in the custody of Lady Julia, who had overtaken him in the act of erasing Lily's name from the railing which ran across the brook. He had been premeditating an escape home to his mother's house in Guestwick, and thence hack to London, without making any further appearance at the Manor House. But as soon as he heard Lady Julia's step, and saw her figure close upon him, he knew that his retreat was cut off from him. So he allowed himself to be led away quietly up to the house. With Lady Julia herself he openly discussed the whole matter,—telling her that his hopes were over, his happiness gone, and his heart half-broken. Though he would perhaps have cared but little for her congratulations in success, he could make himself more amenable to consolation and sympathy from her than from any other inmate in the earl's house. 'I don't know what I shall say to your brother,' he whispered to her, as they approached the side door at which she intended to enter.
'Will you let me break it to him? After that he will say a few words to you of course, but you need not be afraid of him.'
'And Mr Dale?' said Johnny. 'Everybody has heard about it. Everybody will know what a fool I have made myself.' She suggested that the earl should speak to the squire, assured him that nobody would think him at all foolish, and then left him to make his way up to his own bedroom. When there he found a letter from Cradell, which had been delivered in his absence; but the contents of that letter may best be deferred to the next chapter. They were not of a nature to give him comfort or to add to his sorrow.
About an hour before dinner there was a knock at his door, and the earl himself, when summoned, made his appearance in the room. He was dressed in his usual farming attire, having been caught by Lady Julia on his first approach to the house, and had come away direct to his young friend, after having been duly trained in what he ought to say by his kind-hearted sister. I am not, however, prepared to declare that he strictly followed his sister's teaching in all that he said upon the occasion.
'Well, my boy,' he began, 'so the young lady has been perverse.'
'Yes, my lord. That is, I don't know about being perverse. It is all over.'
'That's as may be, Johnny. As far as I know, not half of them accept their lovers the first time of asking.'
'I shall not ask her again.'
'Oh, yes, you will. You don't mean to say you are angry with her for refusing you.'
'Not in the least. I have no right to be angry. I am only angry with myself for being such a fool, Lord De Guest. I wish I had been dead before I came down here on this errand. Now I think of it, I know there are so many things which ought to have made me sure how it would be.'
'I don't see that at all. You come down again,—let me see,—it's May now. Say you come when the shooting begins in September. If we can't get you leave of absence in any other way, we'll make old Buffle come too. Only, by George, I believe he'd shoot us all. But never mind; we'll manage that. You keep up your spirits till September, and then we'll fight the battle in another way. The squire shall get up a
