Envy

if he’d been a sophomore), and when he wasn’t dressed like a cowboy, he was at least passably cute. Or at least acceptable. The ears were still too big and the thick-framed glasses still a no go, but she could at least handle the freckles. After all, they matched her own.

The dinner itself had gone, well… okay. Miranda was wearing the sexy new outfit she’d impulse bought the other day, and while she was still slightly afraid it made her look like a thick-trunked tree, she told herself she probably looked okay. And Greg, once you stripped away the nervousness that apparently made him act like a dick, was a pretty nice guy with an easy laugh. He seemed fun, witty, smart, and-what should have been the best part- totally into Miranda.

And that was the problem. Yes, it was great to be adored, but it wasn’t enough. Because when she looked at him, all Miranda could think was: Yeah, he’s okay.

As they walked toward the coffee shop together, he took her hand-and she let him. It wasn’t unpleasant, it was just-neutral. Maybe this is how it’s supposed to be, she told herself. Girl likes boy, boy likes girl-maybe the sparks come later. Maybe love at first sight is for suckers and Hilary Duff movies. Maybe, out in the real world, being smart and nice and funny and kind of cute was enough. No wild heartbeats, no movie-star good looks, no rapt gazing into each other’s eyes-just good food, good conversation… and an okay time.

That’s what she told herself, at least, as they strolled through the night hand in hand. And she was almost convinced. Then they stepped inside the coffee shop.

And there he was.

Movie star good looks.

Her heart beating wildly.

Her gaze drawn inexorably to his.

Kane. And in an instant, she remembered what it was to feel, to want, to crave the touch of someone’s hands, his lips, to glow under the warmth of his smile, to light up when he was around, to suddenly forget the existence of everyone else in the room. In the world. To look at other girls, foolish girls, and think, How can they not see what I see?

There was one guy in that room who made Miranda catch her breath with desire-and it wasn’t the one she’d come in with.

He sat at a table with Harper and Kaia. (It was only later that it would occur to her to wonder what Harper- supposedly home studying-was doing out with Kane, or what either of them was doing with Kaia, of all people. But that was later.)

“Miranda!” Kane called out, catching sight of her and Greg and waving them over.

Miranda pulled Greg over to the table to say hello. She tried not to drool.

“Small world,” she commented.

“Small town” Kaia snorted, and excused herself to get more sugar for her, as she put it, “sorry excuse for a macchiato.”

“What are you guys doing here?” Miranda asked.

Harper shot Kane a cryptic look. “Study break,” she said quickly. Then she noticed what Miranda was wearing, and her eyes widened in surprise. “That shirt-I thought-when did you get it?”

Miranda did a little twirl. “You like?”

“It’s…”

“It’s ravishing,” Kane said with an approving grin. “No offense to your date here, but you keep dressing like that and he’s going to have himself some serious competition.”

Miranda flushed with pleasure. It was the first time Kane had ever given her a compliment on how she looked-maybe the outfit had done its job. Maybe Kane would finally start seeing her in a new light, as more than just a snarky brainiac. Or maybe Harper was right, and seeing her with another guy had made him jealous and-

Oh, right. Another guy.

She suddenly remembered Greg, who was standing quietly, obediently beside her. Shit.

They’d decided on coffee instead of alcohol, since Kane had a long night of Photoshopping ahead of him. And it had seemed a fine choice-until Miranda and her date walked in. Harper almost spat out her mochaccino at the site of her. In that outfit. Fortunately, it seemed Miranda was too dazzled by Kane’s presence to wonder what the trio was doing there together. That was the silver lining-the black cloud, of course, was that Harper could tell from the queasy look on Miranda’s face that this Greg thing wasn’t going to work.

Not a big surprise-Greg was scrawny, gawky, and worst of all, bland. Under normal circumstances, Harper would have given him the big thumbs down-Miranda could do way better.

But these weren’t normal circumstances, and she was going to have to take what Miranda could get. Which, at the moment, was a geeky, gawky loser. That, however, was a problem for another time-for tomorrow. Tonight she was still riding high on her triumph, and once Miranda was gone, she could continue celebrating in peace.

As Kane and Kaia bantered flirtatiously back and forth about who had the hottest drink, Harper zoned out, letting the conversation wash over her. The plan was set in motion now, and it was only a matter of time before the big payoff. She didn’t know how she was going to make it through the next couple days, hoping that nothing went wrong, that no one-including herself-lost their nerve, and knowing that by the end of the week, if all went according to plan, she and Adam would finally be together. And when that happened, she knew, she would stop all this ridiculous worrying about what she’d done and who she’d betrayed-because being with Adam would feel so right, it would justify anything that had happened along the way. She couldn’t wait.

Kane lifted his mug and proposed a toast.

“To getting what we want,” he proclaimed, “by any means possible.”

They clinked glasses and drank up. Harper smiled weakly, suddenly glad he hadn’t suggested an alternate toast: “To getting what we deserve.”

“Can you guys just shut up for one second?” Beth screamed in frustration. But it was no use. Her bratty brothers continued their hyperactive race through the house, hollering and squealing as they clomped up and down the stairs. Disaster was inevitable. Whether it would be one of the twins colliding with a heavy piece of furniture or Beth’s head exploding (or some combination of the two, featuring an irate babysitter and a blunt object), she didn’t know. But she did know she couldn’t take this much longer. The stress of the SATs always looming over her, the fight she’d had with Adam eating away at her, and now, these brats. The world was conspiring to drive her insane.

Not that she didn’t love her little brothers.

And maybe, if their house had been fully stocked with all that stuff supposed to keep five-year-olds in check- PlayStation, cable TV, DVD collection-she wouldn’t have minded spending day after day after day with them. But her family couldn’t afford any of that stuff. So the twins just had Beth-and each other. Normally, Adam would be here, occupying the twins with one of those lame magic tricks they loved, or teaching them how to tie different kinds of knots. Adam was an only child, and always claimed he was jealous of her “adorable” little brothers. “If you think they’re so cute,” Beth usually responded, “take them home with you. Please.” But she had to admit that, when Adam was around, even she found her brothers kind of cute-he brought something out in them. And in himself.

But she and Adam weren’t speaking to each other-hadn’t since the day before, when he’d left her in the middle of the highway and sped away, covering her in a cloud of dust. She was on her own with the babysitting thing tonight, and that meant she had two options: continue to yell and scream, which would neither get the twins to shut up nor get her any closer to that perfect score-or bribe them with ice cream sundaes.

As always, it worked like a charm. Jeff and Sam, who, when they were silent, looked almost cherubic with their big blue eyes and curly blond hair, sat side by side at the table in front of their heaping bowls of ice cream, chocolate sauce, and a cherry for each. Their legs dangled several inches from the floor, swinging back and forth as they dug into their frozen treasure.

“Bethie, can I ask you a question?” Jeff asked, slurping down a spoonful of Rocky Road.

“Sure,” she said, expecting to have to explain why the sky was blue or why Daddy smelled strange and acted so funny when he came home late at night.

“Is Kane your boyfriend now?”

“What? No, of course not,” she said quickly. Kane had been over at the house a lot lately, studying-but she hadn’t realized that her brothers had noticed.