I've spoilt Addie's birthday, and all your day. Please, I'm very sorry!'
She said this so sadly and earnestly, that Lady de la Poer came and gave her a kind hiss of forgiveness, and said:
'Never mind, the girls are very happy with their father, and the rest is good for me.'
Kate thought this very comfortable and kind, and clung to the kind hand gratefully; but though it was a fine occasion for one of the speeches she could have composed in private, all that came out of her mouth was, 'How horrid it is--the way everything turns out with me!'
'Nay, things need not turn out horrid, if a certain little girl would keep herself from being silly.'
'But I AM a silly little girl!' cried Kate with emphasis. 'Uncle Wardour says he never saw such a silly one, and so does Aunt Barbara!'
'Well, my dear,' said Lady de la Poer very calmly, 'when clever people take to being silly, they can be sillier than anyone else.'
'Clever people!' cried Kate half breathlessly.
'Yes,' said the lady, 'you are a clever child; and if you made the most of yourself, you could be very sensible, and hinder yourself from being foolish and unguarded, and getting into scrapes.'
Kate gasped. It was not pleasant to be in a scrape; and yet her whole self recoiled from being guarded and watchful, even though for the first time she heard she was not absolutely foolish. She began to argue, 'I was naughty, I know, to teaze Mary; and Mary at home would not have let me; but I could not help the tumbling into the pond. I wanted to get out of the way of the lightning.'
'Now, Kate, you ARE trying to show how silly you can make yourself.'
'But I can't bear thunder and lightning. It frightens me so, I don't know what to do; and Aunt Jane is just as bad. She always has the shutters shut.'
'Your Aunt Jane has had her nerves weakened by bad health; but you are young and strong, and you ought to fight with fanciful terrors.'
'But it is not fancy about lightning. It does kill people.'
'A storm is very awful, and is one of the great instances of God's power. He does sometimes allow His lightnings to fall; but I do not think it can be quite the thought of this that terrifies you, Kate, for the recollection of His Hand is comforting.'
'No,' said Kate honestly, 'it is not thinking of that. It is that the glare--coming no one knows when--and the great rattling clap are so--so frightful!'
'Then, my dear, I think all you can do is to pray not only for protection from lightning and tempest, but that you may be guarded from the fright that makes you forget to watch yourself, and so renders the danger greater! You could not well have been drowned where you fell; but if it had been a river--'
'I know,' said Kate.
'And try to get self-command. That is the great thing, after all, that would hinder things from being horrid!' said Lady de la Poer, with a pleasant smile, just as a knock came to the door, and the maid announced that it was five o'clock, and Miss's things were quite ready; and in return she was thanked, and desired to bring them up.
'Miss!' said Kate, rather hurt: 'don't they know who we are?'
'It is not such a creditable adventure that we should wish to make your name known,' said Lady de la Poer, rather drily; and Kate blushed, and became ashamed of herself.
She was really five minutes before she recovered the use of her tongue, and that was a long time for her. Lady de la Poer meantime was helping her to dress, as readily as Josephine herself could have done, and brushing out the hair, which was still damp. Kate presently asked where the old lady was.
'She had to go back as soon as the rain was over, to look after a nephew and niece, who are spending the day with her. She said she would look for our party, and tell them how we were getting on.'
'Then I have spoilt three people's pleasure more!' said Kate ruefully. 'Is the niece a little girl?'
'I don't know; I fancy her grown up, or they would have offered clothes to you.'
'Then I don't care!' said Kate.
'What for?'
'Why, for not telling my name. Once it would have been like a fairy tale to Sylvia and me, and have made up for anything, to see a countess--especially a little girl. But don't you think seeing me would quite spoil that?'
Lady de la Poer was so much amused, that she could not answer at first; and Kate began to feel as if she had been talking foolishly, and turned her back to wash her hands.
'Certainly, I don't think we are quite as well worth seeing as the Crystal Palace! You put me in mind of what Madame Campan said. She had been governess to the first Napoleon's sisters; and when, in the days of their grandeur, she visited them, one of them asked her if she was not awe-struck to find herself among so much royalty. 'Really,' she said, 'I can't be much afraid of queens whom I have whipped!''
'They were only mock queens,' said Kate.
'Very true. But, little woman, it is ALL mockery, unless it is the SELF that makes the impression; and I am afraid being perched upon any kind of pedestal makes little faults and follies do more harm to others. But come, put on your hat: we must not keep Papa waiting.'
The hat was the worst part of the affair; the colour of the blue edge of the ribbon had run into the white, and the pretty soft feather had been so daggled in the wet, that an old hen on a wet day was respectability itself compared with it, and there was nothing for it but to take it out; and even then the hat reminded Kate of a certain Amelia Matilda Bunny, whose dirty finery was a torment and a by-word in St. James's Parsonage. Her frock and white jacket had been so nicely ironed out, as to show no traces of the adventure; and she disliked all the more to disfigure herself with such a thing on her head for the present, as well as to encounter Aunt Barbara by-and- by.
'There's no help for it,' said Lady de la Poer, seeing her disconsolately surveying it; 'perhaps it will not be bad for you to feel a few consequences from your heedlessness.'
Whether it were the hat or the shock, Kate was uncommonly meek and subdued as she followed Lady de la Poer out of the room; and after giving the little maid half a sovereign and many thanks for having so nicely repaired the damage, they walked back to the palace, and up the great stone stairs, Kate hanging down her head, thinking that everyone was wondering how Amelia Matilda Bunny came to be holding by the hand of a lady in a beautiful black lace bonnet and shawl, so quiet and simple, and yet such a lady!
She hardly even looked up when the glad exclamations of the four girls and their father sounded around her, and she could not bear their inquiries whether she felt well again. She knew that she owed thanks to Mary and her father, and apologies to them all; but she had not manner enough to utter them, and only made a queer scrape with her foot, like a hen scratching out corn, hung her head, and answered 'Yes.'
They saw she was very much ashamed, and they were in a hurry besides; so when Lord de la Poer had said he had given all manner of thanks to the good old lady, he took hold of Kate's hand, as if he hardly ventured to let go of her again, and they all made the best of their way to the station, and were soon in full career along the line, Kate's heart sinking as she thought of Aunt Barbara. Fanny tried kindly to talk to her; but she was too anxious to listen, made a short answer, and kept her eyes fixed on the two heads of the party, who were in close consultation, rendered private by the noise of the train.
'If ever I answer for anyone again!' said Lord de la Poer. 'And now for facing Barbara!'
'You had better let me do that.'
'What! do you think I am afraid?' and Kate thought the smile on his lip very cruel, as she could not hear his words.
'I don't do you much injustice in thinking so,' as he shrugged up his shoulders like a boy going to be punished; 'but I think Barbara considers you as an accomplice in mischief, and will have more mercy if I speak.'
'Very well! I'm not the man to prevent you. Tell Barbara I'll undergo whatever she pleases, for having ever let go the young lady's hand! She may have me up to the Lord Chancellor if she pleases!'
A little relaxation in the noise made these words audible; and Kate, who knew the Lord Chancellor had some power over her, and had formed her notions of him from a picture, in a history book at home, of Judge Jefferies holding the Bloody Assize, began to get very much frightened; and her friends saw her eyes growing round with alarm, and not knowing the exact cause, pitied her; Lord de la Poer seated her upon his knee, and told her that Mamma would take her home, and take care Aunt Barbara did not punish her.
'I don't think she will punish me,' said Kate; 'she does not often! But pray come home with me!' she added,
