engagement; and there was a likeness of mind between the father and daughter that could not but develop more in this year, than in all Ethel's life, when she had made the most rapid progress. Perhaps, too, the doctor looked on Margaret rather as the authority and mistress of his house, while Ethel was more of a playfellow; and thus, without either having the least suspicion that the one sister was taking the place of the other, and without any actual neglect of Margaret, Ethel was his chief companion.
'How excited and anxious Norman looks!' said Margaret, one day, when he had rushed in at the dinner-hour, asking for his father, and, when he could not find him, shouting out for Ethel. 'I hope there is nothing amiss. He has looked thin and worn for some time, and yet his work at school is very easy to him.'
'I wish there maybe nothing wrong there again,' said Flora. 'There! there's the front door banging! He is off! Ethel!--' stepping to the door, and calling in her sister, who came from the street door, her hair blowing about with the wind. 'What did Norman want?'
'Only to know whether papa had left a note for Dr. Hoxton,' said Ethel, looking very confused and very merry.
'That was not all,' said Flora. 'Now don't be absurd, Ethel--I hate mysteries.'
'Last time I had a secret you would not believe it,' said Ethel, laughing.
'Come!' exclaimed Flora, 'why cannot you tell us at once what is going on?'
'Because I was desired not,' said Ethel. 'You will hear it soon enough,' and she capered a little.
'Let her alone, Flora,' said Margaret. 'I see there is nothing wrong.'
'If she is desired to be silent, there is nothing to be said,' replied Flora, sitting down again, while Ethel ran away to guard her secret.
'Absurd!' muttered Flora. 'I cannot imagine why Ethel is always making mysteries!'
'She cannot help other people having confidence in her,' said Margaret gently.
'She need not be so important, then,' said Flora--'always having private conferences with papa! I do not think it is at all fair on the rest.'
'Ethel is a very superior person,' said Margaret, with half a sigh.
Flora might toss her head, but she attempted no denial in words. 'And,' continued Margaret, 'if papa does find her his best companion and friend we ought to be glad of it.'
'I do not call it just,' said Flora.
'I do not think it can be helped,' said Margaret: 'the best must be preferred.
'As to that, Ethel is often very ridiculous and silly.'
'She is improving every day; and you know dear mamma always thought her the finest character amongst us.'
'Then you are ready to be left out, and have your third sister always put before you?'
'No, Flora, that is not the case. Neither she nor papa would ever be unfair; but, as she would say herself, what they can't help, they can't help; and, as she grows older, she must surpass me more and more.'
'And you like it? '
'I like it--when--when I think of papa, and of his dear, noble Ethel. I do like it, when I am not selfish.'
Margaret turned away her head, but presently looked up again.
'Only, Flora,' she said, 'pray do not say one word of this, on any account, to Ethel. She is so happy with papa, and I would not for anything have her think I feel neglected, or had any jealousy.'
'Ah,' thought Flora, 'you can give up sweetly, but you have Alan to fall back upon. Now I, who certainly have the best right, and a great deal more practical sense--'
Flora took Margaret's advice, and did not reproach Ethel, for a little reflection convinced her that she should make a silly figure in so doing, and she did not like altercations.
It was the same evening that Norman came in from school with his hands full of papers, and, with one voice, his father and Ethel exclaimed, 'You have them?'
'Yes;' and he gave the letter to his father, while Blanche, who had a very inquisitive pair of eyes, began to read from a paper he placed on the table.
''Norman Walter, son of Richard and Margaret May, High Street, Doctor of Medicine, December 21st, 18--. Thomas Ramsden.''
'What is that for, Norman?' and, as he did not attend, she called Mary to share her speculations, and spell out the words.
'Ha!' cried Dr. May, 'this is capital! The old doctor seems not to know how to say enough for you. Have you read it?'
'No, he only told me he had said something in my favour, and wished me all success.'
'Success!' cried Mary. 'Oh, Norman, you are not going to sea too?'
'No, no!' interposed Blanche knowingly--' he is going to be married. I heard nurse wish her brother success when he was going to marry the washerwoman with a red face.'
'No,' said Mary, 'people never are married till they are twenty.'
'But I tell you,' persisted Blanche, 'people always write like this, in a great book in church, when they are married. I know, for we always go into church with Lucy and nurse when there is a wedding.'
'Well, Norman, I wish you success with the bride you are to court,' said Dr. May, much diverted with the young ladies' conjectures.
'But is it really?' said Mary, making her eyes as round as full moons.
'Is it really?' repeated Blanche. 'Oh, dear! is Norman going to be married? I wish it was to be Meta Rivers, for then I could always ride her dear little white pony.'
'Tell them,' whispered Norman, a good deal out of countenance, as he leaned over Ethel, and quitted the room.
Ethel cried, 'Now then!' and looked at her father, while Blanche and Mary reiterated inquiries--marriage, and going to sea, being the only events that, in their imagination, the world could furnish. Going to try for a Balliol scholarship! It was a sad falling off, even if they understood what it meant. The doctor's explanations to Margaret had a tone of apology for having kept her in ignorance, and Flora said few words, but felt herself injured; she had nearly gone to Mrs. Hoxton that afternoon, and how strange it would have been if anything had been said to her of her own brother's projects, when she was in ignorance.
Ethel slipped away to her brother, who was in his own room, surrounded with books, flushed and anxious, and trying to glance over each subject on which he felt himself weak.
'I shall fail! I know I shall!' was his exclamation. 'I wish I had never thought of it!'
'What? did Dr. Hoxton think you not likely to succeed?' cried Ethel, in consternation.
'Oh! he said I was certain, but what is that? We Stoneborough men only compare ourselves with each other. I shall break down to a certainty, and my father will be disappointed.'
'You will do your best?'
'I don't know that. My best will all go away when it comes to the point.'
'Surely not. It did not go away last time you were examined, and why should it now?'
'I tell you, Ethel, you know nothing about it. I have not got up half what I meant to have done. Here, do take this book--try me whether I know this properly.'
So they went on, Ethel doing her best to help and encourage, and Norman in an excited state of restless despair, which drove away half his senses and recollection, and his ideas of the superior powers of public schoolboys magnifying every moment. They were summoned downstairs to prayers, but went up again at once, and more than an hour subsequently, when their father paid one of his domiciliary visits, there they still were, with their Latin and Greek spread out, Norman trying to strengthen all doubtful points, but in a desperate desultory manner, that only confused him more and more, till he was obliged to lay his head down on the table, shut his eyes, and run his fingers through his hair, before he could recollect the simplest matter; his renderings alternated with groans, and, cold as was the room, his cheeks and brow were flushed and burning.
The doctor checked all this, by saying, gravely and sternly, 'This is not right, Norman. Where are all your resolutions?'
'I shall never do it. I ought never to have thought of it! I shall never succeed!'
'What if you do not?' said Dr. May, laying his hand on his shoulder.
'What? why, Tom's chance lost--you will all be mortified,' said Norman, hesitating in some confusion.
'I will take care of Tom,' said Dr. May.
