One Foot in the Grave

of the night. At least once. Maybe then you won’t be so sad all the time.”

She’d hit a nerve. Even though I’d never mentioned specifics about Bones, especially the one about him being a vampire, she knew I’d loved someone and then lost him. And she knew how alone I felt, more than I’d ever admit to.

I sighed. “I don’t think it’s a good idea-”

“I do,” she cut me off at once. “You’re not dead, so you need to stop acting like you are. It’s just dinner, not eloping to Vegas. No one says you even have to see Noah again. But just go out this once. Come on.”

I looked at my new kitty. He blinked, which I took as a yes as well.

“All right. Noah’s due here in five minutes. I’ll go, but I’ll probably say something completely inappropriate and be home in an hour.”

Denise laughed. “It doesn’t matter; at least you’d have given it a shot. Call me when you get in.”

I said goodbye and hung up. Apparently I was going on a date. Ready or not.

As I passed by a mirror, I did a double take at my reflection. My newly brown hair was cut shoulder-length and looked foreign, but that was the idea, in case Ian decided to confirm the rumors about my appearance. I didn’t need any vampires or ghouls getting a heads-up as to who I was because of my hair color. Blondes might have more fun, but I was hoping for a higher body count. The Red Reaper had been laid to rest. Long live the Brunette Reaper!

When Noah knocked on the door, I was as prepared as I was going to be. His smile froze when he saw me.

“You were a redhead before, right? I didn’t just imagine it in my anxiety?”

I raised a brow, no longer red but honey-colored. “I wanted a change. Been a redhead all my life, and I felt like something different.”

He backpedaled at once. “Well, it’s beautiful. You’re beautiful. I mean, you were beautiful before and you still are now. Let’s go, before you change your mind.”

I already had, but that had nothing to do with Noah. Still, much as I hated to admit it, Denise was right. I could spend another night tormenting myself over someone I could never have, or I could go out and try to have a nice evening for a change.

“Bad news,” I told him. “My friend, um, got held up and she couldn’t make it. Sorry. If you want to cancel I’ll completely understand.”

“No,” Noah said at once, smiling. “I’m hungry. Let’s eat.”

It’s just one date, I reminded myself as I walked to his car. What harm could there be?

Noah and I went to Renardo’s, an Italian bistro. Out of courtesy I drank only red wine, not wanting to reveal my penchant for vast quantities of gin and tonic.

“What do you do for a living, Cristine?” he asked.

“Field research and recruitment for the Bureau.”

It was sorta true, if you called hunting down and killing creatures of the night research. Or defined going across the country rounding up the best men the military, law enforcement, FBI, or even the criminal justice system had to offer as recruitment. Hey, far be it for an operation that killed the undead to discriminate in who we hired, right? Some of our best team members had once worn an orange jersey. Juan was a penal code graduate who chose working for Don over twenty years behind bars. The mishmash might not make for the most traditionally behaved fighting unit, but it sure was a deadly one.

Noah’s eyes widened. “The Bureau? You’re an FBI agent?”

“Not technically. Our department is more of an extension of Homeland Security.”

“Oh, so you have one of those jobs where you could tell me what you did, but then you’d have to kill me?” he teased.

I almost choked on my wine. You said it, buddy. “Uh, nothing that exciting. Just recruitment and research. I’m on call constantly, though, and I work strange hours. That’s why Denise would be a better person to introduce you around Richmond than me.”

This I said directly to put out any illusions. Noah was sweet, but anything more wouldn’t happen.

“I understand strange hours and being on call. I get paged at any hour for an emergency. Nothing as serious as your line of work, but still. Even the littlest things in life deserve attention. I’ve always felt how you treated something weaker than you showed your true character.”

Well, well. He had just raised a notch in my opinion.

“Sorry Denise couldn’t make it,” I said for probably the fifth time. “I think you’d really like her.”

Noah leaned forward. “I’m sure I would, but I’m not sorry she couldn’t make it. I only used meeting people as an excuse to ask you out. I really just wanted to go on a date with you. It must have been those fuzzy slippers.”

I laughed, which startled me. Truthfully, I’d expected to have a miserable time, but this was…nice.

“I’ll bear that in mind.”

I studied him over my wineglass. Noah wore a crewneck gray shirt and a sports coat, with charcoal slacks. His black hair was freshly cut, but that one lock kept falling over his forehead. Noah certainly had no reason to lack for dates. Even if his skin didn’t have that creamy crystal luminescence that glittered in the moonlight…

I shook my head. Dammit, I had to stop haunting myself with Bones! There was no hope for the two of us. Even if we did manage to conquer the insurmountable obstacles of my job killing the undead, or my mother’s seething hatred of anything with fangs, we still wouldn’t work. Bones was a vampire. He’d stay forever young while I’d inevitably grow old and die. The only way around my mortality was if I changed over, and I refused to do that. No matter how it broke my heart, I’d made the only decision I could by leaving him. Hell, Bones might not even think about me anymore. He’d probably moved on; it had been over four years since we’d seen each other. Maybe it was time for me to move on, too.

“Do you want to skip dessert and go for a walk?” I impulsively asked.

Noah didn’t hesitate. “I’d love to.”

We drove forty minutes to get to the beach. Being March, it was still frigid, and I wrapped my coat around me in the cold ocean breeze. Noah walked closely next to me, his hands inside his pockets.

“I love the ocean. It’s why I moved from Pittsburgh to Virginia. Ever since I first saw it, I knew I wanted to live near it. There’s something about it that makes me feel small, but like I’m still part of the bigger picture. That sounds cheesy, but it’s true.”

Wistfully I smiled. “It’s not cheesy. I feel the same way about the mountains. I still go back there, whenever I get a chance…”

My voice trailed off, because I was remembering who I’d been with when I first saw the mountains. This had to stop.

In a burst of longing to forget, I grabbed Noah and almost yanked his head down to mine. He hesitated a fraction before responding, wrapping his arms around me, his pulse tripling as I kissed him.

Just as suddenly as I began, I pulled away. “I’m sorry. That was rude of me.”

A shaky chuckle escaped him. “That kind of rudeness I’d been hoping for. In fact, I was planning a smooth maneuver with asking you to sit, maybe putting my arm around you…but I like your way better.”

God, his lip was bleeding. Stupid me forgot to check my strength. Poor Noah was apparently a glutton for abuse. At least I didn’t knock his teeth down his throat; he might have objected more strongly to that.

Noah grasped my shoulders, and this time he lowered his head under his own power. I restrained my normal force, kissing him gently and letting his tongue dip past my lips. His heart rate shot up higher and his blood traveled south. It was almost funny to hear his body’s reaction.

I pushed Noah back. “That’s all I’m willing to give.”

“I’m very happy with that, Cristine. The only other thing I want is to see you again. I really want to see you again.”

His face was earnest and so honest. Completely unlike mine with all my secrets.

I sighed again. “Noah, I lead a very…odd life. My job has me traveling frequently, leaving without notice, and having to cancel almost every plan I make. Does that sound like something you want to get involved in?”