a failure with one and a catastrophe to the other. I am the cause that bring hope or comtort to the damned. I cannot tee! compassion for those over whom I imagine myself to be set as a judge.
I cannot even take this girl in my arms. And that not because of duty or for her sake at all, but just because of my own conception of myself as spotless: my quaint idea of myself as good, which seems to go on being with me, however rottenly I may behave.
'Get up, Judy,' said Ducane in a gentle voice, turning away from the bed. 'Get up, child. Put your clothes on. Time to go home.' He looked about the room. A white feathery heap lay beside one of the chairs. Judy's summer dress, patterned with green and blue flowers, hung over the back of the chair. Ducane picked up the pile of soft slithery perfumed underwear and hurled it on to the bed. Judy turned over and groaned.
'I'm going into the bathroom,' said Ducane. 'Get dressed: He went into the bathroom and locked the door. He used the lavatory. He sleeked back the thick locks of his dark hair and looked closely at his face in the mirror. His face was brown, shiny, oily. His eyes seemed to bulge and stare. He put out his tongue, large and spade-like. He could hear movements in the bedroom. There was a soft tap upon the door.
'I'm ready now,' said Judy. She was dressed. The wisp of blue and green dress fitted her closely, sleekly. Her breasts, thought Ducane, oh her breasts. I might have touched them just for a moment. And he thought, how pretty she is with her clothes on.
It was as if he had made love to her and now felt a calmer and more tender renewal of passion at seeing his mistress clothed.
He moved quickly past her and opened the bedroom door.
There was a quick flurry on the landing and Fivey retreated as far as the head of the stairs, hesitated, and then turned to face Ducane in the half light. Fivey, dressed in black trousers and a white shirt, looked like the leader of some Balkan revolution.
He stood, a little self-consciously defiant, his huge head thrown back, his fingers slowly exploring one of his moustaches.
Ducane said, almost shouting now, 'Fivey, how absolutely splendid, I'm so glad to see you're still up. You can get out the car and take this young lady home.'
'Oh, but – ' said Judy, shrinking back again into the room.
'Come on, out you go,' said Ducane. Without touching her he walked round behind her and half ushered half shooed her out through the open door. He turned on the lights on the landing.
'Good night,' said Ducane. 'My man will drive you home. Go along, Fivey, go and get the car. Mrs McGrath will wait for you at the front door.'
'Very good, Sir,' said Fivey. With an air of nobility he descended the stairs.
'Go on down,' said Ducane to Judy. 'I won't come with you.
Wait for Fivey at the door. He won't be a moment, Good night.'
'You're not cross with me? You'll see me again? Please? T 'Good night, my child, good night,' said Ducane gesturing towards the stairs.
She passed him slowly and went on down. A minute later he heard the sound of the car and the closing of the front door.
Ducane went back into his bedroom and shut the door and locked it. He stood for a moment blankly. Then he lowered himself carefully on to the floor and lay there face downwards with his eyes closed.
Thirty
'Isn't it funny to think that the cuckoo is silent in Africa?' said Edward.
Henrietta, have you taken that toad out of the bath?' said Mary.
'I wanted to tame him,' said Henrietta. 'People can tame toads.'
'Have you taken him out of the bath?'
'Yes, he's back in the garden.'
'Cuckoos can't perch on the ground,' said Edward. 'They have two claws pointing forward and two pointing backward; They just sit on the ground. I saw one yesterday, just after we saw the saucer '
'Do bustle along, Edward. If you value More Hunting Wasps so highly, why do you cover it with marmalade?'
'Listen, he's changing his tune,' said Edward. 'Cuckoo in June changes his tune. Listen.'
A distant hollow cu-cuckoo cu-cuckoo came through the open window of the kitchen.
'I wish it would rain,' said Henrietta.
'Off you go, twins,' said Mary, 'and take Mingo with you.
He's getting under my feet.'
The twins went off in procession, Henrietta pushing her brother and Mingo following with a slow wag of his floppy tail for anyone who might be attending to him. Montrose, once more in curled luxurious possession of the basket, watched his departure and drowsed back to sleep. The cat was not an early riser.
'I expect we're getting under your feet too, darling,' said Kate. 'Come on, John, we'll go into the garden, shall we? What a heavenly morning. Gosh, it's good to be back!'
Kate picked up her Spanish basket and led the way across the untidy hall and out on to the lawn at the front of the house.
The warm morning air enfolded them, thick and exotic after the cool of the house, full already of smells and textures which the hot sun, who had been shining for many hours although by human time it was still early morning, had elicited from the leafy slopes and the quiet offered surface of the sea.
'Did you hear the old cuckoo this morning at about four o'clock?' said Kate. 'I do hope he didn't wake you.'
'I was awake anyway.'
'We've had the longest day, haven't we? But midsummer just seems to go on and on.'
