Like last time. And look how that had turned out.
I closed my eyes on a vision of blood and tried, uselessly, to sleep.
I woke up, not remembering drifting off, to find myself on my right side, staring into David's face. He was watching me. I yawned, stretched, and inventoried the need for a good toothbrushing, not to mention mouthwashing-more things I hadn't needed to deal with when Djinn. Those halcyon days were making resuming normal life one giant pain in the ass.
'Sleep well?' David asked.
I hadn't, and he knew it. 'Where'd you go?… No, I take it back, I don't really want to know.
'We were going to fight.' He lifted a hand and traced a fingertip up the outside of my arm to my shoulder. 'I didn't see any reason it had to happen. You were just tired and discouraged.'
'Fighting can lead to other things.' It had before. Our first real lovemaking had happened as the result of a fight in a hotel. I saw the memory move in him, too.
'No need to fight to have that.' His voice had dropped an octave, gone even quieter, but there was a tension behind it that made him seem even more alive, even more intense. The light glide of his touch on me took a left turn, followed the line of my collarbone.
'Close the curtains,' I whispered. Behind him, the curtains snapped shut, all on their own, blocking out the frowning clouds and the steady, mournful pulse of rain. It occurred to me, late and with an electric jolt to the spine, that David was under the covers with me, and he'd already done away with the bother of clothes. His glasses lay carefully folded on the nightstand, next to the fragile blue glitter of his bottle.
Nothing between us but skin, mine real-whatever that meant-and his manifested by will and magic. And all the more real for that, because he'd chosen this. Chosen
I felt cold. As if he knew it, he put his arms around me and pulled me close to his heat. His lips pressed a burning kiss on my forehead, a benediction I didn't deserve, and slowly traveled down to my mouth. Sweet, slow, leisurely kisses, gentle as the rain outside. Healing the chill inside me, filling the empty places.
He murmured something into my open mouth- words I didn't know, in a language like liquid fire. I pulled away a little, looking into his eyes. So much passion in him, constrained by so much will.
'What did that mean?' I asked him. He traced the line of my lips with his fingertips like a blind man memorizing the shape of my face, and didn't answer. 'David, what did that mean?'
I felt him go tense against me. The lazy focus of his eyes sharpened. 'Don't,' he warned me.
'What did that mean?' I was being very specifically repetitive, and I felt the surge of power as the Rule of Three kicked in. He was compelled to answer me truthfully, but of course, the truth with Djinn could be fluid. It wouldn't be outside the boundaries for him to reply to me in another language. We could play this game all day, if he felt inclined. Owning his bottle didn't mean I owned his soul.
But he didn't try to avoid it. His eyes went the color of dark, tarnished brass, almost human, and his hand went still against my cheek.
'It's part of a ritual,' he said. 'The literal translation is that I will mourn you when you're gone. Because you're mortal, and you take stupid risks, and I'm going to lose you. I hate it, but I know it's going to happen. Because you won't be sensible.'
There wasn't a breath between us. Skin on skin, sealed together with sweat as body heat rose. My whole body was aching and throbbing for him, but my mind kept struggling.
'What kind of ritual?'
'Joanne-'
'What kind of ritual?' No answer.
This time, the words were in that liquid-fire language again. The language of the Djinn, but with a rough edge to them that sounded human. He pulled me to him again, put those burning lips to the column of my throat, and made me arch uncontrollably against him. It wasn't exactly clear in this relationship who owned who, I thought when I was capable of thinking. And he wasn't going to answer me. Not in words.
His hands were everywhere on me, shivering my skin into goose bumps, making me moan with need and delight.
'God, David, please…' I whispered. I wasn't sure what I was asking, whether it was for the white-hot surge of flesh between us or the answers to my questions. Or something else entirely. I felt like crying, and I didn't know why. My heart hammered like a cheap toy, fragile and unreliable, one beat at a time between me and the end of things. I hadn't faced the crashing, intimate knowledge of my own mortality, because I couldn't. I was always hiding from it in action, chasing after what came next.
Not David. He'd faced it. He'd been afraid of losing me, of having every moment between us threaten to be the last. I'd made a being of fire and power
He looked merciless staring down at me, except for the vulnerability in his eyes. The odd, unexpected humanity. 'Please don't ask me what it means.'
There was something in it that made my heart break. I whispered, 'I won't,' and felt the tension ease out of him. 'Because you're going to tell me.'
'You have to trust me.'
I choked on a laugh. 'Who's on top here?'
He let go of my wrists, sat up on his knees. The sheet slid away. The lamps gilded his skin, and I felt my breath catch and tear something inside of me. Some last shred of resistance.
His hands, hot on my thighs. Moving them.
'You have to trust me,' he repeated. It was only a whisper now, and his eyes had kindled a bright new flame. 'Can you do that?'
'Yes.'
'You're sure?'
'Yes!' I pushed myself up on straight arms, looking into his eyes. Slowly bent my knees and drew them up, drawing him in with the motion.
His teeth lightly grazed the skin of my shoulder. I put my arms around him, holding him, feeling the waves surge and break. Waves of power, transforming and pure.
He whispered words against me that broke me apart, destroyed me, rebuilt me as we moved, and I didn't recognize a word of it, and it no longer mattered, because now I
He was telling me he loved me, the way Djinn say the words, and it was more beautiful and more terrifying than the banners of war.
I fell asleep in his arms, safe and warm and untroubled, and there were no dreams.
I woke up to thunder. Reflex action: I checked Oversight, and found nothing out of the ordinary out there, then realized that the thunder was knocking, and there were people outside of my hotel room.
'Jo!' A man's voice, rough and authoritative. 'Open the damn door. Right now!'
I knew the voice. I let my head fall back against the pillow of David's warm skin, and said what he already knew. 'Great. The boss is checking up on us.'
David pulled away from me and I could feel the fury burning through him, see it boiling in his eyes. This could get
'Go,' I told him. 'Let me handle it.'
His hot eyes scorched me, just for a second, but behind the anger I saw worry for me. I kissed him, fast and hard, and felt him mist away.
The door slammed open. I yelped and crawled backward, clutching the covers over myself, until my naked back met the cold headboard.
My boss, Paul Giancarlo, flanked by three other Wardens. One of them was Marion Bearheart, the woman who scared me most in the world; nice lady, frightening powers, and the right and responsibility to use them.
I flipped up into the aetheric plane to get a quick reading, and saw Paul in his avatar form-his outline had the