when she turned to him with a fierce expression. “I admire what you’re trying to do. I really do. I understand the need to protect and support your family, but you’re going to have to get over it. You know that, don’t you?”
“What?”
“They’ve got to learn how to take care of themselves. The temple needs to be self-sufficient. Your brother and sister have to find their own way. If you pour everything you have into supporting them, then you’ll have nothing left for you. You’ll end up resenting them and frankly, you’re not doing them any favors. It’s good for kids to struggle a bit.”
He stared at her a moment, stunned by her audacity. No Chinese person would ever dare say such a thing to him. But then, Tracy wasn’t Chinese. “You know nothing of my family or my life in Hong Kong,” he said stiffly.
She shrugged. “Maybe not. But I know kids have to be pushed out of the nest eventually. Even you.”
“I am my family’s nest!” he snapped, startled by his sudden fierce anger. “Without me—”
“They’re without you right now, Nathan. How are they doing?”
He swallowed. Awful, truth be told. He had received another couple of e-mails, one from each of his siblings. Their mother was shopping again with money they didn’t have.
“Nathan? How are they doing without you?” Tracy pressed.
He sighed. “Go to the temple and find out for yourself.”
“Ha!” she crowed. “They’re doing fine, aren’t they? They’re working or going to school and so your big martyr routine is nothing of the sort.” She planted her hands on her hips, her eyes piercing even in the darkness. “So why all the way to the United States? Did you really get kicked out of the temple? Did you really fall in love?”
“Yes and yes.” He could see that she didn’t believe him. She had grown up with a loving family. She didn’t understand the emptiness of having people around, but no love. “Why do you push at me, Tracy? You have everything—a brother who adores you, a future as a great tigress. Ask me about life in the temple, ask me about what happens between partners. Those questions I can answer. They are your path, and you should want to know more about it.”
She started walking around more cars, cutting through a lane to get to the right aisle. He followed as fast as he could, but she was angry and moving very fast. “I’ll ask what questions I want, thank you very much.” She stopped abruptly beside a huge SUV and spun back to him. “What’s it going to take to convince you that I’m not a tigress? That I’m not going to your temple, that I won’t leap down whatever mystic path you think is so inevitable for me?” She straightened to her full height. “I choose my own path, Nathan. We all do. And I do not choose to be a tigress.”
He looked at her, hope surging within him despite what logic and reason proclaimed. Was it possible? Could she choose to be an amazing woman, not an amazing goddess? He wanted to believe, but his experience told him differently. “A few minutes ago, did you notice the man in the running pants as he wiped sweat from his brow? Did you see his chest muscles beneath his muscle T-shirt? And what about his legs? Were you watching the way his pants hugged tight to his bottom?”
Her jaw clenched but she ground out the words. “I saw, I noticed, but I don’t have to act on it.”
Nathan sighed. “Not today. But you will. Without training, you will act. You belong at the temple, Tracy. It’s where tigresses go.”
She glared at him; she tried to stare him down, but it didn’t work. Everything in him said she was a tigress and not someone who would ever form a lasting attachment with a man. Never. And so in the end, she curled her hands into fists and shook them impotently at her sides. “You are such a stubborn, arrogant prick! You think you know everything, and you don’t. You just don’t!” And with that she spun around and stomped away.
He was busy watching her shove her fists into her pockets, and she was busy controlling her fury. Neither of them noticed the pothole in the pavement until she had stepped in it, rolling her ankle out from under herself. He saw her hips shift as she lost her balance. With her hands deep in her pockets she couldn’t catch herself, so she fell hard against the corner of her own truck. He saw it happen, was already diving forward to catch her, but he was too late.
The side of her head caught the corner edge of her truck, knocking her in a different direction as she tumbled to the ground. While he was still a step away, she hit the pavement. Her elbow connected first, then she rolled onto her back, then her other side. He saw blood and hair whip past, but mostly he saw her face contorting in surprise and pain. Her teeth were bared and her jaw clenched. She didn’t even cry out.
And then he caught her. Her roll was nearly at an end anyway, but he still tried to cushion her body against his. “Tracy!”
She growled, deep in her throat. Oddly enough, the sound reassured him. She was still conscious.
“Take it easy,” he said. “You hit your head.” Nathan kept one hand braced on her shoulder while the other gently probed into the hair above her forehead. He felt the slick welling of blood as she flinched away.
“Ow! Stop that!” She shoved him away. “I know what happened.” She rolled smoothly into a seated position, then gingerly burrowed her fingers into her hair. The blood was already dripping down her cheek. “Perfect,” she groused. “Just perfect.”
“We should get you to a hospital.”
“Do you know what the E.R. costs?” She flinched as she looked at the blood on her hand. “It’s not that deep. Head wounds always bleed a lot.” She grimaced then wiped the blood off on her shirt before returning to probe her wound. “It’s shallow and long.”
“A hospital could stitch it up,” he said gently.
“Why? To prevent a scar underneath my hair? It hurts but it’s just a cut.” The blood still ran in long streaks down her cheek. It looked awful, but she was right. What he had felt told him the cut was not serious.
“Very well,” he acquiesced. “Give me the keys. I will take you home.”
He helped her stand, feeling the strength in her body despite the blood. As they made it to their feet, she pulled out her keys but wouldn’t give them to him. “What side of the road do they drive on in Hong Kong?” she asked.
He grimaced. “The left.”
“Then I’m driving.” She shook her head when he began to protest. “I can handle a scar under my hairline. A busted truck is something entirely different.”
“But—” he began.
“Get in the car, Nathan. I’m taking you home.”
He pressed his lips together feeling acutely useless. This entire evening had been a huge blow to his masculinity. He hadn’t been able to pay for anything; he hadn’t caught her when she’d fallen, he couldn’t even drive her home. “At least drive to your home. I can walk from there.”
She wadded up the end of her shirt, pulling it high to wipe the blood off her forehead. It smeared across her face in an ugly mess, but no new blood dripped down. They both waited, keeping the dome light on as they watched. After a couple minutes, she gently touched her hairline. “See,” she said, “it’s already stopped.”
He pulled her hand away and gently blew her hair aside. “Yeah, it looks like it’s slowing down.”
With a nod of satisfaction, she started the engine. As she drove, he watched closely for signs of distress and found nothing. Not even his sister would handle a blow to the head with nonchalance, but Tracy didn’t seem fazed.
“Quit staring. I’m fine,” she said.
“I know,” he answered. “I’m just…”
“Surprised? Don’t be. A lack of health insurance makes one a lot more casual about injuries.”
“But—”
“Leave it, Nathan. I’m fine.”
He nodded, still thrown by his uselessness and her competence. She truly was an amazing woman.
She pulled into the parking lot of his apartment building and killed the engine. “Look, I know I’m in for a rough patch, trying to control my inner tigress or whatever. But I’m willing to work at it. I’ll meditate, I’ll read whatever stuff you want me to, but you need to understand that I am in control of my destiny. I already have a plan for my life and it doesn’t include a temple in Hong Kong.”
He nodded slowly, stunned to admit that it was possible. If anyone could deny the call of the tigress, it would be Tracy. She had that much strength of will. With the right training, it was possible. She could choose her path rather than let her inner passions drive her destiny.
“Okay,” he finally said. “You win. I will give you what guidance I can.”
