things up so quickly is beyond me. She only had a few months, but…”
“Big debt?”
“Big ignorance. She simply doesn’t want to understand anything mortal. Her whole focus is the divine, and as such, it is our duty to support her in her quest.”
“You mean your duty.” She wrapped her hands around her knees.
He was silent for a long moment, but then she heard him step closer. “It is my duty as—”
“Yeah, yeah, oldest male. Embrace the responsibility. I understand that Nathan, I really do. I just feel bad because it obviously wears on you.”
Tracy felt the mattress dip and smiled. He was going to stay for a bit. She’d set a candle on the bedside table and now lit it with unsteady hands. A warm glow filled the chamber, and she was able to finally see him sitting in his wrinkled suit. The light was gentle enough to emphasize his beauty, but she also saw the weariness in his face and the droop in his shoulders.
“You’re tired,” she said. “Did you get anything to eat?”
He nodded. “My sister left food for me. But what of your day? Temple accounting cannot be nearly as interesting as your first full day as a tigress.”
“Doubtful.” Today had been a day for Stephen to show off his many accomplishments. Under the guise of “orienting her to Hong Kong,” she had wandered the finest boutiques where he had bought her silk robes and sexy lingerie. She had dined in a floating restaurant and then had high tea at the Mandarin hotel. Nathan knew, of course. One of the first things she’d discovered was that she was big news in this little community of women. “You didn’t tell me Stephen was that rich. I mean, wealthy, yes, but über-rich? Top-twenty-in-the-world rich?”
His gaze slanted down to the silk coverlet. “Money is nothing to him. He can put you and your brother through college and think nothing of it. He could set you up with diamonds, cars, a villa of your own. Whatever you want, Stephen can give it all to you.”
“I don’t want material things.” She saw him arch a brow at her, and she had the grace to blush. “Okay, okay, so I like the money. I’m human. And frankly, nobody is more surprised than me. But all I want is a financial cushion. I don’t need a whole pillow factory.”
He frowned at her, and she knew she wasn’t making any sense.
“I want enough wealth to live comfortably. I don’t need über-wealth.”
“And heaven?” he pressed.
And right there was the problem. Every moment she was with Stephen—no matter what he did or what he said—there was something elemental in her attraction to him. His energies, her energies—they yearned toward one another. It didn’t help that deep down, she kinda liked the guy. He was unfailingly suave. And who wouldn’t love being wined and dined by a gazillionaire?
“There’s nothing between us,” she said as much to herself as to Nathan. “Chemistry, yes. But a connection? No.”
“That makes it easier to launch to heaven, Tracy. Earthly attachments—”
“I know.” She’d already heard it from everyone. One couldn’t focus on the divine when your mind—or your heart—was on your partner. “Nathan—”
“It will get easier, Tracy. Give it time.” Was there a flash of regret in his eyes? She couldn’t tell in the dim candlelight. And worse, he was already standing up to leave.
“Don’t go, Nathan. Stay and talk to me. Tell me about the sale of the temple.”
He paused, his eyes warming into friendship. “What have you heard?”
“Nothing. Honest.” She shifted, crossing her legs as she faced him. “So what do you think Mr. I’m-so-rich-I- can’t-think-of-enough-ways-to-spend-it is going to do with the temple?”
“Keep it exactly the same or so it says in the contract,” answered Nathan softly. “I had hoped that Mama would take on some responsibility after I left. That she would see…”
“I doubt finances are your mother’s forte,” Tracy said drily. The Tigress Mother seemed to float through her days and nights, seeing only what she wanted to see, then ignoring all the rest for others to handle. Others like Nathan and his siblings.
“No,” he said with clear regret. “Managing money has never interested her.”
“So what are you going to do?”
He sighed. “Alienate my mother forever.” He reached out and gripped her hand, his warmth enveloping her. “The money will be evenly divided. We all will have plenty to live on assuming it is spent wisely.”
And there, of course, was the problem. “Will your mother spend wisely?”
He grimaced. “She will have to. She has destroyed her credit rating. So now, her monthly allowance will be given on a debit card. As long as she remains at the temple, her daily needs will be cared for. That, too, is part of the contract.”
Tracy smiled. “You’ve done well, you know. You’ve seen to everything and everyone fairly.” Then she sighed, guessing at the future. “She’s going to hate you for this, isn’t she?”
He shrugged. “That, too, sometimes is the lot of the eldest son.” He spoke casually, but she knew this wasn’t easy for him. She squeezed his hand and saw his expression tighten on his face. It was so intense, she felt as if he were actually touching her cheek, stroking her lips. Her belly tightened; her breath quickened. She had already consumed the yin-dampening tea, done her nightly meditation on not being horny. She’d done all the things she needed to so that she would not jump the nearest man.
But the nearest man was Nathan. And at the moment, she wanted nothing more than to touch him, to give comfort, to…She swallowed, realizing the truth in that moment. She wanted to give him the love he had been denied throughout his childhood. But the moment she leaned for him, he leaped out of bed, breaking the connection of their hands.
“You’re tired, Tracy. And I shouldn’t even be in this part of the temple.”
“I’m not tired!” she cried. “And you’re here. Please, Nathan, don’t go.”
She should have saved her breath. He shook his head and crossed quickly to the door. “You’re a tigress now, Tracy. You cannot see what is possible with me blocking the view,” he whispered. Then he ducked into the hallway.
“Nathan, wait!” She was already dragging on a robe. Then she grabbed the candle and rushed to her door. But by the time she got there, the only living thing in the hall was another temple cat.
Chapter 18
HE SHOULD LET HER SLEEP. Nathan knew that Tracy had begun classes today. Few people understood the rigorous physical demands put on a tigress. Eternal youth and beauty had to be nurtured every day, and she would be sore and exhausted from her physical studies. He should let her sleep…but he couldn’t leave without saying goodbye.
He slipped into her room, inhaling deeply. Her scent filled his mind as it had filled his thoughts from the moment he’d first met her. It was clearer here than in Illinois. Here, she had no access to her perfumes; the air was not purified and circulated as in the United States, and most of all, his mother would have demanded that she throw out any lotions or deodorant.
So now when he saw her lying so sweet in her bed, he could inhale deeply and know that a tigress rested here. That a woman of extraordinary beauty and skill tempted men from this boudoir, and that he was privileged to enter. He smiled as he stepped to her bedside. He had already known that. He had seen her incredible potential long before his mother had begun feeding her purifying teas and food laced with aphrodisiacs.
He set his candle on her bedside table, right next to the one she kept there in case he visited. She lay twisted in the sheets, her body completely naked. He could see the lush mound of one breast, the rounded curve of her hip and the silky bronze coil of her hair about the pillow.
His belly tightened and his organ stretched for her, but he held back. She was not his. Now that she was learning what was possible, he would not remain long at her side. Her destiny was as a tigress. His was…not here. He would be better served to cut ties now. He extended his hand, needing to feel the dewy softness of her cheek, to touch the wet fullness of her lips. How he longed…
