He saw the red staining Willow’s cheeks and the laughter lurking in her beautiful hazel eyes. His heart ached at the thought of hurting her in any way at all. Gently, he kissed her lips and wished that she were anyone except Reno’s sister — even a fancy lady who had known many men.
But Willow had been a virgin, and she would always be Reno’s sister.
No point moaning over spilled milk, Caleb told himself grimly. What’s done is done and I wouldn’t undo it even if I could. I’ll die remembering what it was like to take Willow, to hear her sweet cries, to feel her release tugging at me. A virgin, and she burned me alive.
Maybe I’ll get lucky. Maybe that son of a bitch will be killed by Indians or break his neck looking for gold. Maybe he’ll be dead before I find him.
The thought was like a balm spreading through Caleb. But life hadn’t taught him to believe in the easiest solution to any problem. It had taught him to do what had to be done, because too many people just looked away and left the dirty work for other people to take care of.
People like Caleb Black, who knew that the simple justice of an eye for an eye was never simple and rarely just, but the alternative was a West where the weak went unprotected andunavenged, a West where men without conscience preyed upon those least able to defend themselves.
If Reno isn’t dead before I get to him, he soon will be. Or I will be. Or both.
Caleb gathered Willow close and held her, simply held her, for his thoughts were tearing at him.
«What’s wrong?» she asked. «Didn’t you enjoy what we did?»
He smiled sadly and buried his face in lavender-scented hair. «If I’d enjoyed it any more, I’d have died.»
Willow laughed, but there was a catch in her voice. «Yes, it was like that, wasn’t it? Dying, but not quite. Being reborn, but not the same.» Her arms tightened around Caleb. «I’ll never be the same again. You’re part of me now.»
«Remember that,» he said, holding her hard, his voice rough. «Remember that when you look at me and see the man who took your innocence. I should have controlled myself. I didn’t. I couldn’t. I’ve never been like that with a woman. I’m sorry, Willow.»
«I’m not. I love you.»
Willow held her breath, wanting to hear him say he loved her. All that came was the steamy whispering of the water around their joined bodies as Caleb turned his head and claimed her mouth in a kiss that was both tender and so intense that it left Willow shaken.
«Someday you’ll remember having said that, and you’ll wish you had held your tongue,» Caleb said quietly. «But I’m glad to hear it. I’m glad to know I pleased you.»
Fear squeezed Willow’s heart, draining some of the radiance from her. «Caleb, what’s wrong? I don’t understand.»
«I know.» He took a deep breath and tried to tell Willow about his dead sister and the man who had seduced her, but Caleb could no more force himself to speak and destroy the light in Willow’s eyes than he had been able to prevent himself from taking the gift of her untouched body. «After we find your brother, you’ll understand.»
The questions Willow would have asked were scattered by Caleb’s kiss. She didn’t understand the yearning in him, or the darkness. She didn’t understand the unhappiness she sensed in him when she spoke of love, yet she knew all of those things existed as surely as did the stirring of his body within hers once more.
What Willow did understand was that she wanted to bring Caleb ease and laughter, to be the sunrise banishing darkness from his life.
Reluctantly, Caleb ended the kiss. «If you don’t get off my lap,» he said, biting Willow’s lips just a bit fiercely, «my good intentions will go to Hell in a handcart.»
«What good intentions?»
«I’m trying not to seduce you again.»
«Ever?» Willow asked, unable to conceal her dismay.
Caleb closed his eyes and silently conceded that it would be better if he never pressed into Willow’s soft body again, sinking into her, losing himself in the baffling, overwhelming currents of passion that flowed between the two of them. But the thought of never taking her again was unbearable. He had never known anyone like Willow. She satisfied him as no other woman ever had, teaching him how hungry he had been before he had found her.
And he had just begun to plumb the depths of the passion in her.
«I’m trying not to seduce you right now,» Caleb said, his voice thick.
«Why?»
«It’s too soon for you. I don’t want to hurt you.»
Willow smiled slightly. «You aren’t hurting me.»
«I’m not moving in you, either. But I will be real quick if you don’t get up.»
Caleb put his hands around Willow’s waist and began lifting her from his lap. The feel of her gliding over his hardening flesh took his breath away. He heard her stifled gasp and his hands tightened, testing the sleek resilience of her waist. The gasp became a throaty sound of pleasure.
«Stop it,» Caleb said, bending until he could bite the smooth skin of Willow’s shoulder.
«Stop what?» she murmured as she threaded her fingers through his hair.
«Making me want to stay in this pool and take you until I’m so weak I drown.»
«Weak?» Slender hands kneaded Caleb’s shoulders and the thick muscles of his biceps. «You feel about as weak as a mountain.»
«Didn’t you know? Being with a woman weakens a man.»
Willow laughed and moved her hips, frankly measuring him. «Do tell. When?»
His breath came in hard.
«When does it weaken you?» she repeated as she moved her hips again.
Caleb’s slow smile made Willow shiver with anticipation.
«You’ll be the first to know,» he promised. Then he set his teeth and lifted her free of his aroused flesh, biting back a groan as he did so. «After you, the water feels cold.»
When Willow understood the meaning of his words, she took a quick, broken breath. «And I feel empty. Is it — is it natural to want you like that, to want to stay that way forever?»
Caleb’s tawny eyes changed as the heat of his body redoubled, set afire by the knowledge that Willow truly enjoyed having him inside her.
«How did you stay innocent so long?» he asked.
«I didn’t feel this way with other men. Only you,» Willow said simply. «Even my fiance. When Steven held my hand or kissed my cheek, it was nice, but it didn’t make my heart run away and my chest so tight I couldn’t breathe.»
«Your fiance?» Caleb said harshly. «Are you engaged?»
«He died three years ago.»
Visibly, Caleb relaxed. «The war?»
Willow nodded.
«Do you still love him?»
«No. I know now that I never loved him. Not really. Not the way I love —»
Caleb’s quick, fierce kiss shut off Willow’s words. «Out of the water, woman. My good intentions are shrinking by the second.»
«Shrinking? I would have said the opposite,» she muttered beneath her breath.
There was a crack of surprised laughter from Caleb, followed by a single word. «Out!»
He emphasized his command by putting his hand on Willow’s smooth bottom and giving her a boost. Just as his palm fell away, his touch changed to a caress that traced the shadowed curve between her hips.
Breathlessly, Willow scrambled out of the warm water and picked up the cotton blanket she had left on the rocks. She turned around just as Caleb emerged from the pool. Silver rivulets poured from his body, highlighting every texture of his masculinity. The blunt thrust of his arousal was startling.
«Too late to run now,» Caleb said dryly, watching Willow’s eyes widen as she measured him. «We fitted together like a hand in a velvet glove and you loved every bit of it.»
