me.'
Adeline Warner and Addie Peck were one and the same. One woman, two different lifetimes. She'd been born twice, once in I860 and once in I9I0… both lives were combined in her, and she remembered parts of each.
Terrified, Addie pushed herself away from the corral and began to run. It didn't matter that there was nowhere to run to. She had to find a place to hide, long enough to be away from everyone and think. She couldn't go back into the house. She couldn't face anyone.
'Addie?'
The soft inquiry stopped her in her tracks. She looked at the bunkhouse steps where Ben sat with a guitar resting across his knees, slender steel strings trailing from the neck of it. He set the guitar to the side and stood up, his eyes narrowed. 'Addie, what's wrong?' She couldn't move, just stared mutely as he walked over to her. 'What happened?'
'N-nothing-'
'Did Diaz say something to upset you?'
'No. Please don't touch me. Don't.' She quivered as his hands closed over her arms, his thumbs fitting in the hollows of her inner elbows. The touch of his hands was warm. He peered into her pale face and slid his arm around her shoulders, urging her toward the house.
'Come with me. I'll take you back.'
'No,' Addie said, trying to pull away from him.
'Okay… okay. Don't get all worked up. Come here.' He pulled her to one of the sheds next to the corral, hidden from view, and turned her to face him. The outline of his shoulders was crisp against the night sky. He was strong enough to do anything he wished, strong enough to kill. But his hands were gentle as they clasped her arms. She knew he could feel her trembling. 'We're going to talk, Addie.'
'I… I can't.'
'What did Diaz say to you? Just tell me. I'll take care of it. '
'No, don't talk to him,' she managed to say. 'Don't.'
'I will if you don't tell me what's wrong.'
She shook her head helplessly. 'Everything's wrong, especially me. Everything's wrong.' Unconsciously she gripped his forearms, her face tinted white in the early-evening light. 'Ben, I'm different than before, aren't I? Don't you see a difference? You said I'd changed since that afternoon. You said it yourself.'
A frown inserted itself between his slanting brows. 'You mean the afternoon when Cade and I couldn't find you in town?'
'Yes. I've been different since then. Like another woman.'
'Not that different.'
'Yes, I am,' she insisted, her nails digging into his forearms. Ben didn't seem to notice the pain of it as he stared down at her. 'You said even my face was different.”
'So I did,' he said lightly. 'Yes, I've noticed a few changes in you.' A teasing note entered his voice. 'Welcome ones.'
'I know things I didn't know before. And I can't ride as well as I used to. I'm not that Adeline Warner anymore.'
'Why is it so important to be different from the way you were before? I wouldn't disclaim everything about the old Adeline if I were you.' His cool, sensible manner made her feel a little better. She envied his control, his lack of fear. How wonderful it would be to look at the world as he did and believe that everything was rational and in perfect order. 'There were a few things about you I'd come to admire.'
'How am I
'There are thing about you I didn't notice before, I guess.' Ben paused and let go of her arms, bracing them on the wall behind her, forming a circle that enclosed her securely. 'You're softer, somehow. You have more compassion. And you have the sweetest smile I've… ' Their eyes met in the darkness, and Addie felt every bone in her body dissolve. Weakly she leaned back against the wall, her breath shortening. 'You've always seemed pretty callous for a woman,' Ben continued. 'On the outside as innocent as a baby, on the inside as hard-hearted and cash minded as any painted cat in Abilene-'
'What's a painted cat?' she whispered, and he laughed quietly.
'Ever hear of a bawdy house, honey?' The word 'honey' was a casual endearment that everyone used. But when Ben said it, it was an audible caress.
'Oh,' she said, her face coloring. 'How can you be so rude when-'
'We seem to have a problem understanding each other, Adeline. How did you manage to learn so many new words and forget so many old ones?'
'I… I don't know.'
'The way you look right now is different from before. As if you need someone to take care of you. You've leaned on Russ in the past, haven't you? He's solved your problems, shouldered your burdens. But for some reason, you haven't been leaning on him lately. Why not? Have you two had a falling-out? Is that the problem?'
'No. Don't ask questions, I'm tired of questions, and I don't need someone to take care of me-'
'Yes, you do. There's been a hungry look in your eyes for days. A look of needing a man. Isn't Jeff fulfilling his role as your nearly-betrothed?'
Flinching, she turned away and tried to leave, but he wouldn't let her. His hands rested on her shoulders, and the hint of strength in his grip promised to increase if she didn't hold still. The protective walls around her heart seemed to crumble. The more she tried to steel herself against him, the more helpless she was. There was a dreamlike stillness between them, as each tried to see into the mystery of the other.
'No, he isn't,' Ben said huskily, breaking the silence. 'And you're looking for something better. So you're beginning to see him for what he is, hmmn?'
'No, I'm not! I mean, yes, I know what he is, and I like him just fine!'
'You like him for his looks and his money, and of course, his amiable personality. And at the same time you despise him for being a weak fool. No woman can stand a man who'll let her control him.'
She glared at him, the line of her jaw showing through the delicate roundness of her cheek as she clenched her teeth. 'You're making me sound awful. I'm not like that. '
'I've had you figured from the first moment we met. Oh, there've been some revisions along the way, but I've still got you down right.'
'You couldn't begin to understand me,' she said, her voice locked high in her throat.
“You know what a mavericker is, Addie?'
“A cattle thief.'
'An entrepreneur. He doesn't let anyone stand between him and what he wants. I'm that way by nature, Addie, and so are you. And neither of us has respect for any folk who'll let us take advantage of them. I have a feeling it won't be long before Jeff's charms are going to pall, and you'll start looking for someone who won't let you manipulate him. Don't look so offended. You know it's the truth. '
'It is not,' she said swiftly. 'You don't know the first thing about me, or about what's between me and Jeff.'
His smile was taunting. 'Don't I?'
'No,' she said coolly. 'Jeff is more than man enough to take care of me. And I don't manipulate him!'
Ben grinned, noting that her paleness had been replaced by a healthy flush of indignation. 'Be honest. You lead him around by the nose. '
'I don't!'
He smiled mockingly. 'Such impressive loyalty to a man who doesn't know the first thing about you. I'd bet my last cent your conversations with him aren't worth a good cuss. But maybe it isn't his mind you're interested in. Possibly he provides a good roll in the grass. Admittedly his looks are passable, and then there's that mighty attractive ranch his father owns-'
'My relationship with Jeff is none of your beeswax!'
