Give Me Tonight

foolishly pleased by it. She was embarrassed to hear her own sheepish snicker.

'When?'

'I can't believe you haven't noticed! During dinner the other night, I asked him to pass the salt, and he was so busy watchin' you I got the pepper instead. I didn't say anything, of course-just took it like it was what I asked for-'

'Watching me? What was I doing?'

'Just talkin'. He pays attention whenever you start talkin'. And he listens to everything you say. Peter was trying to ask him some questions, and Ben just kept turnin' his head to listen to you, and finally Peter gave up. If you sweet-talked Ben a little, Adeline, you'd have him on the hook, and you could reel him in just as easy as-'

'Why would I want to reel him in? I've got Jeff Johnson. I thought you all wanted me to marry him.'

'Wellll… you and Jeff make a good pair,' Caroline conceded. 'I've always thought so. But between the two of 'em, I'd choose Ben Hunter in a minute.'

'Choose him for what? To be my beau? That's a ridiculous idea. And even if I didn't think so, Ben would laugh his head off at the notion. You heard Mama the other morning. Ben's a loner. He wouldn't want a relationship with a respectable woman.'

'I don't know 'bout that. Mama likes to exaggerate sometimes. She's just tryin' to steer you clear of Ben because she doesn't want you to wind up married to that kind of man. She thinks he's too much like Daddy.'

'What's wrong with that?'

'Mama told me once that even though she loved Daddy, it would've been easier if she'd married one of the beaus she'd had back east and stayed there. She's never really liked livin' out here, y'know. She won't ever feel like she really belongs. She comes from different stock. '

'Daddy said something like that to me the other day,' Addie said absently.

'Daddy's a strong-willed man. I guess Mama never realized how much, until it was too late. She always thought she could kind of bend him to her way of thinkin'. But she never could. So she wanted it to be easier for us than it was for her, which is why she encouraged me to marry Peter. And for the same reason, Mama's tryin' to marry you off to Jeff. They're both nice men, but kind of… soft. Do you know what I mean?'

'Soft? But Caro… you love Peter, don't you?' Caroline hesitated almost imperceptibly. 'Of course I do. He's a good man, a good husband and father. He's steady and loyal, and sweet-natured. But there's no vinegar between us.'

Despite the serious nature of the conversation, Addie couldn't help smiling. 'Vinegar?'

'You know that trick Mama taught us, about putting a little vinegar in when you're making pecan pie, to keep it from bein' too candy-sweet? That's what I'm talkin' about. Adeline, this is private talk, just between two sisters. I just don't want you to make a mistake. The kind of mistake that I… ' She stopped and shrugged helplessly.

'I'm listening,' Addie said, afraid Caroline wouldn't finish what she was trying to say. And she wanted very much to know what it was. She and Leah had never had this kind of talk. Leah had never known much about marriage, and Addie hadn't been especially interested in the subject until now.

'Well, I don't want you to get the wrong impression. I'm very happy, Adeline. Very happy. I'm just sayin' you need to be careful when you choose the man you're going to be with for the rest of your life. Don't pick someone you can manage too easy. You especially you-need a little vinegar in your marriage. '

'Are you saying you don't think I should marry Jeff'?'

Caroline sighed and laughed a little. 'You're so direct sometimes! Just as blunt as Daddy. No, I'm not sayin' anything about Jeff in particular. I'm telling you to marry someone who makes your heart pitter- patter. Mama and Daddy always taught us marriage is somethin' you have to calculate and plan. I… sometimes I wish I hadn't taken it to heart quite so well. No woman should be cheated of marryin' the man she loves, Adeline. There's no compensation for it later, no matter what they tell you.'

'Caro, you look so sad.'

'Sometimes I am, when I think about the mistakes I've made.'

'Was there ever someone you… still think about?'

'Maybe there was. A long time ago.'

'And you felt special about him?'

'Oh, yes. I felt special about him.' Caroline smiled remin-iscently, all at once looking younger and terribly wistful. 'He and I were at each other all the time, like cats and dogs. Like you and Ben. Seeing you two reminds me a little of what it was like. He was Daddy's trail boss. He was the kind of man that Daddy and Ben are. Very charming, but he liked to get his own way. Very stubborn. I thought I hated him at first. I felt so nervous around him. He always thought he knew everything.' She slipped one foot out of her shoe and wiggled her toes with a sigh. 'Lord, my feet are tired. '

'What happened between the two of you? You have to tell me the rest,' Addie said eagerly, intrigued by the thought that Caroline, with her wholesome face and picture-perfect manners, had been romantically involved with Russell's trail boss. What an odd pair they must have made!

'You can't talk about this to anyone else, ever. You have to promise. '

'I swear I won't. On the Bible. On anything you want me to.'

'All right,' Caroline interrupted, smiling slightly.

'The rest of the family knows about it-exceptin' Cade-so you'd most likely hear about it sooner or later.'

'I didn't know you'd ever been interested in anyone but Peter.'

'I met Peter durin' my two years at the academy in Virginia. He was going to military school, and we noticed each other at a dance. He looked very good in a uniform-what man doesn't? We struck up an acquaintance, and began to write each other, and he took me to meet his parents durin' one of our last vacations. He was so kind and sweet-natured, and everything just fell into place. We got engaged. Then I came home for a spell, and that was when I met Raif Colton. You were just a little girl. Do you remember him?'

'A little,' Addie lied. 'I guess I was too young to notice much about him.'

'As soon as we met each other, Raif set his sights on me-wouldn't leave me alone-which made me furious and sent Mama into a tailspin.' Caroline shook her head and made a wistful sound. 'Raif was so… so… I can't describe him. I felt like a different woman around him. I'd always been the quiet one. Russell Warner's oldest daughter, so well-behaved, so proper. No man had ever tried anything with me-y'know? But Raif cornered me in the house one day when no one was around, and…' Caroline looked at Addie's expectant face and blushed hotly. 'He let me know flow he felt about me. He was so tender, and frightening, and exciting. And after everything was said and done, I knew he loved me. But I was all set on marryin' Peter-the smart thing to do, the sensible thing. Mama knew about Raif, and she did everything in her power to keep us apart. All summer Peter and I stayed engaged, and plans for the wedding were made, and Raif did his best to convince me to marry him instead. '

'Did you love him?'

'I loved both of them. I loved Peter with my mind. I was safe with him. But I loved Raif with my heart. I loved his passion, his wildness. It was impossible to choose.'

'But you ended up marrying Peter.'

'Yes. I was afraid to take a chance on Raif'.'

'What happened to him?'

'After the marriage, he stayed on at the ranch for several months. I begged him to leave, but he wouldn't give up, even after he found out I was going to have a baby. It was hell-you can't know… Lord, you can't imagine. I had no peace, not for one minute. I found out the difference between loving a man with your mind and your heart. I came to realize the mistake I'd made, and I wanted to die of misery. I made a decision, that I'd run away with Raif. Nothin' was as important as he was, not money, family, honor. Not even Peter. We were goin' to leave together, after he came back from drivin' a thousand head of cattle up to Dodge. But one night on the trail, the longhorns got spooked. Crazy animals-they'll stampede at anything, even a sneeze. And Raif was