once.
'There's a lot can happen yet,* whispered Kelderek. 'Were you thinking of your mother?' 'No,' replied the boy. 'bout Sirit' 'Who's Sirit?* 'Girl was with us.' 'What's happened to her?' 'Gone to Leg-By-Lee.' 'Leg-By-Lee? Where's that?' 'Don't know.' 'Then how do you know she's gone there?' The boy said nothing. 'What is Leg-By-Lee? Who told you about it?' 'Where they go, see?' whispered the boy. 'Only anyone goes, we say they've gone to Leg- By-Lee.' 'Is it far away?' 'Don't know.' 'Well, if I managed to run away and he brought me back tomorrow, would I have gone to Leg-By-Lee?' 'No.' 'Why not?' ' 'Cause you don't come back from Leg-By-Lee.' 'You mean Sirit's dead?' 'Don't know.'
They fell silent. A man may be forced to set out into bitter cold, and in the very act of doing so be conscious that the future is desperate and his chance of survival small. Yet this mere reflection, coming at that moment, will not of itself be enough to break his spirit or penetrate his heart with despair. It is as though he still carried, wrapped about the core of his courage, a residue of protecting faith and warmth which must first be penetrated and dispelled, little by little, hour after hour, perhaps day after day, by solitude and cold, until the last remnants are dispersed and the dreadful truth, which at the outset he perceived only with his mind, he feels in his body and fears in his heart. So it was with Kelderek. Now, in the night, with the sharp, ugly noises of wretchedness all around him and the pain crawling about his body like cockroaches in a dark house, he seemed to step down, to review his situation from an even lower level, to feel more deeply and perceive more clearly its nature, devoid of all real hope. He believed, now, in the prospect before him – the passage of Linsho and the long journey up the Telthearna, actually passing Quiso and Ortelga, to Terekenalt; and then slavery, preceded perhaps by the vile mutilation of which Shouter had spoken. Worst of all was the loss of Melathys and the thought that they would remain ignorant for ever of each other's fates. It was Shardik who had brought him to this – Shardik who had pursued him with supernatural malevolence, avenging all that his priest-king had done to abuse and exploit him. He was justly accursed of Shardik, and in his punishment had involved not only Melathys but the Tuginda herself – she who had done all she could, in the face of every obstacle put in her way, to preserve the worship of Shardik from betrayal. With this bitter reflection he once more fell asleep.
50 Radu
When he woke it was sunrise: and as he stirred, a centipede as long as his hand, dark-red and sinuous, undulated smoothly away from beneath his body. Shouter was drawing out the chains and coiling them into his pack. The forest was raucous with the calling of birds. Already, where the sun shone, the ground was steaming, and everywhere flies buzzed about patches of night-soil and urine. A boy close by coughed without ceasing and all around the children raised their thin voices in foul language and oaths. Two boys lay quarrelling over a fragment of leather which one had stolen from the other, until Bled's stick brought them cursing to their feet.
Shouter gave out small handfuls of dried fruit and watched while they were eaten, his stick ready against any snatching or fighting. He winked at Kelderek and slipped him a second handful. 'Mind you eat it yourself, too,' he whispered, 'mucking quick.'
'Is that all until tonight?' answered Kelderek, appalled at the thought of the day's march.
'It's nigh all there is left anyway,' said Shouter, still keeping his voice down. 'He says there's no more to be had until we get to Linsho, and that's supposed to be tomorrow evening. I reckon he didn't know what this place was going to be like. We'll be lucky to get out alive.'
Kelderek, looking quickly to either side, whispered, 'I could get you out alive.'
Without waiting for an answer, he shuffled away to where Radu was feeding Shara from his own handful.
'You can't afford to do that,' he said. 'You've got to keep up your own strength if you want to be able to look after her.'
'I've done it before,' answered Radu. 'I'll be all right as long as she is.' He turned back to the little girl. 'We're going home soon, aren't we?' he said. 'You're going to show me the new calf, aren't you, when we get home?'
'All the way, underground,' said a boy standing near; but Shara only nodded and fell to making patterns with her stones.
Soon they began to move off, following Genshed towards the river bank. Once there the slave-trader turned upstream, making his way along the open, pebbly shore.
Now that they were no longer among the close trees and he could see the whole column, Kelderek understood, as he had not on the previous day, why their progress was so much interrupted and so slow. What he saw was an exhausted rabble, which surely could not be far from complete disintegration. Continually, one child or another would stop, leaning face forwards against a rock or bank and, when Bled or Shouter came up to threaten him, only staring back as though too much stupefied even to feel fear. From time to time a boy would fall and Genshed, Shouter or Bled would pull him to his feet and slap him or dash water in his face. The slave-dealer himself seemed well aware of the perishable condition of his stock. He was sparing with blows and called frequent halts, allowing the children to drink and bathe their feet. Once, when Bled, in a frenzy of rage, set about a boy who was fumbling and hesitating at the foot of a pile of rocks, he cuffed him away with a curse, asking where he thought he could sell a dead slave.
Later, as he and Radu lay gazing out across the glittering, noonday river, Kelderek, carefully keeping his voice low, said, 'Shouter must know that he's got all he ever can out of Genshed. Surely he must fear returning to Terckenalt? The best thing he could do would be to cut and run, and take us with him. I know how to survive in this sort of country. I could save his life and ours if only I could persuade him to trust me. Do you think Genshed's made him some promise?'
For a time Radu answered nothing, looking sideways into the shallows and stroking Shara's hands. At length he said, 'Genshed means more to him than you think. He's converted him, you see.' 'Converted him?'
'That's why I'm afraid of Genshed. I know we all fear his cruelty, but I fear more than that.'
'You mustn't let him break your spirit,' said Kelderek. 'He's nothing but a contemptible brute – a sneak thief – mean and stupid.'
'He was once,' answered Radu, 'but that was before he got the power he prayed for.' 'What do you mean? What power?' 'Where he's concerned, it's no longer a matter of thieves and honest men,' said Radu. 'He's gone beyond that. Once he was nothing but a cruel, nasty slum-creeper. But evil's made him strong. He's paid its price, and in return he's been given its power. You don't feel it yet, but you will. He's been granted the power to make others evil – to make them believe in the strength of evil, to inspire them to become as evil as himself. What he offers is the joy of evil, not just money, or safety, or anything that you and I could understand. He can make some people want to devote their lives to evil. That's what he did to Bled, only Bled wasn't up to it and it drove him mad. Shouter – he was just a poor, deserted boy, sold away from his home. It's not a question of how long he'll last with Genshed or what he'll get. He admires him – he wants to give him everything he's got – he isn't thinking about rewards. He wants to spend his life beating and hurting and terrifying. He knows he's not much good at it yet, but he hopes to improve.'
Their hunger was like a mist in the air between them. Kelderek, looking about him for Shara, caught sight of her kneeling beside a pool a little way off and pulling out long strips of bright-yellow and dark-red weed, which she laid side by side on the stones.
'All this is only your fancy, you know,' he said. 'You're lightheaded with hunger and hardship.'
'I'm light-headed, that's true enough,' answered Radu. 'But I can see more clearly for that. If you don't think it's true, you wait and see.'
He nodded towards Shara. 'It's for her sake that I've not given in,' he said. 'Genshed wanted me to become an overseer in place of Bled. Bled's become a nuisance to him – he can't be relied on not to cripple boys or kill them. He's killed three boys since Lapan, you know.'
'If you became an overseer, mightn't it give you a chance to escape?' 'Perhaps – from anyone but Genshed.'
'But did he only try to talk you into becoming an overseer? Didn't he threaten you? You told me he once used the fly-trap on you.'
