to-end suburbs spanned past. Tuxedo shop. Liquor store. Laundromat. Starbucks. Church. Chiropractor. A build- your-own-teddy-bear shop. Jiffy Lube. Walgreens. Babies R Us. Bed Bath & Beyond. He had not ridden in the passenger seat of a car in a long time, and it felt unnatural and dangerous, travelling down the roadway without steering wheel or pedals, without control. Strip mall abutted strip mall to create a continuous path of commerce over the land. Heather wound up the engine and pushed into the interstate lanes. Ellis asked, ‘Do you still think about Christopher?’
‘Are we going to talk now?’ she asked. ‘Have a conversation?’
‘Do you?’
‘Of course I do.’
‘Do you think often of the accident?’
‘No.’
‘You don’t.’
‘I hate to think of it.’
‘So you just stopped?’
‘I’d say it’s something that I’ve learned.’
‘What do you remember?’
‘I don’t like to remember.’
‘Why have we never talked about this?’
‘There are a lot things that we haven’t talked about. Maybe you’ve noticed.’ She looked at him, her expression closed and ungiving.
‘Heather,’ he said, and hesitated, and the two syllables stood open, an empty vessel. They were the last spoken for several miles.
But then he asked, ‘Will you tell me what you remember about Christopher’s accident?’
‘Why?’
‘Heather – please.’
‘I walked from school to the gas station to buy a 7-Up and to call my dad for a ride. And I was standing in the parking lot when I heard the brakes and turned and saw one car slam into another.’ She spoke flatly. ‘There was an enormous explosion and a fire-ball. When it had settled down and my eyes readjusted, I saw that the car was Christopher’s. I ran to it. By the time I got there, he was already out, and he went to the other car.’ She stared ahead. ‘There were screams and it was hot and Christopher went into the car and came out with someone, and the fire was spreading and he went in, and the fire and smoke were everywhere, and he was trying to go in even further. He kept trying, and I was screaming at him to come out. Then he just stopped. I tried to pull him out. Someone dragged me away.’
‘Did you call your dad from the gas station?’
‘What?’
‘You said that was the reason you were at the gas station.’
‘I was waiting. I knew he wouldn’t be home yet.’
‘Did you buy the 7-Up?’
‘I guess so, yes. I remember the cold of it in my hand when the heat of the explosion pushed out over me.’
‘How long did it take you to recognise the
‘I don’t know. Why?’
‘Where was Christopher when you first saw him?’
‘This is a strange conversation,’ she said.
‘Did anyone else get out of the
‘Oh God. Ellis -’
‘Were there two people in the
‘Did John tell you to ask these questions?’
‘Well, there were two people in the car at the time of the collision.’
‘Did John tell you that?’
‘I looked at the car.’
‘You think I was in there? That’s what John thought.’
Ellis said nothing.
‘I wasn’t,’ she said.
‘Who then?’
‘Christopher was alone.’
‘These things are never knowable to one hundred per cent certainty,’ Ellis said, ‘but the evidence is pretty clear. Someone sat in the driver’s seat and someone else sat in the passenger seat. Both wore seat belts. I think you were in the car. In fact, you were driving. And your dad manipulated the accident report.’
She pulled to the side of the road and stopped, tyres scraping on the gravel, and she bent forward and gasped.
‘Isn’t that right?’ he asked.
‘I watched from the gas station with a can of 7-Up in my hand. You have no idea how much you sound like John.’
It is over, he thought, this is the end. He breathed shallowly and she stared at the steering wheel and time passed.
‘Do you want me to drive?’ he asked.
She opened her door, stood out of the car. He thought she might walk away, but she circled the car, and he stood out and circled the car, and he began to drive.
A boy and an older man – presumably the boy’s father – huddled together over something in the lawn, a white-and-red cylinder with tailfins.
‘What are they doing?’
‘Water rocket.’
The father began to work a small hand pump.
‘No concrete,’ she observed.
‘You remember.’
‘Of course.’
‘Do you know the difference between a cheeseburger and a blow job?’
‘No.’
‘Then let’s go get lunch.’
She glanced at him, but her expression didn’t change. She said softly, ‘You were afraid of me.’
‘When’s the last time you were here?’ Ellis asked.
‘Before the accident.’
‘When?’
She sat looking at the house. ‘I met him here earlier that day, I think.’
‘You left with him in the
In the lawn, the boy and his father stepped back, and in a shrill voice the boy shouted, ‘Ten! Nine! Eight!’ At zero, the rocket shot into the sky.
‘I don’t remember.’ She sighed. ‘That ox yoke is ridiculous.’
‘But you think you got out of his car at some point and went to the school and then went to the gas station and waited there for your dad to pick you up.’
Something crashed just above their heads, and Ellis threw his hands up. Heather screamed.
‘The rocket,’ Ellis said.
‘I think my heart really stopped.’
The boy and father came running, and the father took the rocket off the roof of the car, grinning and mouthing, ‘Sorry.’
‘But why would you go back to the school?’
‘I had friends in choir. Maybe I met one of them. I don’t know.’ The father and son crouched to prepare a second launch. They stepped back and counted down, but this time the rocket only lifted a foot or so before it
