rented morning suit, and surveyed himself miserably in the glass.
Jimmy came in, similarly attired. “Cheer up, Hamish. It’s your wedding day. And you’re going off on your honeymoon. Think of all that hot sun.”
If only I could win the lottery, thought Hamish. We could live in separate houses. Why on earth did I not just promise to pay maintenance for the child and remain single? But in his heart he knew that in an old- fashioned village like Lochdubh it would be looked on as a scandal. Daviot would never stand for it. Seducing a policewoman!
“I gather we don’t have a limo to take us to the kirk,” said Jimmy.
“It’s only a few yards. We walk.”
“Your ma must be pleased.”
“Aye, she’s looking forward to seeing some grandchildren,” said Hamish. He had been avoiding his family of late, frightened that that strange highland telepathy might pick up on his distress. He had not even introduced Josie to them, making excuses time after time that she was out on a job.
“Well, let’s go,” said Jimmy impatiently. “Want a drink?”
“No.” Hamish made his way to the kitchen door. He bent down and patted Lugs and Sonsie. Angela had promised to look after them while he was on honeymoon.
They walked out of the police station and on to the waterfront. It was a perfect day. Hardly a ripple disturbed the blue waters of the loch. A group of fishermen heading for the church gave a ragged cheer.
Hamish looked around himself bleakly. He felt he was saying goodbye to all the happy times he had known. “Man, you’re as white as a sheet,” said Jimmy.
The church was full to the bursting point. He took his place at the altar with Jimmy at his side and sent one last desperate prayer upwards. “Dear God, if there is a God, get me out of this!”
“You look right miserable,” hissed Jimmy.
“I’m still a bit weak,” said Hamish. Priscilla Halburton-Smythe had sent him a congratulatory message from Australia along with her apologies that she was unable to attend.
There was a murmur of anticipation. Then the choir burst into a rendering of “You’ll Never Walk Alone.” “Yuk,” murmured Jimmy. “Did you think o’ that one, Hamish?”
“Nothing to do wi’ me,” he muttered.
Then Charlotte, Josie’s bridesmaid, hurried up the aisle and said to Hamish, “You’ve got to come outside. Those wretched pets of yours are stopping Josie entering the church. It’s a disgrace, that’s what it is.”
Hamish ran down the aisle and outside. Josie stood there on the arm of her uncle. In front of them, barring the way, stood Sonsie, hissing, fur raised, and Lugs barking like mad.
“That’s enough!” shouted Hamish. “Off home the pair o’ ye.”
They slunk off and Hamish went back into the church and up to his former position at the altar. The choir, which had fallen silent, burst out into song again.
Hamish stared straight ahead as Josie made her way up the aisle.
Jimmy turned round. “My, she’s got fat,” he said. “Has she got a bun in the oven?”
“Shut up!” said Hamish.
When Josie stood next to him, he stared straight ahead.
Something’s far wrong here, thought Jimmy suddenly. He’s hating this. What can I do now? I can pretend to have lost the ring. Maybe that’ll help.
Hamish did not listen to the opening words of the marriage service.
Then Mr. Wellington said the piece about anyone having any reason against this marriage to speak now or forever hold their peace.
The church doors crashed open and a clear voice said, “I have.”
There was a babble of shocked alarm as Elspeth strode up the aisle.
“Explain yourself,” shouted Mrs. Wellington.
Elspeth faced the congregation. “This woman, Josie McSween,” she said, her voice dripping with contempt, “has tried to trick Hamish into marriage. At one time, I believe, she doped his drink with Rohypnol- it’s commonly known as a date-rape drug. She pretended she was pregnant. Hamish took a urine sample and a blood sample to the forensic lab in Strathbane. They lied to him and told him he was in the clear. I have confirmation from a forensic lab in Aberdeen.”
Her eyes ranged over the congregation and settled on Lesley and Bruce. “Yes, I took the samples out of your lab. So sue me! Josie got a certificate from a shady doctor in Strathbane to say she was pregnant. I wondered whether he would admit to it. Listen to this!”
She switched on the tape recorder. The congregation listened in appalled silence. Josie turned to flee. Charlotte shouted after her, “You stole my pregnancy kit, you wee bitch!”
Flora hurried after her daughter. Josie jumped in the limousine, waiting outside. Her mother climbed in after her.
“ Perth!” shrieked Josie to the driver as the congregation began to stream out of the church.
Lesley and Bruce found Daviot looming over them. “You are suspended from duty pending a full enquiry,” he said. “Not another word.”
As they went off, Daviot turned round and saw Jimmy. “Where is Hamish? This is awful. I am sure he is not recovered from that shooting.”
“He’s down on the beach,” called Angela.
They all rushed to the waterfront wall.
Hamish Macbeth was turning cartwheels along the beach with the dog and cat prancing beside him.
Instead of being delighted that Hamish had escaped being tricked into marriage, a good number of the villagers were feeling positively sulky. They trooped up to the manse to retrieve their wedding presents. They thought that at least the reception might have gone ahead and let them enjoy a party, but Flora had stopped on the road to cancel everything. Because Flora had employed a catering firm who were already packing everything up, there was nothing they could do but mutter that Hamish should have known something was wrong.
In the police station later, Jimmy said the same thing. “Had ye gone daft?” he asked. “Couldn’t you tell when you’d had sex or not?”
“How could I think otherwise?” said Hamish. “I woke up and there she was, in the bed. Then she gets proof she’s pregnant. What else could I do?”
Superintendent Daviot walked into the kitchen without knocking. “This is a bad business,” he said. “I want a full statement from you, Macbeth. Forensic experts are hard to find. There’s to be a full enquiry. Josie McSween is not fit for the police force. She will need to make a statement as well. But I cannot understand how an experienced policeman like yourself came to be tricked.”
Hamish was beginning to wonder the same thing himself but Jimmy leapt to his defence.
“How was he to know, sir?” he asked. “A good copper goes by the evidence, and Josie had all the evidence.”
“Dr. Cameron has been arrested,” said Daviot. “He won’t weasel out of this charge the way he did the last one.”
“How did Josie get the Rohypnol?” wondered Hamish. “Maybe she got it out of the evidence room. There was a case last year where it was used.”
“The press are all gathered outside,” said Daviot. “You’ll need to speak to them or we’ll never get rid of them.”
“Could you do that?” asked Hamish. “You’re awfy good wi’ the press.”
“I will do that now,” said Daviot, who adored getting any sort of publicity. “We’ll put it out that you are still weak after that shooting. Where were you supposed to be going on honeymoon?”
“ Corsica. Tomorrow morning. For a week.”
“Then I suggest you take yourself off there while we sort things out here and return in time for the board of enquiry.”
