lied or even what she lied about? What difference did it make to any of us? Those tits were terrific either way and that’s why we’d brought her along. Goddam right.
Then I pictured myself standing there and felt like a damned fool. I dropped the curtain and took another big gulp from the tumbler, striped to my underwear, turned off the light and got into bed. And the booze carried me right off.
It was still dark when I woke with a parched tongue and a throbbing head. I felt my way along the wall to the bathroom and switched on the light. With my mouth to the spigot I drank till my belly was bloated. I was about to snap off the light when I saw somebody on the floor by the door and for a moment thought Buck had come back and passed out before he could make it to his bed. And then I saw it was her.
She was sitting up and watching me, hugging her knees to her breasts, the skirt of her dress tucked between her legs. The way the shadows fell across her face her bad eye looked like a black patch.
“The light woke me,” she said. “For a minute I didn’t remember where I was and I couldn’t see it was you in there and I thought I was having a bad dream.”
“When’d you come in?”
“I don’t know. A while ago.”
“Buck?”
“The other cabin.” She sniffed and wiped at her nose. “I didn’t mean to come in without asking, but I didn’t want to wake you. I tried to sleep in the car but it’s got so cold out and I didn’t have a blanket or anything and…I’m sorry.”
“Why you on the floor? Why didn’t you get in the other bed?”
“I didn’t want to be using his bed if he came over here.”
I helped her up and sat her on the edge of my bed. I lit two cigarettes and handed her one. “So what happened?” I said.
She’d been awakened by his knocking on the door. He said to open up, it was cold out there. She thought we were getting ready to leave right away for some reason. She turned on the light and quickly got dressed, then unlocked the door. He came in and locked it again. When she saw his eyes she knew he was very drunk and knew what it was he wanted. She’d seen a lot of drunk men back in Corsicana and had learned to fear them all. She asked him please to go, but he said there wasn’t any need to play the innocent, not with him.
She was afraid to do anything but stand there while he ran his hands over her and up under her dress. He told her to take her clothes off and get on the bed. Then he switched off the light and took off his shoes and pants and got in bed with her. At first she thought he had his hand down there and was pushing on her with the tip of his thumb—and then was astonished to realize that what was rubbing on her was his “thing.” What there was of it. He rubbed and rubbed himself on her and then it was over and he rolled off her and turned his face to the wall. She thought he might’ve been crying. She hadn’t known she’d been crying too until she got up and went into the bathroom to clean herself and saw her face in the mirror.
When she came out he had the cover pulled over him and was snoring. She had no idea how long she stood there before finally putting on her dress and shoes and going out to the car and lying down on the seat. But she couldn’t sleep for the cold and she kept listening for her cabin door to open. Finally she came to my door and tried it and found it unlocked and came in real quiet and curled up next to the wall. She didn’t think she’d be able to sleep but she must’ve because next thing she knew she saw the light in the bathroom.
“He threaten to hurt you if you didn’t do like he said?”
“No, he never.”
“Then why do it if you didn’t want to?”
“I thought I had to. I thought you were right outside.”
“Come again? You thought
“I thought…I thought you were waiting to be next.”
And then she was crying into her hands again.
Well hell. After a minute I put an arm around her and she leaned into me with her face on my chest. Her crying became a case of hiccups, and when I chuckled at the mix of hics and sobs, she hit me lightly on the shoulder with her fist and said, “It’s not—
“Let’s try and get some sleep,” I said. “Sun’ll be up soon. You can have this bed.”
She lay down and I covered her with the blanket and tucked it around her. Then got in Buck’s bed and under the blanket.
I don’t know how much time passed before she said, “Sonny?” She said it so softly I wasn’t sure I’d heard it. “You awake?”
“What?”
“Charlie told me the trouble you had in Loosiana.”
“She did, huh?”
“Was it terrible in prison?”
“What do you think?”
“It must’ve been terrible.”
“Go to sleep.”
“I’m glad you got away.”
“Not as glad as I am. Now go to sleep.”
Another minute went by.
“Sonny?”
“Christ’s sake, what?”
“I’m glad you weren’t waiting to be next.”
“Do I have to go knock you on the head to shut you up?”
She chuckled. “You wouldn’t neither. You’re too nice.”
I came awake up with my head still hurting and discovered her lying beside me. No telling how long she’d been there. She was rolled in her blanket like an Indian, her back to me, her ass against my hip. I had an urgent erection, and my first inclination was to use it on her. Then I remembered how pathetic she’d looked last night, and how she’d thought I’d been waiting to take a turn. I’d never been prone to confusion about myself or about women, but if somebody had put a gun to my head at that moment and demanded to know exactly what I was feeling, I couldn’t have given a straight answer.
She stirred and started to come awake. I rolled on my side away from her and feigned to be still sleeping. She lay still for a minute, then eased out of bed. I waited till I heard the bathroom door click shut and then got up and put my clothes on.
When she came out and saw me she blushed. Then looked down at herself and said, “Will you
The others weren’t there yet but we went ahead and ordered. Several mugs of coffee and some fried eggs and sausage and hash-browns and biscuits dripping with butter all helped put a cushion on my hangover. Belle ordered the same thing but only picked at it. She was nervous and kept cutting her eyes to the front door. I was feeling a little squirmy myself. She probably sensed it and didn’t even try to make small talk.
I was done eating when Buck showed up. I’d figured he’d get there ahead of Russell and Charlie, who were prone to a morning hump and were usually the last ones to the table. He slid into the seat opposite us in the booth and gave a lopsided grin. His eyes were badly bloodshot. “Feel like I been run over by a damn booze truck,” he said. The waitress came with a mug of coffee for him and took his order and went away again.
He lit a cigarette and smiled at Belle. She was looking at her plate and pushing her food around with her fork. “When I woke up by my lonesome,” he said, “I figured you’d gone to see if young Romeo here could use some company too.” He winked at me. “She’s a darling, ain’t she?”
I wasn’t smiling, and he finally seemed to tune in to our mood.
“What?” he said.
“She didn’t like what you did last night,” I said. I hadn’t intended to be so blunt, but there it was.
“Say what?” He looked at me like I’d spoken in a foreign language.
“You scared her, man,” I said. “She’d rather you don’t do that again.”
