Revenge of the Middle-Aged Woman

‘He isn’t, Poppy’

‘You could have fooled me. Fact: Dad buggers off with another woman and, not content with looking a fool – although, I agree, there are lots of other men to keep him company – he wants to turf you out of our home so he can install his trophy woman here without any trouble to him. He won’t even have to pack,’ She turned to Nathan. ‘Full marks for economy of effort, Dad.’ Under her onslaught Nathan turned white. ‘It’s true, isn’t it, Dad? Isn’t it?

Now Nathan was grey. When he had first taken Minty into his arms and helped himself to that glossy body, he could not have imagined for one minute that he would have to endure the lash of his daughter’s judgement. ‘Apologize,’ he said, through clenched teeth.

‘No, I won’t. I’m out of the net. I’m an independent woman.’

‘Well, that’s good.’ Nathan lost the battle with his temper. ‘I’ll stop the allowance. And if you think you’re getting a party because you want to celebrate the fact that you married that idiot, you can think again.’

I stepped forward and put a hand on his arm. ‘Nathan, enough.’

Poppy whipped off her glasses and dropped them on to the table. ‘Isn’t that like you?’ she spat back, eyes huge with fury. ‘“If you don’t do what I want…” I thought you were supposed to be my father who supports me. I knew it. I knew it. The minute I do something my way… Richard warned me.’

And what did Richard say about our family, about which he knows precisely nothing?’

‘Perhaps that’s because you never so much as said good morning to him without making it perfectly plain what you felt.’ Half blind without the glasses, she thrust her face at Nathan. ‘You’ve conveniently abandoned Mum, and now you want to abandon me, and you can’t possibly bring yourself to be nice to my husband. Well, fine’. She fumbled on the table for her glasses and snatched them up. ‘I’d better warn Sam that he’s next.’

She ran from the room and up the stairs.

Nathan sat down abruptly. He looked much older, and wretched. ‘She’s right,’ I said flatly. ‘You should support her.’

Nathan stared at the fountain. ‘I hate that thing,’ he said. ‘Always have.’

‘I’ll turn it off.’

Nathan failed to master his feelings, and they spilled over. ‘If I had been told only a year ago that I would find myself in this position, Rose, I would have laughed myself sick. I probably wouldn’t even have listened. Now, I hate myself. Why? I thought I had it so clear in my head. Minty arrived out of the blue, and I thought I knew why, but I don’t think I did. Or do. And I don’t have time to sit down and work it out.’

‘It’s too late for explanations.’ I bit my lip. ‘But I can’t understand why you let it go so far.’

‘She bewitched me. I was at an age when I wanted to be bewitched. A middle-aged man. The stuff of comedy. Very simple, really.’

I caught my breath. Does she still bewitch you? I wanted to ask him. ‘Isn’t it curious, Nathan, how much more orderly and loyal children are? Far better behaved than adults, with their affairs, divorces and mayhem.’

Nathan’s lips twitched. About the house, Rose. I promise I was thinking of you as well as me. Being able to give you more money, I mean.’

Upstairs, Poppy was moving about, drawers opened and shut. There was a blast of pop music. The sounds were upsetting and discordant. Then she ran downstairs into the hall, talking away into her mobile. ‘You were right… He’s unreasonable… I hate him. My father…’

Nathan winced and his face distorted.

Once upon a time, I had imagined that I would die when I left Hal. But I didn’t. Instead I grew and, like the green tree in the story, gave forth fruit and flourished. Depending on your point of view, it was a happy ending. But I had learnt I was not the kind of woman to whom the Good Fairy automatically gravitated: I had to make my own happy endings. Which brought me back to a question of will.

I planted myself in front of him. ‘Nathan, I hope Minty and her bewitchment is worth it. You must make it worth it. We can’t go through all this only for you to say you don’t know why you did it. You can’t be fuzzy and undecided while everything is being destroyed.’

In response, he dropped his head into his hands. I felt anguished by this exchange, anguished about Poppy. Equally, I knew I would not die from love, abandonment, or losing my house. It was no use thinking about the pelican plucking out the feathers from her bloody breast to help her young. My downy, precious daughter needed help and some sort of order had to be pulled from this family’s chaos.

I closed the sitting-room door. ‘Now, listen to me. Here’s the deal. If you agree to back Poppy and give a party to show the world we’re happy and approve, I will sell my half of the house to you.’ I leant back against the door. ‘But I will insist on the full price. As you have pointed out, I must be practical. I also insist that I stay here until at least the spring. You owe me that.’

The door handle was smooth and cold under my fingers. I shut my eyes. She had won. Cool, thieving Minty would click through this house on her kitten heels. Invader and plunderer, her hands would touch my things, my shelter, my spaces.

I understood her better now, much better than when she had worked for me. The answers had come to me during the nights, the wakeful ones, the ones without dreams. Minty had become frightened by life hurtling past. She was worried that she had been in the sun too long and was in danger of drying up.

‘Nathan, does Minty know of this grand plan?’

He had the grace to look discomforted. ‘I thought I’d settle it with you first.’

What would Minty say? Would it be as straightforward as Nathan had calculated? Probably not, but that was Nathan’s business. I said quickly, ‘If you behave over the party, I’ll undertake to deal with the rest of the details as quickly as I can.’

Nathan got up and rested his hands on the mantelpiece, sifting over the pros and cons. The money. Could he forgive Poppy? How much longer could he tolerate living in Minty’s cramped flat? ‘You mean it?’

‘Yes, I do.’

I felt a sudden release. The lance of a boil. I had let go.

Nathan poked at a china saucer and figurine, which was all that remained on the mantelpiece since the removal of his mother’s vase, and dislodged my wedding ring, which had remained there ever since I had taken it off all those months ago. He picked it up, frowned, and rolled it between his fingers. ‘Will you replace Parsley? I mean, of course you can’t replace … but will you get another cat one day?’

‘I’d rather replace my cat than replace a wedding ring.’

Nathan winced. ‘I see. OK.’ He put down the ring and pulled out his car keys. ‘It’s a deal, then.’

Still leaning on the door, I explored the thinner curves of my waist and back, which felt good. ‘Incidentally, won’t this house be too big for you?’

Nathan jingled the keys in a self-conscious manner and I knew that something was coming that had a bearing on the conversation and that should have been mentioned earlier. ‘Actually, Rose, Minty wants to start a family.’ Nathan frowned. ‘She’s keen. Very keen. It would make sense to be here.’

‘I think you’re mad.’ Vee dabbed crossly at the peppermint teabags in the mugs.

We were in her rustic kitchen (rustic in urbs, that is), to which I had fled. A collection of herbs and saucepans hung from a stainless-steel butcher’s rack in the ceiling, and there was an amphora-shaped jar of sun-dried tomatoes in oil by the stove. Vee had been doing her get-ready-for-autumn wash. The whole place smelt of damp pashminas (‘too damn expensive to dry-clean them’), which were draped over clothes horses. Our conversation was punctuated by the shrieks of the children, who were in front of the television at one end of the kitchen.

‘What are they watching?’ I asked.

Vee glanced in the direction of the television. ‘It’s a safety video. It teaches them not to talk to strangers, never to accept sweets, that sort of thing, and to tell an adult if they see anyone hanging around.’

Out of the corner of my eye, I caught a frame of a man in a beige raincoat sitting on a park bench and two children running away from him.

Annabel was lying on her stomach and had buried her face in the floor. Mark was fiddling with a brightly