Woolcott's first lines in The Man Who Came to Dinner.'
'I'll trade places with any dogface right now,' said Jerry.
'What's a dogface?' asked Corrie.
'Well, I guess originally it was supposed to mean a doughboy; but now it sort of means any enlisted man, more specifically a private.'
'Any G-I Joe,' said Shrimp.
'What a strange language!' said Corrie. 'And I thought I understood English.'
'It isn't English,' said Tarzan. 'It's American. It's a young and virile language. I like it.'
'But what is a doughboy? And a G-I Joe?'
'A doughboy is an infantryman. A G-I Joe is an American soldier—Government Issue. Stick with us, Corrie, and we'll improve your American and ruin your English,' concluded Jerry.
'If you will pay special attention to Sergeant Rosetti's conversation they will both be ruined,' said Bubonovitch.
'Wot's wrong wit my American, wise guy?' demanded Shrimp.
'I think Sergeant Shrimp is cute,' said Corrie.
Rosetti flushed violently. 'Take a bow, cutie,' said Bubonovitch.
Shrimp grinned. He was used to being ribbed, and he never got mad, although sometimes he pretended to be. 'I ain't heard no one callin' you cute, you big cow,' he said, and he felt that with that come-back his honor had been satisfied.
Chapter 9
BEFORE supper, Tarzan had cut two large slabs of bark from a huge tree in the forest. The slabs were fully an inch thick, tough and strong. From them he cut two disks, as nearly sixteen and a half inches in diameter as he could calculate. In about one half of the periphery of each disk he cut six deep notches, leaving five protuberances between them.
After supper, Jerry and the others, sitting around the fire, watched him. 'Now what the heck are those for?' asked the pilot. 'They looked like round, flat feet with five toes.'
'Thank you,' said Tarzan. 'I didn't realize that I was such a good sculptor. These are to deceive the enemy. I have no doubt but that that old villain will return with Japs just as quickly as he can. Now those natives must be good trackers, and they must be very familiar with our spoor, for they followed it here. Our homemade sandals would identify our spoor to even the stupidest tracker. So we must obliterate it.
'First we will go into the forest in a direction different from the one we intend taking, and we will leave spoor that will immediately identify our party. Then we will cut back to camp through the undergrowth where we can walk without leaving footprints, and start out on the trail we intend taking. Three of us will walk in single file, each stepping exactly in the footprints of the man ahead of him. I will carry Cor-rie. It would tire her to take a man's stride. Bubonovitch will bring up the rear, wearing one of these strapped to each foot. With one of them he will step on each and every footprint that we have made. He will have to do a considerable split to walk with these on, but he is a big man with long legs. These will make the footprints of an elephant and obliterate ours.'
'Geeze!' exclaimed Rosetti. 'A elephant's feet ain't that big!'
'I'm not so sure myself about these Indian elephants,' admitted Tarzan. 'But the circumference of an African elephant's front foot is half the animal's height at the shoulder. So these will indicate an elephant approximately nine feet in height. Unfortunately, Bubonovitch doesn't weigh as much as an elephant; so the spoor won't be as lifelike as I'd like. But I'm banking on the likelihood that they won't pay much attention to elephant spoor while they are looking for ours. If they do, they are going to be terribly surprised to discover the trail of a two-legged elephant.
'Had we been in Africa the problem would have been complicated by the fact that the African elephant has five toes in front and three behind. That would have necessitated another set of these, and Jerry would have had to be the hind legs.'
'De sout' end of a elephant goin' nort', Cap,' said Shrimp.
'I'm not selfish,' said Jerry. 'Bubonovitch can be the whole elephant.'
'You'd better put Shrimp at the head of the column,' said Bubonovitch, 'I might step on him.'
'I think we'd better turn in now,' said Tarzan. 'What time have you, Jerry?'
'Eight o'clock.'
'You have the first watch tonight—two and a half hours on. That will bring it just right. Shrimp draws the last—3:30 to 6:00. Good night!'
They started early the following morning after a cold breakfast. First they made the false trail. Then they started off in the direction they intended taking, Bubonovitch bringing up the rear, stamping down hard on the footprints of those who preceded him. At the end of a mile, which was as far as Tarzan thought necessary to camouflage their trail, he was a pretty tired elephant. He sat down beside the trail and took off his cumbersome feet. 'Migawd!' he said. 'I'm just about split to the chin. Whoever wants to play elephas maximus of the order Proboscidea can have these goddam things.' He tossed them into the trail.
Tarzan picked them up and threw them out into the underbrush. 'It was a tough assignment, Sergeant; but you were the best man for it.'
'I could have carried Corrie.'
'An' you wit a wife an' kid!' chided Shrimp.
'I think the colonel pulled rank on you,' said Jerry.
'Oh, no,' said Tarzan; 'it was just that I couldn't think of throwing Corrie to the wolves.'
'I guess dat will hold you,' observed Shrimp.
Corrie was laughing, her eyes shining. She liked these Americans with their strange humor, their disregard for conventions. And the Englishman, though a little more restrained, was much like them. Jerry had told her that he was a viscount, but his personality impressed her more than his title.
Suddenly Tarzan raised his head and tested the air with his nostrils. 'Take to the trees,' he said.
'Is something coming?' asked Corrie.
'Yes. One of the sergeant's relatives—with both ends. It is a lone bull, and sometimes they are mean.'
He swung Corrie to an overhanging branch, as the others scrambled up the nearest trees. Tarzan smiled. They were becoming proficient. He remained standing in the trail.
'You're not going to stay there?' demanded Jerry.
'For a while. I like elephants. They are my friends. Most of them like me. I shall know in plenty of tune if he is going to charge.'
'But this is not an African elephant,' insisted Jerry.
'Maybe he never heard of Tarzan,' suggested Shrimp.
'The Indian elephant is not so savage as the African, and I want to try an experiment. I have a theory. If it proves incorrect, I shall take to the trees. He will warn me, for if he is going to charge, he will raise his ears, curl up his trunk, and trumpet. Now, please don't talk or make any noise. He is getting close.'
The four in the trees waited expectantly. Corrie was frightened—frightened for Tarzan. Jerry thought it foolish for the man to take such chances. Shrimp wished that he had a tommy gun—just in case. Every eye was glued on the turn in the trail, at the point where the elephant would first appear.
Suddenly the great bulk of the beast came into view. It dwarfed Tarzan. When the little eyes saw Tarzan, the animal stopped. Instantly the ears were spread and the trunk curled up. It is going to charge was the thought of those in the trees.
Corrie's lips moved. Silently they formed the plea, 'Quick, Tarzan! Quick!'
And then Tarzan spoke. He spoke to the elephant in the language that he believed was common to most beasts—the mother tongue of the great apes. Few could speak it, but he knew that many understood it. 'Yo, Tantor, yo!' he said.
The elephant was weaving from side to side. It did not trumpet. Slowly the ears dropped and the trunk uncurled. 'Yud!' said Tarzan.
