I paused, then said, 'That's what we believe, Dan. That's what we strive to do—part of what we strive to do, anyway.'
Dan listened, frowning. 'I'm still not sure what all that means.'
'You'll learn more about it in school. We say education is the most direct pathway to God. For now, it's enough to say that verse just means that flattering or begging God isn't useful. Learn what God does. Learn to shape that to your needs. Learn to use it, or at least, learn to adapt to it so that you won't get squashed by it. That's useful.'
'So you're saying praying doesn't work.'
'Oh, no. Praying does work. Praying is a very effective way of talking to
I paused, thinking of how well Dan had done just that when he tried to rescue his parents. 'It doesn't always work the way we want it to,' I said. 'But it's always worth the effort.'
'Even if when I pray, I ask God to help me?' he asked.
'Even so,' I said. 'You're the one your words reach and strengthen. You can think of it as praying to that part of God that's within you.'
He thought about that for a while, then looked at me as though he had a big question, but hadn't yet decided how to ask it. He looked down at the book.
'How do you know you're right?' he asked at last. 'I mean, that guy who wants to be President, that Jarret, he would call you all heathens or pagans or something.'
Indeed, he would. 'Yes,' I said. 'He does seem to enjoy calling people things like that. Once he's made everyone
'My dad says ...' The boy stopped and swallowed. 'My dad said Jarret's an idiot.'
'I agree with your dad.'
'But how do you know you're right?' he insisted. 'How do you know Earthseed is true. Who says it's true?'
'You do, Dan.' I let him chew on that for a while, then went on. 'You learn, you think, you question. You question us and you question yourself. Then, if you find Earthseed to be true, you join us. You help us teach others. You help others the way we've helped you and your sisters.' Another pause. 'Spend some time reading this book. The verses are short and they mean what they say, although that may not be all that they mean. Read them and think about them. Then you can begin asking questions.'
'I've been reading,' he said. 'Not this book, but other things. Nothing to do but read while I could hardly move. The Balters gave me novels and things. And... I've been thinking that I shouldn't be here, living soft, eating good food, and reading books. I've been thinking that I ought to be out, looking for my sisters Nina and Paula. I'm the oldest, and they're lost. I'm the man of the family now. I should be looking for them.'
That was the most alarming thing he had said so far. 'Dan, we have no way of knowing—'
'Yeah. No one knows if they're alive or where they are or if they're still together.... I know. I keep thinking about all