Cemetery Dance

At the sound of the name, the old lady seemed to startle. 'Why,' she cried in a suddenly strong voice, 'how are you, Diogenes, my dear? What acharming surprise!' She turned to the nearest attendant and rapped out in a shrill voice, 'Bring out the best Amontillado. Diogenes has paid us a visit.' She turned and smiled broadly, her face wrinkling grotesquely. 'Or would you prefer tea, dearest Diogenes?'

'Nothing, thank you,' said Pendergast, his voice cool. 'It is Aloysius, Aunt Cornelia, not Diogenes.'

'Nonsense! Diogenes, you bad thing, don't try to tease an old woman. Don't you think I know my own nephew?'

Pendergast hesitated a moment. 'I never could fool you, Aunt. We were in the area and thought we'd drop in.'

'How lovely. Yes, I see you brought my brother Ambergris with you.'

Pendergast glanced over at D'Agosta briefly before nodding.

'I have a few minutes before I have to start preparing for the dinner party. You know how it is with servants these days. I should fire them all and do it myself.'

'Indeed.'

D'Agosta waited as Pendergast engaged his aunt in what seemed like interminable small talk. Slowly, the agent brought the conversation back to his own childhood in New Orleans.

'I wonder if you remember that, ah, unpleasantness with Marie LeBon, one of the downstairs servants,' he asked at last. 'We children used to call her Miss Marie.'

'The one who looked like a broomstick? I never liked her. She gave me the heebie — jeebies.' And Aunt Cornelia gave a delicious shudder.

'She was found dead one day, isn't that right?'

'It is most unfortunate when the servants bring scandal into the house. And Marie was the worst of the lot. Except, of course, for that dreadful,dreadful Monsieur Bertin.' The old woman shook her head in distaste and muttered something under her breath.

'Can you tell me what happened with Miss Marie? I was just a child then.'

'Marie was from the bayou, a promiscuous woman, like so many of the swamp folk. A mixture of French Acadian and Micmac Indian, and who knows what else besides. She got to fooling around with the groom, who was married — you remember, Diogenes, that groom with the pompadour who fancied himself a gentleman? The man was as common as dirt.'

She looked around. 'Where is my drink? Gaston!'

One of the attendants lifted a Dixie cup to her lips, and she sucked daintily through the straw. 'I prefer gin, as you know,' she said.

'Yes, ma'am,' said the attendant, with a smirk at his partner.

'What happened?' Pendergast asked.

'The groom's wife — God bless her — didn't care for Marie LeBon congressing with her husband. She wreaked her revenge.' She cackled. 'Settled her hash with a meat cleaver. I didn't think she had it in her.'

'The jealous wife's name was Mrs. Ducharme.'

'Mrs. Ducharme! A big woman with arms like French hams. She knew how to swing that cleaver!'

'Mr. Pendergast?' said the doctor. 'I have warned you about these types of interviews before.'

Pendergast ignored him. 'Wasn't there something strange about the… corpse?' 'Strange? What do you mean?'

'The… Vodou aspects.'

'Vodou? Diogenes! It was not Vodou, but Obeah. There's a difference, you know. Yes, but of course you know. Certainly more than your brother does, eh? Though he is no stranger to it, either — is he?' And here the old woman began chuckling unpleasantly.

'We were talking about the corpse—' Pendergast said by way of encouragement.

'There was something strange, now that you mention it. A bit of gris — gris was pinned to her tongue— oanga.'

'Oanga? You seem to know a lot about Obeah, Aunt Cornelia.'

Suddenly Aunt Cornelia's expression grew wary. 'One hears servants talking. Besides, that's a fine thing to say, coming fromyou. Do you think I've forgotten your little— experiment,shall we say? — and the unfortunate reaction it provoked from themobile vulgus —'

'Tell me about the oanga,' Pendergast interrupted, with the briefest of glances toward D'Agosta.

'Very well. The oanga, they said, was a fetish of a skeleton or corpse soaked in a broth made from Shrove Tuesday ashes; bile of a sow; water from a forge used to harden iron; blood of a virgin mouse; and alligator flesh.'

'And its purpose?'

'To extract the dead person's soul, make him a slave. A zombii. You of all people know all this, Diogenes!'

'Still, I appreciate hearing it from you, Aunt Cornelia.'

'After the corpse is buried, it is supposed to come back as the slave of the person who placed the oanga. And do you know what? Six months later, that boy died over on Iberville Street — found suffocated to death in a tied — up sack — and they said it was the zombii of Miss Marie, because the boy had pulled down Mrs. Ducharme's laundry. And then they checked Miss Marie's tomb and found it empty, or so they say. I hardly need add that the Ducharmes were discharged. You can't have servants embarrassing a genteel home.'

'Time's up, Mr. Pendergast.' The doctor rose with a sense of finality. The attendants sprang to their feet and took their places on either side of her wheelchair. The doctor nodded and they began turning her around, heading for the back door.

Suddenly, Aunt Cornelia swiveled her head back toward them, fixing her gaze on D'Agosta. 'You were awfully silent today, Ambergris. Cat got your tongue? Next time, I'll be sure to prepare some of my lovely little watercress sandwiches for you. Your family always adored them.'

D'Agosta could only nod. The doctor opened the door for the wheelchair.

'And lovely to see you again, Diogenes,' said Aunt Cornelia over her shoulder. 'You were always my favorite, you know. I'm so glad you finally did something about that horrid eye of yours.'

* * *

As they drove past the gates, the headlights of the Rolls — Royce cutting through the drifting layers of fog, D'Agosta could stand it no longer. 'Excuse me, Pendergast, but I have to ask: you don't actually believe that stuff about oanga and zombiis?'

'My dear Vincent, I don't believe anything. I am not a priest. I deal with evidence and probabilities, not beliefs.'

'Yeah, I know. But I mean, Night of the Living Dead? No way.'

'That is a rather categorical statement.'

'But…'

'But what?'

'It's clear to me we're dealing with someone trying to mislead us with this voodoo shit, sending us off on a wild goose chase.'

'Clear?' Pendergast quoted the word back to him, his right eyebrow elevating slightly.

D'Agosta said, exasperated, 'Look, I just want to know if you think it's even remotely possible we're dealing with a real zombii. That's all.'

'I'd prefer not to say what I think. However, there is a line of Hamlet you might do well to keep in mind.'

'And what's that?'

'There are more things in heaven and earth, Horatio — Need I continue?'

'No.' D'Agosta sat back in the plush leather seat, musing that sometimes it was better to leave Pendergast to his unknown thoughts than to try to force the issue.