Robert.
All thoughts of secrecy were over now. In this mood she wanted the world to know. She was feeling good. Not so self-conscious. She'd lost a bit of weight since Catherine had died and that helped. Maybe she could sell the idea to the teenage magazines –
She knew it wasn't funny but she couldn't help smiling to herself. She went up to Robert. Her friends were all around him, but he wasn't taking any notice of them. Not flirting anyway, even after she'd left the hall. He hadn't seen her come back in and she'd watched him for a moment to check. Lisa was desperate to get his attention, but he just ignored her. He was still wearing part of the costume but had dumped the helmet and the shield somewhere. The dagger was in its sheath on his belt. When they'd danced that slow dance earlier, she'd been aware of it against her thigh. It had made her feel sexy. She'd never felt quite like that before.
She stroked his neck. He must have had a bit to drink too, but you wouldn't have been able to tell. He'd taken the whole Up Helly Aa thing seriously. She liked that about him. He wasn't like the lads at school who saw everything as an opportunity to take the piss. Now, with the music in the background, she felt she was floating above the scene in the hall, looking down at it from a distance. All the dreadful things that happened, with Catherine and the hassle with parents and the stuff that had gone on at school, all that was over.
At last she could believe that anything was possible. The music stopped for the band to have a drink. Robert bent down to talk in her ear.
'I was thinking of going back to Brae. There's a party at the Haa. Do you want to come?'
'Why not?'
'I think I've done my bit in town, don't you?'
'Sure! She was thinking she had nothing to lose.
Her parents weren't expecting her back until the morning and anyway it might be safer away from Lerwick. She didn't want her parents turning up and making a scene if anyone had told them what was going on. 'Are you OK to drive?' Maybe he would teach her, she thought. That would make her useful to him. She could stay off the drink and drive him home after parties. He wouldn't dump her then.
'No problem: he said, though when they went out to the van, he forgot that he hadn't locked it and dropped his keys and started swearing. She wondered why he was so edgy. The whole evening had gone well and she knew he'd been looking forward to it. He hadn't admitted it of course, but he was like one of the kids in her mother's school, taking the starring role in the Christmas show. Perhaps now it was over it was an anticlimax. For the first time she thought she was the strong one in the relationship. When it came down to it, she'd be the one to look after him.
Driving north, he didn't say much. He was driving very fast and on one of the bends nearly lost control. The gritting lorries had been out earlier in the day, but now the roads were slippery. She was tempted to tell him to slow down, but the last thing she wanted was to end up like her mother, always nagging and carping. And anyway there was something exhilarating about driving so fast in the dark along an empty road. He'd pushed a CD into the player and really loud rock music was playing. It gave her the same sensation as staring up at the sky. She wasn't timid Sally any more. Everything had changed. She reached out and put her hand on his knee, rubbed her thumb along the inside of his thigh.
In Brae there were still lights in some of the houses but the place was quiet. Sally had heard about the Haa.
Catherine had told her about a party there, though Sally had never understood how she'd managed to get herself an invitation. She was thinking about that, trying not to drag up the old resentments, when Robert braked sharply to turn off the main road. The van skidded and spun. Sally had her eyes shut, imagined it sliding off the road or crashing into the wall in the corner, the boot smashed in, one or both of them dead. But somehow Robert managed to keep it upright. It was just facing in the wrong direction.
'Shit,' he said, 'that would be all I'd need. The cops sniffing round, taking breath tests! He gave a nervous little giggle which made her realize he'd been a bit frightened himself. Again, she thought she was probably stronger than he was. He reversed slowly until he was facing the right way and took the hill down towards the beach more slowly.
As they approached the house, they could see the bonfire on the beach was still smouldering.
He introduced Sally to his mother. Perhaps that was why he'd brought her. He'd known Celia would be here and he'd wanted them to meet. Sally hoped that was how it was. It made her feel like a real girlfriend, Robert wanting her to get to know his family. Now though, she wasn't sure it was going to work. She didn't think she'd get on with Celia. It was like she was in some sort of fancy dress, with the long black dress and the slash of lipstick on her white face. She'd been the first person they'd seen when they'd got to the Haa and Sally had been shocked. She'd heard of Celia Isbister, but never met her before. She'd expected her to look more like a real mother.
She couldn't let Robert know what she was thinking though. She could tell he'd been keen to see Celia. It was as if he was caught somewhere between his mother and his father, desperate to please them both. That was why he'd driven out here like a madman. It seemed a weird relationship to her. Not like mother and son at all. More like they were lovers or something. He seemed so pleased to see the woman when they went into the house and she appeared at the doorway as if she owned the place. He put his arm around Celia and pulled her to him. Sally never had that sort of physical contact with her parents. She wouldn't have wanted it. She didn't think it was healthy.
Before she followed him inside, she waited for a moment in the courtyard. Everything was quiet outside, though she imagined she could hear waves breaking on the beach. The tide would have turned. Looking up she saw a man's face at an upstairs window, staring down at her. He must have heard the van. She recognized him as Duncan Hunter.
Everyone was inside now. The bonfire was still alight because someone had put a huge bit of driftwood on it but even that was nearly burnt away, so there was nothing much left but embers and ash. Celia took them through to a long living room which was almost empty, to show the fire to them through French doors. Everyone else was in the kitchen. A baking tray with blackened sausages stood on the top of the stove, with some baked potatoes, cold now, their skins wrinkled, brown like a tortoise's neck. Nobody was eating. It wasn't like a party. They were still there, still drinking, but the music was turned very low and there was a quiet, subdued air.
'Duncan's daughter's missing,' Celia said. 'The police came earlier. We haven't got any details. Duncan phoned Fran, but she couldn't tell him much. It's probably nothing. She's that sort of kid. The kind to wander off. But with all that's happened lately, you can imagine what Duncan's going through. He's waiting upstairs by the phone!
'Cassie?' Sally said. 'I babysit for her sometimes! She thought it was quite exciting to be on the edge of the drama.
'It'll kill him if anything happens to her: Celia said.
'Should we be here, then?' Sally didn't want to imagine what it would be like to lose a child, but she didn't think you'd want a load of strangers in your house.
'God yes, we daren't go. Duncan hates being by himself! Celia had a way of talking which made you feel a bit stupid. Sally couldn't take to her at all, though of course she'd try for Robert's sake. It probably wasn't fair to judge.
Celia had obviously been drinking very heavily. Besides the lipstick, she was wearing black eyeliner which had become smudged and close to she looked a bit of a mess. There was something sticky and disgusting on the sleeve of her cardigan.
Margaret might not be a brilliant mother, but at least she maintained a bit of dignity. She knew how to behave in company. Sally would have liked to escape. Instead she started drinking again. She knew it was a mistake and she should keep a clear head, but when she saw Robert and Celia whispering to each other, standing so close that their heads were touching, she couldn't help herself.
Chapter Forty-Four
Magnus was nearly asleep when he heard voices outside his cell. It sounded like an argument. He thought, It's Up Helly Aa. Someone with too much drink inside him. His uncle had taken him to watch the procession when he'd been a boy and there'd been a lot of drinking even then. One year, Agnes had been there too. She'd have been very
