surreptitious glances. He heard a low cacophony of ' ' ohmygod!ohmygod!ohmygod!he'scomingover! ' '
Myron stopped directly at their table. There were four girls. Or maybe five or even six. Hard to say. They all seemed to blend into one another, into one hazy, indistinct mesh of hair and black lipstick and Fu Manchulength fingernails and earrings and nose rings and cigarette smoke and too-tight halter tops and bare midriffs and popping gum.
The one sitting in the middle looked up first. She had hair like Elsa Lancaster in The Bride of Frankenstein and what looked like a studded dog collar around her neck.
The other faces followed suit.
'Like, hi,' Elsa said. .
Myron tried his most gentle, crooked smile. Harrison Ford in Regarding Henry. 'Do you mind if I ask you a few questions?'
The girls all looked at one another. A few giggles escaped. Myron felt his face redden, though he wasn't sure why. They elbowed one another. No one answered.
Myron proceeded.
'How long have you been sitting here?' he asked.
'Is this, like, one of those mall surveys?'
'No,' Myron said.
'Good. Those are, like, so lame, you know?'
'Uh-huh.'
'It's like, get away from me already, Mr. Polyester Pants, you know?'
Myron said 'uh-huh' again. 'Do you remember how long you've been sitting here?'
'Nah. Amber, you know?'
'Like, we went to the Gap at four.'
'Right, the Gap. Fab sale.'
'Ultra sale. Love that blouse you bought, Trish.'
'lsn't it, like, the total package, Mindy?'
'Totally. Ultra.'
Myron said, 'It's almost eight now. Have you been here for the past hour?' '
'Like, hello, anybody home? At least.'
'This is, like, our spot, you know?'
'No one else, like, sits here.'
'Except that one time when those gross lame-os tried to move in.'
'But, like, whoa, don't even go there, 'kay?'
They stopped and looked at Myron. He figured the answer to his prior question was yes, so he plowed ahead.
'Have you seen anybody use that pay phone?'
'Are you, like, a cop or something?'
'As if'
'No way.'
'Way.'
'He's too cute to be a cop.'
'Oh, right, like Jimmy Smits isn't cute.'
'That's, like, TV, dumb wad. This is real life. Cops aren't cute in real life.'
'Oh, right, like Brad isn't totally cute? You, like, love him, remember?' .
'As if And he's not a cop. He's, like, some rent-auniform at Florsheim.'
'But he's so hot.'
'Totally.'
'Ultra buff.'
'He likes Shari.'
'Eeeuw. Shari?'
'l, like, hate her, you know?'
'Me too. Like, does she only shop at Sluts 'R' Us, or what?'
'Totally.'
'It's, like, 'Hello, Dial-a-Disease, this is Shari speaking.' '
Giggles.
Myron looked for an interpreter. 'I'm not a cop,' he said.
'Told you.'
'As if'
'But,' Myron said, 'I am dealing with something very important. Life-and-death. I need to know if you remember anyone using that phone the one on the far right forty-five minutes ago.' '
'Whoa!' The one called Amber pushed her chair back. 'Clear out, because I'm, like, gonna barf for days, you know?'
'Like, Crusty the Clown.'
'He was, like, so gross!'
'Totally gross.'
'Totally.'
'He, like, winked at Amber!'
'As if'
'Totally eeeuw!'
'Gag city.'
'Bet that slut Shari would have Frenched him.'
' 'At least.' '
Giggles.
Myron said, 'You saw somebody'?'
'Serious groatie.' , 'Totally crusty.'
'He was, like, hello, ever wash your hair?'
'Like, hello, buy your cologne at the local Gas-NGo?'
More giggles.
Myron said, 'Can you describe him to me?'
'Blue jeans from, like, 'Attention, Kmart shoppers.' '
'Work boots. Definitely not Tirnberland.'
'He was, like, so skinhead wanna-be, you know?'
Myron said, 'Skinhead wanna-be?'
'Like, a shaved head. Skanky beard. Tattoo of that thing on his arm.'
'That thing?' Myron tried._
'You know, that tattoo.' She kind of drew something in the air with her finger. 'It kinda looks like a funny cross from, like, the old days.'
Myron said, 'You mean a swastika?'
'Like, whatever. Do I look like a history major?'
'Like, how old was he?' Like. He'd said like. If he stayed here much longer, he'd end up getting some part of him pierced. Way.
'Old.'
' ' Grampa ville. ' '
'Like, at least twenty.'
'Height?' Myron asked. 'Weight?'
'Six feet.' .
'Yeah, like six feet.'
'Bony.'
'Very.'
