Odell. I was intending to ask your permission shortly-’
‘Seems to me you are accustomed to doing everything the wrong way round,’ Sir Arthur barked. ‘Young people today-’
There was a flutter in the doorway as Lavinia Odell hurried in. ‘Arthur? Mrs Goodfellow said that you had brought your blunderbuss into the library-’ She stopped as she took in Cory’s desperate expression and Rachel’s agonised one.
‘Whatever is going on here?’ she enquired mildly.
Rachel looked at Cory. Cory turned back to Sir Arthur and ploughed on.
‘Indeed, sir, if you would give me permission to call on you we may sort this matter out-’
‘Just a moment,’ Rachel interposed. She was trembling. ‘I need to talk to you about this, Cory.’
Cory gave her a smile that made her whole body tremble. ‘My dearest Rachel-’ he began.
‘Please don’t,’ Rachel said wretchedly. ‘Oh, Cory, there is no need for all this simply because we have shared a few kisses.’
There was a sharp intake of breath from Lady Odell and an angry bellow from Sir Arthur.
‘A few kisses! Damn it, Newlyn, seems you have been playing fast and loose! Heard you were a scoundrel- never believed it until now!’
Cory made a gesture of desperation. ‘Sir! My intentions are of the most honourable. Rachel-’ he turned to her ‘-please tell them that this is no flirtation.’
Rachel took pity on him. ‘Cory’s intentions
‘Modern girls,’ Sir Arthur said disagreeably, turning his displeasure on her. ‘Never seem to know what they want.’
Cory was looking as chagrined as a man might under the circumstances. He came across to Rachel and entangled his fingers with hers. His touch undermined all her defences.
‘You have not said that you will marry me,’ he said musingly. ‘Can I really not persuade you, Rachel?’
‘Yes…no!’ Rachel said wildly. ‘We cannot talk about this now, Cory. Please be sensible and leave. I can manage Papa. He will have forgotten the whole matter by tomorrow and be engrossed in
‘Damned if I will,’ Sir Arthur said. ‘Dashed poor show!’
‘I fear that you are outvoted, my sweet,’ Cory said. ‘I shall not have forgotten, your parents will not have forgotten and I would swear that you will not have forgotten either.’ He turned to Sir Arthur. ‘I shall call on you tomorrow, if I may, sir.’
Lady Odell pushed aside the blunderbuss and stepped forward. ‘Do put that thing down, Arthur,’ she said. ‘You will shoot yourself in the foot if you are not careful. Cory, dear boy, we should be delighted to see you.’
‘Thank you, ma’am,’ Cory said, bowing formally. He turned to Rachel. ‘I know this is a little abrupt, my love, but I do hope that you will accept my suit.’
Rachel rubbed her forehead. This was not turning out as she had planned and every moment made matters more difficult.
‘I had barely become accustomed to the idea that we were courting, Cory,’ she said.
‘Hah!’ Sir Arthur bridled. ‘Seems to me that you have been engaging in a great deal of dalliance for a young lady who barely considers herself to be courting!’
‘Really, Arthur,’ Lady Odell said, ‘it is a little late to wake up to ideas of conventional propriety now, in your fifty-fourth year. I seem to recall,’ she added with a little, blissful smile, ‘that we had our own unconventional courtship.’
Sir Arthur’s moustache quivered.
‘And,’ Lady Odell continued, ‘since dear Cory wishes to marry our daughter and we esteem him so highly, there can be no barrier.’
To Rachel’s surprise she herded Sir Arthur out of the room with the efficiency of a well-trained sheepdog.
‘We must get back to work now, my love,’ she said, pausing to kiss Rachel’s cheek on the way out. ‘Congratulations!’
Rachel waited until the door had closed behind them and then sat down rather heavily on the library chair. Cory came across to her, but before he could touch her she put out a hand to stop him. She saw the arrested look that came into his eyes as he took in the anguish in hers.
‘What is it, Rae?’ he said softly.
‘I am sorry, Cory,’ Rachel said. ‘I am very honoured, but I fear that I cannot accept your proposal.’
The words came out in a rush and once she had said them, she felt greatly relieved. Then she saw the hurt in Cory’s face and felt absolutely dreadful.
‘That sounds remarkably well rehearsed, Rae,’ Cory said. ‘Have you been practising it all night? Was that what you were trying to tell me before?’
Rachel evaded his gaze. That was the trouble with having a suitor who knew her so well. There could be no concealment or pretence. They knew each other too well for falsehood. Some things had changed between them, and some had not.
She was remembering her doubts of the previous night and now she was trembling with the effort of trying to explain herself whilst holding on to the thing that was most precious to her: Cory’s friendship.
‘This does not feel right,’ she said. ‘I do not think we should announce our betrothal simply because Papa has got some mad idea of impropriety in his head and seeks to enforce it with his blunderbuss.’
Cory gave her a little, gentle shake. ‘Sweetheart, you know it is not like that. I asked you to marry me yesterday because I wanted to and if we have to tell everyone sooner rather than later, then what is the difference?’
‘Our betrothal seems to be a little hasty,’ Rachel said miserably.
‘I agree that we may not have had much of a courtship,’ Cory said with a grin, ‘but we have had an acquaintanceship of seventeen years. I hope that you will consider that sufficient preparation?’
He looked closely at her woebegone face. There was a grim line to his mouth now and it did not ease. ‘You are not telling me the whole truth, are you, Rae?’ he said. ‘There is something else that troubles you.’
‘I am sorry,’ Rachel said.
There was an edge to Cory’s voice now. ‘What is it that is making you unhappy, Rachel?’ He took both her hands in his and looked directly into her eyes. ‘Why do you not wish to marry me?’
There was a pain lodged somewhere in Rachel’s breast. It mirrored the pain that she could see in Cory’s eyes.
‘It is not as simple as wishing to or not wishing,’ she said with difficulty.
She saw Cory’s eyes darken. Without warning he pressed his mouth to the palm of her hand.
‘How difficult does it need to be?’ he asked. ‘Rachel, I love you! I have not been able to stop thinking of you. I want you to marry me and travel with me.’
Rachel’s hands were trembling but she wrenched them away. She was staring into Cory’s eyes, where she saw the vestiges of their old friendship fading away. There was nothing of the childhood companion there and everything of the ardent lover. She could see the concentrated desire and the control that he was exercising over it. It frightened her even as she felt the answering tug of desire.
‘I…’ The word came out as a whisper. ‘Oh, Cory, do not ask it of me. I cannot.’ She was on her feet, turning her back on him for she could not bear to see the hurt in his face. This was terrible, far worse than she had imagined. ‘Cory, do not,’ she repeated. ‘I do not want this.’
Cory stood up too. ‘Please tell me,’ he said, with constraint, ‘that I am not forcing my attentions on an unwilling lady. Please tell me, Rachel, that you are as attracted to me as I am to you.’
Rachel spun round. ‘Yes, it is true!’ she said. She put her hands up and covered her face briefly. ‘I could never lie to you, Cory. I feel the same desire that you do, but-’ her gaze challenged him to keep his distance ‘-that is not enough.’
Cory shook his head slowly. ‘Why not?’
‘Because we do not want the same things!’ Rachel burst out. ‘I have been thinking and thinking about this. To travel and explore is your life and to stay at home is mine! We would do better to try to salvage our old friendship before it is too late. That is more valuable that a transient attraction.’
