The Top Gun's Return

same time had a self-conscious sense that she was playing a part-concerned daughter, poised and completely adult-for an audience of one.

She was mildly surprised when her dad seemed to accept her in the role. He made that wry face yet again and said, 'Yeah…that was stupid.' Then, with a softening smile, he was back in the daddy mode. 'Honey, as you can see, I'm gonna live. You might as well go on back to school. Hey-you didn't skip any classes, I hope.'

'Just finished my last final,' she said, with a little toss of her head-and again, intensely aware of the second listener just outside the range of her peripheral vision. 'I'm all packed, actually. I was getting ready to load up my stuff when I got Mom's message. So…guess I'll be home in a little while.'

'Great,' her dad said, and added, as if it had just occurred to him, 'Hey, do you have any plans for this weekend? It's Memorial Day weekend, right? I've got the use of a lake house, ski boat included, over on Lake Russell. I was thinking we could all go. In fact-Cory, why don't you stay on, join us?'

It seemed to Sammi June that there was a long, shimmering silence between the question and its answer. I won't look at him. I don't want him to think I care. And…why do I? He's Dad's friend, not mine.

'Let's see…what's today, Thursday? I still have some loose ends to tie up in Atlanta, but I guess I can do that tomorrow morning, be back by early tomorrow evening. Will that be okay?'

'Sounds good,' said her dad. 'Then we can all head over to the lake together Saturday morning. How 'bout you, Sammi June?'

She shrugged and said, 'Sure. I guess. Why not?'

Cory Pearson looked at his watch. 'Well-I'd better be heading on back to Atlanta.' He stepped forward and took her dad's hand in a two-handed, buddy-type handshake. 'Take care of yourself, Lieutenant.' From behind the lenses of his glasses, blue eyes touched hers briefly, and Sammi June felt a sensation something like a shiver. 'So-I guess I'll be seeing both of you tomorrow.' And then he was gone.

And now, alone with her dad and without the audience she'd been playing to, Sammi June found that she didn't know what to say. Her audience had left, but so had the distraction he'd provided, and without it she was once more forced to cope with the feelings she'd brought into the room with her. Feelings she didn't want to express because they made her feel much too vulnerable, too much like the child she was trying so hard not to be: Daddy, don't you dare leave me again! Please…I don't know what to do with you in my life, but I don't know what I'd do without you, either.

'Okay,' she said, all brisk and light and perky, leaning to kiss his cheek, 'if you're sure you're all right, I'm gonna be going, too. Gotta get packed. See you at home-later, okay?'

It was only when she got outside of the cubicle that she realized her heart was racing. As she strode through the E.R., she fluffed her hair with her fingers and gave herself little settling-down shakes, the way she did when she was taking her position on the soccer field, just before play began, to rid herself of nervous jitters and butterflies, and by the time she burst through the automatic sliding door and into the warm, muggy afternoon, she was feeling calmer. Until she saw that Cory Pearson was standing beside her bike, obviously waiting for her.

'Hey,' she said, by way of a greeting, giving no sign of the sudden jolt she'd just felt under her ribs.

He smiled, squinting a little in the bright sunshine. 'Thought this might be yours.' He tilted his head toward the bike leaning drunkenly against the handicapped signpost. 'Figured I'd better get directions to your place, if I'm going to be going there tomorrow.'

'Sure,' said Sammi June. 'No problem.' She bent over to unlock her bike, and was way too aware of the way her top separated from her jeans when she did that-only a couple inches of skin, probably, but she felt almost naked. She straightened, glad to have an excuse for her red face. 'Got a piece of paper? You're gonna probably want to write this down-it's kind of in the middle of nowhere.'

'In the car.' She started walking, and he walked along beside her, the bicycle between them. He glanced at it, then at her and said, 'Can I give you a lift back to your dorm?'

She gave a little snort of laughter. 'That'd be great, actually. It's all uphill going back-and I mean a long way uphill.' She paused, then said ruefully, 'I didn't exactly stop to think things through when I left. I just sort of…jumped on my bike and took off.'

'You were worried about your dad,' Cory said with a shrug. 'That's understandable.'

'Yeah,' said Sammi June, 'I was.' There was a quivery mass of emotion in her chest all of a sudden-the same one that had been there a moment ago when she'd faced her dad alone in the E.R., and that she hadn't wanted him to know about. Now, to her very great surprise, she heard herself saying to Cory, 'It's really weird, you know? I mean, it's so strange and awkward, having him suddenly back in my life. I don't really know how to talk to him… how to act with him. And then, when I think about losing him all over again, I just about…I can't even…' She swallowed and jerked her face away from the eyes she could feel watching her, studying her-keen, blue eyes, and much too intent.

'Not strange at all,' the owner of the eyes said gently, and she let go of an odd little gust of relieved laughter.

Chapter 15

They had stopped beside a nondescript tan-colored car. Cory took keys from his pocket and unlocked the trunk, then took hold of the bike by its handlebars. Sammi June took hold of the back wheel. They both lifted, then looked at each other.

'Think…mine's gonna have to go in first,' Sammi June said.

'Okay,' said Cory, 'here we go. No, here…okay, this way-'

After a couple of false starts they managed to get most of the bike wedged into the trunk. They ended up standing side by side, so close to each other that Cory's shirtsleeve was brushing Sammi June's bare arm. Then, instead of moving apart and going their separate ways, they both went on standing there, not moving…neither of them saying anything. And somehow, although neither of them appeared to move a muscle, she could feel the space between them growing smaller, until it wasn't just his sleeve that was touching her arm, but the warm, firm muscle under it, as well. She felt her heart stumble, and heat envelope her. Her breath seemed to catch on something sharp inside her chest.

'I think that's got it,' Cory finally said in an odd, strangled-sounding voice, and suddenly the warm place along the side of Sammi June's arm felt abandoned and cold.

'It's not very far-just up at the top of the hill.' She went around to the passenger side of the car and got in, while he did the same on the driver's side. Their doors made twin slams, and then they were both busy settling in, buckling up.

Cory started the car and drove out of the hospital parking lot. He made a careful left and they headed up the long hill. Sammi June, her heart still thumping crazily, tried to think of something to say.

'So,' Cory said after they'd gone a few blocks, looking over at her while they waited at a traffic light, 'your dad calls you Sammi June?'

She made a disparaging sound. 'Most people do.'

He nodded thoughtfully. 'I like it. It's cute.'

She threw him a look. 'Yeah, but I'm eighteen years old. 'Cute' isn't exactly the image I'm going for right now, okay?'

He laughed. The light changed, and he drove on. They covered a few more blocks. At the next stoplight he turned to her and said, 'How do you feel about Sam?'

Behind the glasses, his eyes were that incredible, intense blue. As she gazed into them, Sammi June realized that what she felt was afraid. It reminded her of when she was a little girl and her parents had moved around so much. This was the way she'd felt standing in the doorway, about to go into a new classroom, a new school. On the brink of something scary and unknown. 'I assume you mean, as a nickname?' she said, and then shrugged. 'It's okay.' A smile hovered. 'I kind of like it, actually.'

'Okay, then. I'll call you Sam.' The light changed. The eyes shifted away from her, and she could breathe again, but only in quivery, shallow breaths.